Seek Wise Counsel From God, And Also Others!

Seek wise counsel from trustworthy people!Please contact us if you have any questions or comments or want some encouragement.

People seek wise counsel from some sources that are not truly reliable. God and His word need to be the main focal point when seeking wise counsel rather than worldly advice.  Sometimes the devil tries to tempt us, and other times our flesh rises to gain pleasure in sin. Talk to God in prayer, and He will direct your ways. My favorite prayer is when I am praying, I say to God, “What do you want me to do, Lord?” Then I sit back and listen attentively to what God is trying to tell me through scriptures that I have read in the past, conversations with wise and godly people, or sometimes simply a prompting from God in His extraordinary way. ~ Bill Greguska

 

James 1:5  If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.


Seek Wise Counsel Through Grieving Times!

 


What Does It Mean To Seek Wise Counsel?

In friendships, we seek wise counsel from each other. It is good to make yourself available to help a friend in need, but it sometimes can be a matter that can backfire. I went through a divorce many years ago and learned that asking friends to help us can sometimes be overwhelming and strain the friendship.

Below are some ideas to consider when counseling a friend, acquaintance, or family member. Often it is very costly to see a counselor, so here are some things to consider when you guide each other. Talking about faith can threaten another person, but without God, you may put on a temporary bandage, but in the long run, their lives would not be transformed compared to if you invited God to be a part of the solution. I suggest you talk it over with them to see if they want to ask Christ into the counseling/helping formula. This approach may or may not be suitable for each person. But without God involved, at best, you could put a temporary bandage on any problem.

Matthew 19:26 Jesus looked at them and said, “With man, this is impossible, but with God, all things are possible.”

 

 


Why Would Someone Seek Wise Counsel From You?

  • Start by inviting your friend or acquaintance to open up to get to know one another and ask questions about their life and where things are going. Have they explained their meaning when referring to themselves as Christian or non-believer? Instead, we search for the fiber of a believer’s walk. Is there abundant evidence of a submitted life in Christ that defines the person as a child of God?

 

  • John warned: (1 John 4:1-3). Dear friends, do not believe every spirit but test the spirits to see whether they are from God because many false prophets have gone out into the world. This is how you can recognize the Spirit of God: Every spirit that acknowledges that Jesus Christ has come in the flesh is from God, but every spirit that does not acknowledge Jesus is not from God. This is the spirit of the antichrist, which you have heard is coming and is already in the world.
  • Listen carefully as the person describes their problem. Be aware of their attitude toward God and sin. Do they express evidence of godly sorrow (2 Cor 7:10), or do they grieve only because of the personal consequences they are experiencing? Ask if they believe that with God’s help, the answer they are looking for can be found. If your friend needs more help than you feel you can give them, then have them seek counsel.

 

  • Ask the person questions that require a biblical response. You will discover if they have any relationship with God. For example, if the person talks about getting a divorce without biblical grounds, you can ask them: “What do the Scriptures say about what you are considering doing? What does God’s word say about divorce?

 

  • Do not offer anything other than Scripture. Biblical counseling, even for unbelievers, is designed for lasting outcomes, not temporal relief. The counselor must not provide a psychological substitution for the truth when salvation is at hand.

 

  • It is good to interact with non-Christians. The Lord came to those needing help, not those who felt they did not. Many pre-believers know that I’m a Christian; I do not so-called “hit them over the head with the Bible.” But preferably with compassion, knowing that I was a pre-believer lost in this world abusing drugs and alcohol years ago. I would be a hypocrite to talk down to anyone. We are all sinners saved by God’s grace.  Sometimes pre-believers come to me on my website asking questions and seeking advice. There is a different way of approaching those who don’t know God’s Word.

 

 


About Unbelievers (I prefer using the term “Pre-Believer”)

  • A pre-believer does not understand the things of the Spirit (1 Corinthians 2:14).
  • They may perceive spiritual stuff as dumb (1 Corinthians 1:18).
  • Some could be easily offended by Christianity (1 Corinthians 1:23; Psalm 119:165).
  • Pre-believers are not enabled, empowered, or illuminated by the Spirit of God (John 16:12-15).
  • They have no context or ability to experience sustainable change by God’s Word (John 17:17).
  • Those who do not believe live under the Father’s wrath (John 3:36).
  • Some pre-believers could be a mocker of the Word of God (2 Peter 3:3-4).

 

 


 

Important Practical Reminders!

1. Don’t Assume That Their Time With You Is Meant For An Evangelistic Ambush

Christians have a reputation, whether valid or not, for hijacking awkward moments in non-believers’ lives and turning them into an open door for proselytization. Be sensitive to their surface needs as you prayerfully seek direction from God about the needs of their souls.

2.  When People Seek Counsel, Really Slow Down And Listen Intently

This step applies to more situations than just our discussion today! We Christians tend to speak more quickly than we listen. Additionally, we also hear sometimes only find a way to give a rebuttal or clarify something being said to us by non-believers. Hurting people sometimes say things they don’t mean, or which are inaccurate or even, in our opinion, ungodly. Non-believers can be refreshingly honest about their doubts toward or anger with God. Avoid turning their inspirational words into an argument. They come to seek counsel, not a debate.

3.  Present To Them Objective Hope

Christians know that God loves our non-believing friends and family members. They may not share our confidence in God’s love, but we know He cares for them. Look for ways to gently share how God has come alongside you in times of heartbreak, doubt, or pain. Tell them your own story if the opportunity arises, leaving off that grappling hook to reel them in to see things the same way you do. All humans share one thing: we have all known pain and suffering.

4. Never Forget That There Is Only One Savior (That Savior Is Not You!)

You likely cannot fix their dilemma. You probably won’t be able to make all the pain disappear. Their fear will not magically disappear simply because you care for them. Jesus ultimately has to do the heavy lifting in times of struggle, so you can be free to serve your non-believing friend, family member, or acquaintance without any sense of guilt or failure if things do not immediately change for them. God will use you in those lives, contingent more on your availability than your ability. Do not fear messing things up; you will not create any catastrophe as long as you are intentionally loving, relationally sensitive, and sincerely compassionate.
When people seek wise counsel, point them to Jesus as their source of wisdom and healing, rather than looking to you for the answers.

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