Becoming hooked on getting high, I grew blinded by addiction, and my life was not my own any longer. It was like I signed it over to Satan himself and could not get it back for many years’ worth of pain and heartache. I loved drinking Annie Green Spring and Thunderbird wine and would drink a bottle with friends at the park. The Annie Green Spring wine seemed to go down smooth but hit me later, although the Thunderbird hit me hard since it was so much more potent.
It was not until I got my eyes off of the drugs and alcohol and on to the possibility of being clean and sober, that I finally started to recover. Through my experience with marijuana, without a doubt, there is an emotional type of addiction that happens. I lived to use and used to live. I wonder why I put drugs and alcohol more important than you, Lord, and other people like my family and other essential elements in my life!
Proverbs 23:31 Do not gaze at wine when it is red when it sparkles in the cup when it goes down smoothly.
Do You Think Society Is Too Accepting Of Alcohol?
Humbly I can say that I was very good at basketball with the potential to do excellent in high school and maybe college. I fought to stay away from the drugs and did, for the most part, but my junior summer was a disaster.
Sometimes situational problems or depression can take us down to an unhealthy level. My best friend, Steve Mader, died when I was 16, and it was tough to process my feelings all on my own. Satan grabbed me in a headlock that made me fall to my knees, where I started to worship marijuana and beer and wine and wild sinful lifestyle as if it was my God.
Again I ask myself, why God did you allow bad things like this to happen? I know you give us free will, yet with that freedom comes responsibility, which was something I was lacking.
The immediate gratification from the drugs and alcohol was just a trap that messed up things in my life. If only I could have seen what my addictions were leading my life, I would not have done all that I did. The United States has been brainwashed with all the beer advertisement on TV alone!
Why, God, is there too much pressure on high school athletes to succeed? To cover up my using, I began to lie regularly to my parents and others and even steal from my parents. I had to find a way to support the full-blown habit developed by my junior year in high school. Expulsion from Pius XI and only one year earlier I was on top of my game in basketball were a huge setback. I had trained hard for many years to run and jump and play the game of basketball, to the best of my ability. Again I ask myself, why God?
Luke 21:34 Be careful, or your hearts will be weighed down with dissipation, drunkenness and the anxieties of life, and that day will close on you unexpectedly like a trap.
I put in many, many hours a day in the off-season and many, many hours a day in the season to sharpen my skills. I was having a competitive edge which almost helped me to make the varsity team as a sophomore. I was a contender to be possibly successful in college basketball due to the many years of training and discipline I put into the game of basketball with God’s help.
I put my whole heart into the game of basketball and did pretty good, but looking back on it all, I would not have done it the same way. Even though I loved the game and still do, I used to treat basketball like a god, just like I did with alcohol and drugs. As I said, I was blinded by addiction. The pressure to succeed in basketball put a lot of weight and stress on me, which was too much for a 16-year-old high school student, I believe. I put my focus on the wrong thing, and if I had focused on you, Lord, I would have been far far better off!
What I have done with my addictions and habits was to give them to God, share them with others to get help, and realize they are from the devil and ask God to help me break the chains.
Do you think that marijuana is a safe drug? Why God did I started smoking pot around age 12, the summer I was going into the ninth grade? Many of my friends were going to different high schools the next year. But why God?
Psalm 6:2 Have mercy on me, Lord, for I am faint; heal me, Lord, for my bones are in agony.
Why God was this was very hard for me since we all had known each other as good friends for the last five years going to school and playing basketball on the team together. My basketball testimony was critical to me because basketball was my life.
I finally got good at something to call my own. Although the dark side of my basketball testimonywas that I turned away from God and grabbed tightly onto alcohol and drugs, that was a way of life that never expected in a million years to develop into.