Avoid Bad Counseling!Avoid bad counseling at all cost! NeedEncouragement.com

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While I have been very fortunate to have had good counseling over the years, there have been an instance or two of bad counseling that can leave a person feeling discouraged and hopeless. One particular experience with a Christian counselor who was way out of line with me. Instead of providing support during my separation and possible divorce, this person was brutally mean and insensitive towards me. It’s disheartening when those who are supposed to help us end up doing more harm than good.

However, I’ve learned that inadequate counseling can happen to anyone. That’s why it’s crucial to get references from people you know and trust before committing to a counselor. There are many wonderful counselors available who can offer valuable insight into our thoughts and feelings while helping us reason things out more clearly – especially Christian counselors who bring faith-based perspectives into their work! So if you’re looking for guidance on life challenges or just need someone to talk to, don’t be discouraged by past experiences of bad counseling – keep searching until you find the right fit for your needs! ~ Bill Greguska

Proverbs 15:22 Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers, they succeed.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Bad Counseling Exposed!

Avoid Bad Counseling From Good Intended People!

When I was going through my divorce, a Christian from church volunteered to come to my house to talk with me. It turned out that he spoke so much and did not understand the hurt and pain that I was experiencing. All he wanted to do was quote scriptures at me over and over relentlessly. Unfortunately, I had to ask him to leave my house. This bad experience taught me that when people seek counsel, they need to be heard—and directed after being listened to. People can mean well but do more harm than good. Be careful who you allow to counsel you. Avoid bad counseling at all costs! Let the Lord be your direct line of counsel. Allow the Lord to put the right people in your life to help you. ~ Bill Greguska

But please don’t let one bad experience deter you from getting the support you need! Inadequate counseling may happen sometimes, so always ensure that whoever you choose as your counselor comes highly recommended by someone you trust or seek advice from professionals online if needed. There are many wonderful counselors available who will listen without judgment or criticism while helping guide us towards making positive changes within ourselves – including Christian counselors! Remember: we all need someone to share our thoughts & feelings with at times; don’t give up on finding the right fit for yourself!

 

Or if you rather text JESUS (53787) To talk to a Christian who cares!

 

 

Mistake #1: Bad Counseling Is Giving Advice Without Truly Listening

One of the biggest mistakes Christians (and others) is to take counsel or advice without carefully listening. When we listen, people trust us more, and we can provide better information and advice.
  • My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry. (James 1:19)

 

  • The first to present his case seems right till another comes forward and questions him. (Proverbs 18:17)

 

 

 

Mistake #2: Bad Counseling Is Displaying A Judgmental Spirit

The person with whom you speak, mentor, or counsel may have sinned in almost unthinkable ways or made severe mistakes. However, if you tell them that you are in judgment of them, they are unlikely to benefit from your advice when they seek counsel from you.
Please be sure to show concern for people who have sinned. Reflect on your own life before you knew the Lord. They should sense that you care, not that you condemn.
  • For this reason, he had to be made like his brothers to become a merciful and faithful high priest in service to God and make atonement for the people’s sins. Because he suffered when he was tempted, he could help those tempted. (Hebrews 2:18)

 

  • For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet was without sin. (Hebrews 4:15)

 

 

 

Mistake #3: Bad Counseling Is Talking Too Much

Has someone ever given you a long speech about your mistakes? If so, you probably tuned out partway through. Speeches rarely work! People seek counsel, not a lecture.
When you get people involved in a discussion, they are more likely to change. Remember to ask questions. It’s often helpful to ask people what is on their minds instead of turning them off with your sermon.

 

 

Mistake #4: Bad Counseling Is Giving Worldly Advice

It’s easy to give “worldly” advice, for it is all around us on talk radio, television shows, self-help books, Etc.
  • See to it that no one takes you captive through hollow and deceptive philosophy, which depends on human tradition and the basic principles of this world rather than on Christ. (Colossians 2:8)

 

  • All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting, and training in righteousness so that the man of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work. (2 Timothy 3:17)

 

  • For the word of God is living and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart. (Hebrews 4:12)

 

 

 

Mistake #5: Bad Counseling Is Not Suggesting Homework

Help others choose something to do as “homework.” People are much more likely to change if they plan to follow up by studying something or doing some activity related to what they have discussed. People seek counsel and have certain expectations.
Homework is most likely to be completed if it is mutually agreed on. Try to come up with something that seems reasonable to the person you are counseling or advising.

 

Some Specific Scriptures To Encourage You:

Proverbs 15:22 ESV 

Without counsel, plans fail, but with many advisers, they succeed.

Proverbs 24:6 ESV 

For by wise guidance, you can wage your war, and in abundance of counselors, there is victory.

Proverbs 19:20-21 ESV 

Listen to advice and accept instruction that you may gain wisdom in the future. Many are the plans in the mind of a man, but it is the purpose of the Lord that will stand.

Proverbs 13:10 ESV 

By insolence comes nothing but strife, but with those who take advice is wisdom.

Proverbs 20:18 ESV 

Plans are established by counsel, by wise guidance, wage war.

Psalm 1:1-5 ESV

Blessed is the man who walks not in the counsel of the wicked, nor stands in the way of sinners, nor sits in the seat of scoffers, but his delight is in the law of the Lord, and on his law, he meditates day and night. He is like a tree planted by streams of water that yields its fruit in its season, and its leaf does not wither. In all that he does, he prospers. The wicked are not so but are like chaff that the wind drives away. Therefore the wicked will not stand in the judgment, nor sinners in the congregation of the righteous.

Proverbs 28:26 ESV 

Whoever trusts in his own mind is a fool, but he who walks in wisdom will be delivered.

Proverbs 19:20 ESV 

Listen to advice and accept instruction that you may gain wisdom in the future.

Proverbs 1:7 ESV 

The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge; fools despise wisdom and instruction.

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