How To Forgive Others?
How to Forgive Others?
To learn how to forgive others can be very difficult, but if you look at it, there is no option. Most all of us have been taught how to forgive one another, but did we just learn the words or do we understand the importance of the specific instruction that God commands for us to do.
God does not suggest, or tell us that it would be a nice thing to forgive others. No, He simply tells us that if we do not forgive others, then He will not forgive us. There is not much room for misunderstanding in that command in Matthew 6:14-15.
Here are some helpful links:
Forgive Others, Because… Hurt People, Hurt People!
We must develop and maintain the capacity to forgive. He who is devoid of the power to forgive is devoid of the power to love. There is some good in the worst of us and some evil in the best of us. When we discover this, we are less prone to hate our enemies. ~ Martin Luther King, Jr.
Matthew 6:14-15 For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.
Learn How To Forgive Someone Who Has Hurt You?
You Can Choose How to Forgive or Not To Forgive!
- Do you say things like I forgive the person, but I do not want to see them or talk to them again? How would you feel if God said to you I forgive you but I am going to avoid you and not speak to you, would you feel forgiven? That is not forgiveness. God’s forgiveness always restores.
- Do you say or think things like this? I forgive the person, but I will let God deal with them. If you want God to judge and punish them, that is not forgiveness.
- Do you still have any anger or bad feelings toward the person? When you fully forgive the person, anger will be replaced with pity for them.
- Do you still hold on to the memory of the wrong done to you and you think about it often? True forgiveness forgets, because of the healing of forgiveness the pain disappears as if it did not happen. When God forgives, He forgets it forever as if it never occurred.
- Do you have trouble accepting God’s love for you, and accepting God’s forgiveness? If so it could be because you are standing in judgment of another person because you don’t have mercy, it is hard for you to believe that God has mercy and compassion for you.
- Bottom line, are you forgiving or just pretending to forgive? Forgive others, and you will be able to forgive yourself and accept God’s forgiveness in your life. If you would like to talk to someone more about forgiveness talk to God, and if you still need more help you can call. 1-800-633-3446
What To Do About How To Forgive Others?
We all have the freedom not to forgive someone, but we do not have the ability to control of the consequences if we make that decision. ~ Bill Greguska
Romans 12:18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.
Facts About How To Forgive?
- Forgiveness is not easy…saying the words, “I forgive” is easy, but to truly forgive takes prayer and faith and continual giving it over to God until it does not bother you any longer. When you can think on the wrongdoing and not have it bother you any longer, then you know that you have truly forgiven.
- God commands us to forgive. It’s not optional. He is our example and if He can ask His Heavenly Father, to forgive those who nailed Him to a cross, we can learn to forgive with His help. There is absolutely nothing that is impossible to forgive with God’s help. With really traumatic events, we must work through the pain and the grief though. Forgiving is not sweeping something under the rug and pretending it didn’t happen. That will only come back to haunt you later.
- Forgiveness does not mean you are excusing or condoning bad behavior.
- Forgiveness is for you. It’s not for the person that wronged you. It is to set you free. It is so you are not held prisoner paying the price for someone else’s wrongdoing. Forgiving is for you and you alone. Often the person who has hurt you feels nothing…no shame, guilt or remorse. The wrongdoer may even have forgotten the event, but we can stay trapped in bitterness, anger, and unforgiveness for years. It can affect our emotional, mental, spiritual and physical well-being, while the other person is absolutely oblivious to our pain. Unforgiveness rarely harms the other person. Usually, we are the only victim of our unforgiveness.
- Forgiveness is between you and God. You do not have to go to the other person. Forgiveness is you handing over the wrongdoing and the person who did it and saying “Lord, I give this to you so you can deal with it. It is between you and them now, so I can be free.”
- Forgiveness does not mean that you “forget” the wrong that was done to you. Forgiveness is like cleaning out a wound. If you don’t clean out a wound, it festers, hurts and it doesn’t heal properly. Once it is cleaned out, it can heal. Once healed, you will always have the scar but it doesn’t hurt anymore.
- Forgiveness does not always mean reconciliation. Forgiveness and trust are two different things. Some people are unrepentant. They may not feel like they have done anything wrong. Perhaps, they may be sorry for the moment, but you know that the bad behavior will continue for whatever reason. God does not call us to be in abusive relationships. He does not call us to be doormats or to remain in relationships that are toxic or unhealthy.
Decisions You Need To Make
- You also have a choice to make things right with someone if you have done them wrong.
- You have a choice to accept someone else’s forgiveness they have come to you and asked you to forgive them.
What Does The Bible Teach About How To Forgive?
- Forgiveness doesn’t mean you condone what the person did or that you have to trust the person.
- Forgiveness is about getting your heart right with God. It is foremost about your relationship with God.
- It frees you from a lifetime of bondage to a bitter and hardened heart.
- Forgiveness isn’t a one-time act. You’ll have to continue to choose forgiveness.
- We forgive because God has forgiven us.
- Forgiveness doesn’t mean you’re letting the other person off the hook. It’s entrusting God to take care of the situation for you.
- Forgiveness isn’t reconciliation. Reconciliation requires genuine repentance on the part of the person who was wrong.
Related Pages Of Encouragement:
A Special Link for a Little Extra Encouragement
How To Overcome Unforgiveness In Your Life?
Learning How To Forgive!
Each one of us does or says things to offend one another from time to time.
- When I find myself in that place, I attempt to go to the person whom I hurt and humbly apologize for what I did or said. I would say something like, “I was wrong for ______, please forgive me?”
- There are other times that both myself and the other person both said or did things that were wrong, in that case, I would say something like, “I am sorry for my part in this situation, would you please forgive me? (I would not expect an apology in return, but if there is one, that would be great!
- In both of the about examples, I was able to confess my sin, wrongdoing, destructive action or words, and move on with a clear conscience and hopefully amended relationship.
My brother Tom has taught me to turn the page and let go of the issue if you have done everything in your power to make things right. In doing so, we free ourselves from the burden of resentment. At the same time, we have done all we can do on our side to offer peace. Remember what the greatest command is?
It Is As Hard To Forgive Ourselves As Others…
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The Christian life is not a constant high. I have my moments of deep discouragement. I have to go to God in prayer with tears in my eyes, and say, ‘O God, forgive me,’ or ‘Help me.’ Billy Graham
Matthew 6:15 But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.