Response Letters 1

Answers to your many questions

The questions are in bold, and the response letter answers are below the questions. Here are some encouraging scriptures about wise counsel.


 

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Question:

I really need help, I am running on empty!

 

Response Letter:

Hi JoJo,
There is an expression that goes like this called HALT:
Do not get too…
My suggestion to you is to stop right now and pray to God to give you the wisdom you need to make some changes in your life.
James 1:5  If any of you lack wisdom, you should ask God who gives generously without finding fault.
  1. Are you saying yes to too many things?
  2. Are you trying to please everyone but forgetting your needs?
  3. Are you neglecting God lately?
  4. Are you getting enough sleep?
  5. Are you getting enough exercise? NeedEncouragement.com/exercise
  6. Are you eating healthy foods? NeedEncouragement.com/healthy-food
Without knowing more details, I think if you reflect on these questions and the HALT idea, you are on your way to recovery from your running on empty.
It sounds like you need to pamper yourself. Do not feel as though you have to take on the whole world, if you call in sick tomorrow, that might be the wisest thing you could do for yourself. When was the last time you saw your doctor?
When I was going through a divorce back in 2007, my pastor Dave Briscoe wisely back then gave me a quote to think about. It went like this:
“Life is a marathon, not a sprint, throttle down or you will run out of gas!” ~ Pastor Dave Briscoe
I hope and pray, that what I have shared with you can be of help to you! Throttle down and hang in there, call upon the Lord. 1 Peter 5:7 Cast all your anxiety on Him, because He cares for you!
800-633-3446 call 24/7

 

Question:

My husband and I have been married 13 months. Together for 18. I have temporarily left our home due to angry outbursts that have made me feel unsafe on a physical and emotional level. Seeking counsel.

Response Letter:

Morning Jill,
When you said that you temporarily left your home, did you mean just packed a few clothes and things and plan to come back real soon like a day or two?
My first advice to you would be to pray for your husband and your marriage and also yourself.
Second of all, I strongly advise you get a third person involved to mediate between the two of you. Someone that he can trust and confide in and someone you can trust and confide in too. Maybe a pastor, maybe a counselor, but someone soon! Make sure that you do not get too comfortable away from him. Otherwise, your marriage will be on a slippery slope to divorce.
As much as you would want, you can not change your husband, but the Holy Spirit can and will if you put your marriage in an open palm to the Lord. But you would be wise to look at what your husband is getting upset about; maybe the problem is drinking? Perhaps it is something you are doing or saying? Maybe it is excess stress, money problems, etc.
Having a third person to bounce things off of, will benefit both you individually and your husband personally and the two of you as a couple. NeedEncouragement.com/free-christian-counseling
DO NOT EVEN THINK ABOUT OR REFER TO THE WORD DIVORCE; you have just hit a speed bump and bailing out now (even thinking about bailing out) is the worst thing you can do, you have become married before God and the others at your wedding. Divorce does not solve your problems; it only changes them. I know, I have been divorced myself, and if my wife would have put more faith into our marriage, we might have still been married and stronger because of it, but she wanted immediate gratification which ended in a broken home, major problems for my stepson, etc.
To reiterate:
  1. Pray for your marriage. NeedEncouragement.com/how-to-pray
  2. Get wise counsel that you both agree upon NeedEncouragement.com/talk-with-someone
  3. Examine your own life (get the log out of our eye before trying to get the speck out of the other person life)
  4. Have a plan to get back into the house asap
  5. Forgive your husband and ask him to forgive you
  6. Discover the root of this problem and work with your husband to resolve it (work as a team)
Jill, I am praying for you right now that your heart can be soft yet at the same time that you use good wisdom from God to get your marriage back on track!
800-633-3446

Question:

Hi. I was inquiring about some counseling, someone for my 10-year-old daughter to speak with. Her father and I separated in 2014 and divorce finalized in 2016, we have 50/50. I feel she needs some encouraging words and guidance on how to handle two separate homes and her communication.

 

Response Letter:

Good Morning Angela,
Thank you for reaching out. Divorce is a tough thing for a child to go through. My first thought would be, is there any possible chance that you and your husband could get back together? If for some reason that is not an option, unfortunately, what your daughter is experiencing is a part of the divorce problem that our country is experiencing.
Unfortunately, I too have been divorced myself, I can relate to the pain you are experiencing. I was involved in a divorce that I did not want, and my stepson is 26 right now, and the separation was 11 years ago, he has positively been affected negatively by the divorce yet despite that, he had made it through, yet he has experienced some damage because of it which to a point is almost inevitable. You just need to do your best, point your daughter to the Lord. Listen to your daughter’s needs and get her involved with church and with other Christian kids.
I wish I had an easy fix for you, but I do not. All I can say is to try to talk with your ex respectfully, explaining that both he and you love her and that you are very sorry that you and her dad cannot live together anymore. Divorce is an excruciating thing and will leave scares not only on you and your ex but also on her. The Bible talks about God hating divorce, and this is just one of the by-products of separation that you will have to go through prayerfully. NeedEncouragement.com/how-to-pray
Try to put your ‘adult emotions’ aside no matter why you got divorced, and be as nice as you can in front of your ex and even say nice things about him to your daughter. You may be divorced, but you do not have to “act” like you are divorced.
Unfortunately, you are in a tough situation and expect some repercussions to the decision that you guys made to get divorced. It would be wise to go to God in prayer and ask Him what you need to do. Is there a chance that you and your ex could get together all three of you maybe once every other week. That might brings some healing to not only her but the two of you. NeedEncouragement.com/healing-from-divorce
To minimize the scares I would encourage your daughter to talk about her feelings with you, write about her feelings, Make sure you give her enough time and attention, do things with her and consider seeing a Christian counselor  I would suggest that you call 800-633-3446 to talk with someone who can listen to you and give you some insights. NeedEncouragement.com/talk-with-someone
Trust that God has this situation under control and that He has a plan for your life as well as your ex-husband’s life, and as well as your daughter’s life! I will be praying for you, and I suggest that you do the same.

Question:

I would like to join the email list.

 

Response Letter:

Hi Arzoo,
Thank you for contacting us, I will put you on our email list right away.
I send out at least one emails per week on average.
Feel free to forward them to others that you know who might be interested.
Have a blessed day!

Question:

The slander & lies toward me at work now has escalated to managers now on board and giving me a discipline letter. I’m only 6 1/2 months away too early retirement. I met union and told me to put in some incident reports as well as do a rebuttal yo letter I received. In the past when I try to defend myself things kept getting worse. Do I put in incident reports against them? How do I do this and still leave it in God’s hands?

 

Response Letter:

Good morning Shelly,

I am glad you have reached out for some encouragement. I will try to give you my opinion, yet it is hard to say without knowing all about what you are going through.

A couple of things to keep in mind are:

  1. Pray about this situation asking God for His wisdom. James 1:5 If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.
  2. Pray that you can peacefully talk to the person(s) who have accused you.
  3. Pray for those who persecute you. Matthew 5:44 But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.
  4. You might consider filing a grievance letter in your defense as long as the claims are false against you.
  5. You need to pray for yourself, that you do not let your hurt and anger come out in words that will discredit your character.
  6. God will always defend us, yet sometimes we need to speak up for ourselves and defend ourselves respectfully and calmly. Do not overreact and raise your voice or speak ungodly towards them.
Is there someone at work that could give you some advice?
I would respectfully defend myself and confront the person who falsely accused you of making sure you have a witness there (not alone).
I pray that you handle this situation in a mature way that will give honor to God, and when it is all over, give praise to God!

Proverbs 3:5-6 Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.


Question:

I lost my baby boy February, 4th 2018. Every since I lost him, I’ve been feeling down, I have days where I break down and cry because I miss him so much. I was only 4 1/2 months, but I still feel like he was a part of me. I was just starting to love him. He was my first child. I have days where my mood changes when I see babies and pregnant friends, I get very emotional.

 

Response Letter:

Hi Jenise,
I can understand your feelings of depression, and it must be excruciating. I do not know if my words to you can encourage you? I can not take away your pain, only God and time can, but I can try to point you to Him via this email hopefully!
I do know who can encourage you, and that is Jesus Christ our Lord and Savior. Trust in Him today by telling him of your gut-wrenching pain that is still lingering with you. I will try my best to encourage you, and I will also pray for you…
I remember years ago when my daughter’s mother broke up with me, and I was at wit’s end about it. I recall vividly that a counselor who I went to see told me something profound, she said, “God loves me, and He would understand my feelings of great sadness, yet at the same time, God would also want me to experience joy in my life again despite the loss of my daughter’s mother, and my daughter.”  (This happened 34 years ago and I can remember it like it was yesterday. I felt an unusual peace knowing that I could release my daughter’s mother and my daughter Sherry.) I realized that I still had my life to live, and her words were a great reminder for me.
Later on in my life, my former pastor’s wife Sue Sauer, also gave me some wise counsel when it comes to letting go of painful memories and disappointments. Sue told me, I need to keep an open palm about all people and things in my life.  This she explained because if God decides to take a person of a thing out of my life (palm) if I do not have an open palm, it will be excruciating and that God is ultimately in control, realizing God allows things to happen beyond our human understanding.
I am incredibly sorry for the loss of your child. I do have a few suggestions to KEEP in mind to help you:
  1. Keep praying and keep close to God.
  2. Keep in fellowship with other believers in your church and friends, if you do not have a church, find one. NeedEncouragement.com/find-a-good-church
  3. Keep talking about this to those you know and trust who can help comfort you and guide you through this time in your life.
  4. Keep busy with your life and other relationships that you are involved in.
  5. Keep open to the leading of the Lord, maybe adoption or trying to have another child might be an option down the road.
  6. Keep your faith and do not doubt the Lord, for he still has a plan for your life.
  7. Keep up with your health, exercise, eat healthy foods, get proper sleep, drink plenty of water.
  8. Keep your communication with God, write God a letter when you are up to it leasing you child to Him, and seeking God’s will.
Please forgive me if I said something that might have hurt you, that was not my intention at all, I want to encourage you to get your life back on track, as my brother Tom told me during an unfortunate time in my life by telling me something that made sense and helped me. He said, “Do all you can do, and then just turn the page.”
I pray that you will start today to begin to heal as you apply some of the things that I suggested. Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not unto your own understanding, but in all your ways acknowledge Him and He will make your paths straight. Proverbs 3:4-5
May God bless you!

Bill Greguska Smiling face with halo

(Continued Letter 2)

Hi Jenise,
I was thinking about your situation, and a Christian friend of mine Peg told me about a website, here is a link that I think will be of help to you. At least please watch the video. I think you will find comfort in watching it.
May God bless you!

Question:

Kindly assist me on what to do to avoid sex before marriage with my partner. We already took it far, have a baby together and don’t know how to stop it.

 

Response Letter:

Hi Gaylord,
I am glad you contacted me. To answer your question, I would have to ask you a question, “Do you love the Lord with all your heart? If the answer is no, then whatever I say will not really matter to you anyway.
But if the answer is yes, then you would not want to dishonor God by continuing to have sex before marriage. 
You would need to talk this over with your girlfriend, and if she really does love you (for more than just having sex with you) and you with her, and if she loves the Lord too, then she would be in agreement with you and this would not need to be a problem any longer. Problem Solved!!!
Bringing up this question tells me that the Holy Spirit has convinced you in your heart. Keep in mind that sin is pleasurable for a season, yet with sin comes spiritual death if not confessed to God. It says in the Bible in 1 John 1:8-9 If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us.  If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.
 
We all need to get right with God, no matter what the sin may be. In your case, it is sex before marriage, but you have a contrite heart seeing that you came to me for godly advice.
When you talk with your girlfriend, you will learn about her character and yours too. If she is not willing to avoid having sex then you I suggest that you be the leader and refrain from it yourself. I can guess that you are living together which makes things harder. (Check out this link NeedEncouragement.com/sex-outside-marriage )
Here is a scripture that might be of help to you.  1 Corinthians 7:8-9 Now to the unmarried and the widows I say: It is good for them to stay unmarried, as I do. But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion.
 
  1. Do you guys want to get married?
  2. Have you ever talked about marriage?
  3. What is stopping you from asking her to marry you?
  4. Do you have a church that you attend?
  5. Do you have any Christian guidance from anyone?

Hebrews 13:4 Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral.

Gaylord, Believe me when I tell you that I am not judging you or speaking down to you, I agree with the Bible, because I was not married and got my girlfriend pregnant which caused a lot of problems in our life. My ex-girlfriend and I broke up, and that caused a great deal of pain and heartache for the both of us and my daughter who is now 34 years old. Thank God that God loves us even when we sin, but many consequences go with our sin that we have no control over. Fortunately, my daughter and I have a good relationship, and she too knows the Lord, Praise God for what the locust has devoured, God has restored! You still have a chance to avoid more judgment of God. I suggest that you get under the umbrella of God and find yourself a church (check out this link  NeedEncouragement.com/find-a-good-church ) and recommit your lives to God and raise your baby with love for the Lord and with respect and fear of the Lord
Proverbs 1:7  The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge, but fools despise wisdom and instruction.

I hope what I have shared will be of help to you and your girlfriend and baby. If you need some help with how to pray, (check out this link NeedEncouragement.com/how-to-pray ) I will be praying that God gives you strength and wisdom that those in this world will not give you, and that you get on the right track today! When you talk with your girlfriend, be very patient and let her talk after you tell her what is on your mind about this matter. You will be just fine!

Bill Greguska

You can call this number if you would like to talk with someone who cares 800-633-3446

You can chat with someone by (checking out this link needencouragement/talk-with-someone )


Question:

Need someone to talk to about my family situation

Response Letter:

Hi Jennifer,
It is very wise for you to want to seek counsel, you have made a right decision!
Please feel free to call this phone number to talk with someone who can give you some guidance. 800-633-3446
You can also chat with someone by visiting https://needencouragement.com/chat/
I will pray that God gives you the wisdom that you need to help yourself and family.

God Bless You,

Bill Greguska


 

Question:

Good day Sir, I greet for the great work which god have been using you and ministry for, and I used this opportunity to request for free stuff material in a relationship in any area and spiritual sir, thanks

 

Response Letter:

Good Morning Festus,

To receive any free stuff through my website, all you need to do it go to NeedEncouragement.com/free-stuff and all you need to do is follow the links and sign up a free Bible and other things available to you.

Have a blessed day!


 

Question:

May I please receive a women’s daily devotional study Bible and Daily Devotional or journal?

 

Response Letter:

Hi, Thank you for contacting NeedEncouragement.com. I hope things are going well for you.

As far as getting a devotional from us, what I can do is to point you to NeedEncouragement.com/devotionals which you will find some information on devotionals to help you.

You might also want to contact 800-633-3446 to be able to talk with someone right away, or you can visit NeedEncouragement.com/talk-with-someone that you can chat with someone online if that is something you might find helpful.

God bless you,

Bill Greguska


 

Question:

Need a free Bible

Response Letter:

Hi Robert,
Thanks for contacting me. You can get your own free Bible by going to https://needencouragement.com/free-bible/ ;Just follow the prompts and sign up and one will come right to your house. Free Bible and Free Delivery!

May God bless you and continue to draw himself closer to you.


Question:

I feel to far gone or like I’ve already failed at being a practicing Christian. I need help. I need help.

 

Response Letter:

Hi Tamela,
Without hearing more, I would first suggest that you take this concern to God in prayer, if you need some help with prayer, go to: NeedEncouragement.com/how-to-pray
Second of all, I take it that you are not involved in a church. Or if you are you then need to talk to those in your church. If you need a church, go to: NeedEncouragement.com/find-a-good-church.
If you need to talk to someone right away, you can call 800-633-3446.
If you would rather chat with someone, you can go to: NeedEncouragement.com/talk-with-someone.
I pray for you right now that whatever you are struggling with specifically, that the Lord gives you the wisdom to determine what you ought to do. Look up James 1:5 which will encourage you! Do not let yourself become discouraged, trust that God has a plan for your life, and your job is to find out what it is by reading his word in the Bible and praying about it.

God bless you,

___________________________________________________________________________________

Question:

Need to talk to someone, please

Response Letter:

Hi Karla,
I got your message, and you can call 800-633-3446, or you can text with someone by going to NeedEncouragement.com/talk-with-someone
If you need a church to attend, you can check out NeedEncouragement.com/find-a-good-church
I will pray that whatever you are going through, that you ask God to walk with you through it.
Also, pray that God gives you the wisdom to know what to do and what not to do.
May God bless you,

_______________________________________________________________________________

Question:

Can you please send me the print book about eating disorders thanks

 

Response Letter:

Hi,

I am glad you reached out for help, that is an excellent sign that you are serious about getting things in your life together.

My first question is, do you believe that God can heal you from your eating problem? If not, my second question is, are you willing to ask God in prayer to help you? Here is a link that can give you some ideas on how to pray for help. https://needencouragement.com/how-to-pray/

I am sorry I do not have any printed materials for eating disorders, but you can check out this link that might be of some help to you. https://needencouragement.com/overeating/

Check out the website for other topics that might be of help to you. I pray that you continue to have a desire to help yourself and that your support will come first of all from Jesus Christ and whoever God puts in your path. Here is a phone number you can call to talk with someone 800-633-3446. Or you can check out https://needencouragement.com/talk-with-someone/

I hope what I have shared has been of some help to you…

Bill Greguska ><>

____________________________________________________________________________

Question:

I would love to share more in detail, but I just lost my dad a week ago. He was like my best friend. He leaves behind my mom and six kids. I’m trying to be as strong as possible. Please, I need to talk to someone. I’m hurting, grieving and broken inside.

Response Letter:

Hi,

I am very sorry for your loss. My mom died three years ago, and I think of her often. My first thought is to point you to Jesus Christ. I do not know what you believe, but if you trust in God he can and will comfort you and direct you…If you do not have a relationship with God, then I would strongly advise looking into one.

You can check out.  https://needencouragement.com/need-god/

For dealing with the grief, you can visit.  https://needencouragement.com/grief/

When my mom died, I found comfort in journaling, here is a link that you might find interesting. I have a running log that I wrote things about my mom. She too was my best friend. I am the youngest of 4 Italian siblings, and my mom always favored me. https://needencouragement.com/death/

I hope what I shared has helped a little…Also, you can call 800-633-3446 to talk to someone that can also help you!

God bless you and keep looking to God for your strength and comfort.

______________________________________________________________________________

Question:

Sex before marriage. We are 51-year-old grandparents both of us, feel way too old even talking about this, but I don’t want an opinion about what the Bible says.

 

Response Letter:

Hi Larry,

The Bible is very clear about sex outside of marriage. Here is a page you can visit that might give you what you are looking to discover. https://needencouragement.com/sex-out-side-of-marriage/

Here is another link that you might benefit from also. https://www.gotquestions.org/sex-before-marriage.html

I hope what I have shared has been of help to you, if you need to talk to someone, you can call 800-633-3446.

I pray that you find the answers that you need. God bless you!

Bill Greguska ><>


Question:

My husband struggles with addiction and alcoholism, I need some advice

Response Letter:

Hi Sarah,
Without knowing a lot more details, the first thing I would suggest that you do is to go to God and pray for your husband’s addiction, that would be the first step to take. NeedEncouragement.com/how-to-pray
Then if you can talk with him to find out if he would be willing to get some out-patient help with a counselor, or even going to an AA or NA meeting. NeedEncouragement.com/alcohol-and-drugs
Do you go to a church that offers support for alcohol or drugs? NeedEncouragement.com/find-a-good-church
I am just guessing, that outside of his drinking, he is not finding much joy or peace with God, himself, or others in his life. Can you think of what you can do to help your husband since you know if well? Whatever you have tried to do to help him, and it does not work, try to think of another solution. In the meantime, you need to be strong and also take care of yourself. Have you ever heard of Alanon meetings, they are a support group to help those who have husbands, or wives, or relatives that are affected by their significant others drinking or drug problem. Here is a link to get some help for you… https://al-anon.org/newcomers/
I attended both AA and NA for about ten years, and now I only go to church to get my help from God. I have been sober and clean since June 25, 1986, and it was the best thing I did in my life beside accepting Jesus Christ into my life! NeedEncouragement.com/12-step-program
It does not matter how your husband is responding right now, but if you take care of yourself and get your marching orders from God, you will be in good shape. If he finds out that you are interested in going to get help for yourself. I am pretty sure that he will wake up and realize that he has a problem and you’re serious about getting help for the two of you.
I am trusting that God has the answers for you and I pray that they come along quickly. And I pray that God gives both you and your husband wisdom and strength to make it through this together! It might not be easy, but it will be worth it believe me!

 

(Continued)

Is there any way that we can talk on the phone?

Sarah

Hi Sarah,

Sorry, I make it a practice not to talk on the phone especially with women. If you have anything you want to ask me or share with me via email, I’d be willing to talk that way with you a little.
If you don’t have a close friend or family member you can share with you might think about seeing who can be of help to you who you respect and trust.
If you don’t have a church to go to, I would suggest finding one.
If you feel like you’re in any danger, I would suggest removing yourself from the situation temporarily.
Let me know if you would like to ask me anything or tell me something; I’d be willing to help you if I can?
Above all, I strongly, strongly suggest you take all of this to God and prayer!!! I am praying for you and your husband!
Bill Greguska

Question:

I am physically disabled spend a majority of time alone am a Christian but struggle with loneliness and sometimes go to wrong places on the computer. for comfort etc. when I know the answer is Jesus

Do you have any long-term female mentors

Thank you

Karen

 

Response Letter:

Hi Karen,
You are wise to want to hook up with a female mentor. I will ask a few lady friends, and hopefully one of them might be available and interested in being a mentor to you.
I will pray that someone will real soon, yet in the meantime, our number one mentor is Jesus Christ. Go to him in prayer and into his word, and you will find more answers that way.
Please contact me back if you do not hear from me by Friday. I am going to Bible study tonight and maybe one of the ladies there might be available.
In the meantime, you can try to contact this number 800-633-3446. I have discovered that they don’t always answer the first time you call, but they have a beautiful recorded message worth hearing.
God bless you, and we will be in touch soon.

Bill Greguska


(Continued)

Hi Karen,
I am getting back to you sooner than I expected, I just heard from my pastor Mark, I told him about you, and he wanted me to ask you a couple of questions.
1. Do you have a church home, and if so, could they have a mentor for you? If not visit NeedEncouragement.com/find-a-good-church
2. Are there any Christians near her or family members who she could spend time in The Word and fellowship with you?
3. What do you want of a mentor (on phone, email, in person, Skype, etc.)?
4. Describe your faith walk with Jesus Christ – how long, church membership, born again?

This information will be helpful to know to help make a match for you with a possible mentor.

I am sure that God would be pleased if you had a mentor to help you grow closer to him and others, and apparently, you would like one too, be patient, and I am sure God will hear and answer your sincere request for help in a matter of time.

Question:

 

Lately I’ve been struggling with stopping masturbation. I grew up in a Christian home and I know that I have God in my heart but I struggle with masturbation. I’ll stop for a couple days, weeks or months and then I’ll do it again and I don’t know how to stop. I don’t have anybody to talk to and I’m not ready to talk to my parents yet. So I just need help with stopping it and growing closer to God again.

 

Response Letter:

Hi Sam,
Since you to me asking this question, it tells me that you believe that masturbation is a sin, correct?
What would you do if you had a problem with stealing, lying, anger, etc. what would you do about trying to stop any of those sins?
The first thing you would want to do is to pray to God about it and confess your sin because If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. 1 John 1:9
God does not want you to lust, and it confirms that fact because you are asking how to stop.
Keep on praying and also find someone from your church that you can talk with about this. If you do not have a church visit NeedEncouragement.com/find-a-good-church
As far as not telling your parents, I think your parents understand, and it might be good to share it with either your mom or dad or both. Otherwise, make sure you get yourself an accountability partner if you do not want to tell your parents. NeedEncouragement.com/accountability-partner
In the meantime, avoid all pornography, or anything that triggers you to want to masturbate.


Here are a couple of web pages that will be of help to you find some answers.

  1. NeedEncouragement.com/pornography
  2. NeedEncouragement.com/pornography-or-purity
I hope what I have shared has been of help to you.
May God bless you and give you wisdom and strength you need,

Question:

I need Pastor to talk to… How? No money 🙁

Response Letter:

Morning TJ,
It appears to me that you do not have a church that you belong to. If that is the case, I encourage you to find a local Bible-believing church in your area. Here is a link that can help you do so. NeedEncouragement.com/find-a-good-church
The pastors that I have talked to in my life have never charged me any money for their help, I have freely offered them money, but nobody had charged me, except one time when I went to a specific pastor/counselor, then there was a charge.
Keep in mind that you can always take your concerns to Jesus Christ in prayer. Here is a link that can help you in doing so. NeedEncouragement.com/how-to-pray
Two more ideas for you:
  1. Call 800=633-3446
  2. Chat with someone NeedEncouragment.com/chat
I hope my suggestions will be helpful to you. I will pray that the opportunity to talk to a pastor or Christian friend opens up for you. 

(Continued)

Sorry, Sir I reside in Indonesia

I have a church here but I can’t talk to any church in my town, as my situation might get worse

That’s why I look for an online solution, to begin with

TJ

Response Letter:

Hi TJ,
I am a little confused by your comment.
You do not need to tell me what you have done or what someone has done to you.
In that case, I would try the following three suggestions that I have listed below.
I will pray that whatever you are going through right now, that you know that Jesus Christ knows about it and is there for you to lean on, ask God for wisdom and He will give it to you generously without finding fault.
1 Peter 5:7 Cast all your anxiety upon him for he cares for you.

Question:

I really need spiritual counseling regarding my relationship

 

Response Letter:

Good Morning Wendy,
Your request is pretty vague, so I will try to answer it the best I can. Asking that question in the first place makes me think that you are convicted in your heart that something is not quite right. If that is true, that would be the Holy Spirit convicting you to do what is right. Remember that God is a gentleman who does not make us obey or love Him, rather he freely allows us to choose to obey and love Him on our own.
First, have you taken your relationship that you are referring to, to God in prayer? NeedEncouragement.com/how-to-pray
My next question would be, do you think your relationship honors and glorifies God, or grieves His heart?
I am pretty sure you have the answers to these questions, and I hope this has been helpful to you. If you need to chat with a Christian or talk on the phone with a Christian who could help you more, visit NeedEncouragement.com/talk-with-someone or call 800-633-3446.
I pray that you seek to find the answer to your question if you have not already found it through this email.
God bless you,

Question:

I use to be a person that would retaliate when someone hurt me. I use to be evil. I’m not that person anymore. But people are still seeing me as that person. They are talking about me calling me names and trying to make me react like I use to. I prayed about it, but it’s still bothering me. But I’m trying to let go.

 

Response Letter:

Hi Maria,
When I read your note to me, I asked myself, why are you spending time with people who do not appreciate you? I figured that this must be a situation at work or something.  If that is the case which I am not for sure, it is, but if it is, then you ought to let your supervisor be aware of this situation.
2 Corinthians 5:17 says, Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!
If it is just old “friends,” it sounds like you need new friends. Do you attend a church? Here is a link that will help you find a good church in your area. NeedEncouragement.com/find-a-good-church
Since you are not that old person any longer, even though it hurts, do not let name calling and words affect you. Remember that old saying, “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can not hurt me.” Try to keep that in mind and be sure to pray before you get yourself in the area of these ignorant people. Check out NeedEncouragement.com/love-your-enemies
You might want to offer them something small like a can of soda just to break the ice and let them know you are not that same person any longer. Keep praying that you stay that new person that you are. Stay close to God. Keep in mind what it says in James 4:7 Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. 
When you prayed to God about this, what did you hear that God told you to do? Keep on doing what is right, and you will find this matter to pass by soon. Romans 12:17 Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everyone.

Bill Greguska Smiling face with halo


Question:

I need prayer in all areas of life I’m a young childless widow trying to begin again

Response Letter:

Hi Arena,
I am very sorry to hear about your loss, and my first thought would be to point you to a group called “Greif Share” their website is www.GriefShare.org
I will also like to send you a couple of links that might be of help to you.
In the meantime, I would strongly advise you to be around people you know and care about you. Isolation is not a good thing, God has created us to be social creatures, and in time when you are done grieving your loss, the Lord might put someone in your life. I hope you have a church that you attend if not, check out this link…NeedEncouragement.com/find-a-good-church
I pray that the grief and loneliness for the loss of your husband can be comforted by God and his loving grace, and I pray that you seek God each day and I am sure that you will start to see more hope in your life.
I hope my prayer and these links and words I have shared, will satisfy your need that you have at this time. NeedEncouragement.com/how-to-pray
Feel free to call 800-633-3446.
God bless you!

Question:

I am really seeking help through the word to help me not be jealous I have never felt this way before. Every time my boyfriend is talking to another girl or makes them laugh I get this horrible jealousy feeling in me, and I don’t like it, and I want to be able to stop it, and I need help.

Response Letter:

Hi Aubree,
Thanks for sharing with me, I would say that you and your boyfriend need to talk. It is apparent that you are not secure in your relationship with him. He might not be out of line because it is reasonable to speak with others of the opposite sex. There must be some root that has come up to disturb you. My pastor’s wife Sue Sauer told me something very valuable, and I will tell you the same. When we have people or things in our life, we ought not hold on to them with white knuckles so tightly because all people and things are a gift from God that needs to be placed on an open palm because if God decides to take the person or thing from you, it will not be so devastating.
Do not get me wrong; I am not saying that you ought to allow your boyfriend to do whatever he pleases with other women, but you need to first examine your jealousy and figure out what is healthy or what is unhealthy about it. Then after that, plan to have a sit-down talk or go out to eat and discuss your feeling with him.
Here are a couple of links that I think might be of help to you:
I pray that you can differentiate the difference between normal jealousy compared to unhealthy jealousy. You can use this situation to see if you and your boyfriend are compatible before you go any further with your relationship because if you get married to him or anyone else if you have not worked out your jealousy issue, you are in for a lot of heartache and pain.

May God bless you and open your eyes to what you need to learn.

James 1:5 If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.

Question:

 

Response Letter:

Good morning Autumn,
I thank you for reaching out to us. We all need encouragement, and obviously, you see your need for it right now concerning your boyfriend.  To answer your questions the best I can is to point you to Jesus Christ our Lord and Savior. You mentioned that you know that Jesus had died your our sins, but do you understand that he died for your sins. Do you really believe that? If so, then you have nothing to worry about, although if you are in doubt, you need to reflect on your relationship with God.
We will never stop sinning because we are all sinners, but your desire to stop sinning is great. NeedEncouragement.com/stop-sinning
1 John 1:9 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.
As far as what you said about doubting you will make it the 11 weeks of your boyfriend’s basic training, it tells me you are very close to him and that you guys must have talked about getting married at some point. Keep in mind that since you know Jesus, then you know you will not be alone and that the time away if spent wisely will be beneficial to the both of you in your personal growth.
My pastor’s wife told me something that has helped me that might help you, she said, “we need to keep everyone and everything in an open palm to the Lord.” That way if the Lord in your case temporarily takes your boyfriend from you for 11 weeks, that it will not hurt so badly. Needencouragement.com/loneliness

Proverbs 4:23 Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.

During the time apart, you can focus on your family and friends that you might not have spent much time with lately because of your relationship with your boyfriend. Plan some things to do and people to do them with, write your boyfriend letters and talk with him if and when you can. You will be okay, actually more than okay, you will be stronger you will discover who you are and what your potential in life is. If you need someone to talk with you can call 800-633-3446 or go to NeedEncouragement.com/talk-with-someone
I will be praying that you walk closer to the Lord and that he strengthens you and comforts you while your boyfriend is at basic training.

Question:

I am a 47-year-old Male with extreme hatred and bitterness in my heart for God. I so hate my life and the things that he has allowed that I curse him nearly every day. In fact, I don’t even believe he is real anymore, but I continue to hate him daily. I struggled for more than a decade to truly believe he is real and that he has a plan for me. I’ve quit believing only to turn back months or years later. I want things that he has made almost impossible for me to have and this makes me angry at him only.

I am angry at myself as well. I’ve tried to understand why anyone has to suffer negative events at all in this life but I get it that some of us are just not meant to be happy. The “experts” say we should want nothing more than God, but that has been a struggle. I want a woman’s love. I wanted to be a father. I wanted to know what it’s like to love someone but this seems like something God doesn’t want me to have.

I used to think the devil was out to get me. I decided that it was God who was out to keep me from being happy. I decided long ago that I was not going to ever return to trying to live a Christian life since it seems like I am not going to get what I want. I am consumed with hatred for God and myself. Again, I don’t even think he is real anymore. I guess I just need something to blame for the things that have happened to me that were out of my control. I’ve made plenty of mistakes, and I am not blaming God for the fallout from my own mistakes.

He has made it so that I cannot attract a woman. Since I’ll never be a father, the least he could have done was make it easier for me to attract a mate. Part of me wants to continue hating God, and part of me wants to work on eliminating the hatred and rage from my inner being. I’m too old to continue to let life’s negative events keep me down. I’ve tried to just accept what I cant control and forget about being happy and loved but I can’t. It’s what I want.

I don’t believe Bible verses are going to help me but I need someone to help me rid myself of these relationship-killing feelings. I keep to myself because it seems to be my lot in life. If you will respond with something that I can use to at least begin a path to return to the living individual that I believe still lurks inside, I would be grateful. I don’t go to church anymore since I stopped believing. Thank you in advance for any help you can give me.

 

Response Letter:

Hi Cornell,
Thank you for contacting us, and I hope that my words will point you to a better place in your life. I  understand that you have chosen not to believe in God any longer, and I am sorry to hear that your life has become full of extreme hatred and bitterness as you mentioned to me.
You asked me to help you, and since you say that you are so far from God at this point, When you did go to church and believed in God, I can only imagine that your life was better than it is now. Having hatred and bitterness is a frame of mind and heart that I am sure you want to be delivered from.
There is an expression that says, “If a person makes a mistake and continue to do the thing and expecting different results, that is a definition of insanity.” From your letter, I do not think by any means that you are insane, but you have been incredibly hurt by someone or some people in your life, and possibly disappointments.
Since you do not believe in God or the Bible or that scripture can be of help to you, I guess I would suggest that you try to try something new, which is to go back to your old church or even a new church and sit down and talk to your pastor about these things you shared with me. That is what I would do if I were you!
I know it must be miserable to be so full of hatred and bitterness, but there is hope for you and all of us!
For me, my life was unmanageable for many years from about the time I was 18 to the time I was about 26 and what I did was to lean on the Lord and I started to trust God and learn what his plan for my life was beside drugs, alcohol, and trouble.
I guess your other option is to keep on doing what you are doing and expecting different results, but you know what will result with doing that. You say that you are not on good terms with God, In that case, I would at least look at this link because it might be able to help you. https://needencouragement.com/get-right-with-god
You may also want to call 800-633-3446. Or you can chat with someone. https://needencouragement.com/chat/
In the meantime, since I do believe in God and the Bible and that scriptures can point us to what we need in life, in that case, I hope you do not mind if I pray for you!  One thing I want you to do for me since you asked for my help, is for you to take 5 minutes to make a list of all the blessings in your life (good things that are happening, such as your health, a place to sleep at night, food to eat, people to talk with, possibly a job, or someone or some people who have helped you out in the past.)
After making your list, try to find the good in all people and situations that you are in. In other words, an attitude of gratitude. If you need any help with this list I am asking you to complete; then you can always check out for additional ideas https://needencouragement.com/gratitude
Cornell, you are in my prayers that God can bless you somehow so that you can understand and rekindle your relationship with God, or any way that God can make himself real to you again! I also pray for your extream hatred and bitterness, that God does a miracle in your life!

 

Question:

 

Response Letter:

Hi Julie,
I really feel your pain, and I am sorry that your burden is heavy in this season of your life. The first obvious thing I would suggest to you is to take this ALL to God in prayer. Then pray that God can speak to you through someone like a pastor, best friend, relative, maybe even me. NeedEncouragement.com/how-to-pray 
As far as you said that you can not afford to counsel, the real thing is, you can not afford not to have counseling. Not all counseling cost money, Julie, do you realize that prayer is a wonderful form of counseling? Here is a link to get to chat with a Christian online or talk to a Christian on the phone. Maybe there is a friend you could reach out to who knows you well and can give you some compassion and support. Trying to do things on your own, is a recipe for disaster. God has put people in our lives because we are relational people who need each other. NeedEncouragement.com/talk-with-someone
To address your question, “Why can’t I just go home to God?” The answer to that is that God still has a plan for your life! Thinking or wishing to not be here any longer will just make your burden that much heavier. I went through a divorce years ago, I took care of my 93-year-old mother for 8 years, I was depressed and I too asked God the same question you asked. He gave me the same answer I just gave you! Keep in mind that life is like a river, it may seem as though each day is the same, and that the water going by looks the same, but it is new each day, and in time your situation will change too. Be patient and trust that God has a plan for your life, and seek after God to find out what He wants you to do? NeedEncouragement.com/depression
I would suggest that you get some help, I am not sure exactly what you need, but you need some assistance it is obvious! What about your church, the church is there to not only help you in spiritual matters but also in other matters in life, churches have resources to help, so I would give your church a call, if you do not have a church, check out this link. NeedEncouragement.com/find-a-good-church
I pray that what I have shared with you both from my own experiences in my life, also what I have learned from God’s word and what he has revealed to me. Please reach out to the links that I provided and also this phone number 800-633-3446. I am sure that if you try what I have suggested, that your situation will improve, or at least you will be able to see things in a different light.
God bless you and keep you, may his face shine upon you and give you grace!
Julie’s Response
Thank you for the encouragement. I do have a friend who tries to encourage me but I really try not to burden her too much. She talks about the blessings of God and I see them in her life as well as what I might call the defeats as well but she doesn’t let them stop her. Unfortunately I’ve relied on friends before but some people aren’t equipped with the ability to see you succeed past what they actually want you to. It usually ends the friendship if I end up doing better than they want. Maybe it’s their flaw that they want to be needed but as I begin to stand on my own they generally don’t like that and become underhanded so I’m very reluctant to involve people.
I can barely make it through a work week now and have not found a church in my area that I feel comfortable in. I was in a strict Pentecostal Church for 10 years and I just have certain beliefs that not many have. The new music and technology leaves me feeling cold inside.
I’m tired. I’m just so tired. I miss my family who has passed on. None are left here that love me. I would never consider suicide but I wouldn’t fight death if it came …. I want and need some peace , love and understanding.
Everyone expects me to do and fix everything. I’m close to a nervous breakdown I feel….
I’ll try the links , thank you for writing back.
Julie

Question:

Hi, I just want to inquire about Christian counselor. I would be very grateful to have a believer to talk to.

Response Letter:

Hi Tolu,
It is wonderful that you are interested in learning about a Christian counselor. God’s Word will lead you to where you need to be!
I first would suggest that you pray about your request to God, he will lead you to what exactly you need and who you need to talk to.
Also, you can then call 800-633-3446 or you can contact NeedEncouragement.com/chat
I pray that you get the counseling that you need as soon as possible.
God bless you!

Question:

Do you counsel outside your location?

 

Response Letter:

Hi Tolu,
To directly answer your question, it is no we do not counsel from this location. I have pointed you to a couple of good resource links and the phone number 800-633-3446.
Your pastor should be able to help you, but if you do not have a church of your own that you attend, check out this link. NeedEncouragement.com/find-a-good-church
Follow the Lord!

Bill Greguska


Question:

I feel like nobody cares about what happened to me but GOD. I feel like I should of reported physical and mental abuse that was done to my sister by her husband I was only was fifteen at the time and my sister told me not to tell anyone! I saw the abuses with my own eyes and my brother in law hold a gun to my sister’s head, he always would beat the children. But my sister made me promise not to tell anyone about it. I was also molested by my brother from the age of ten to thirteen. I told my sister and she told me it not a big deal I have never told anyone else not even my husband of 37 years. I was also raped when I was 18 years old it was a boyfriend that we had dated for a year and work as missionaries. My brother in law would flirt with me and I’m told my sister and she said he didn’t mean anything about it. Last year he sent me a very sexual text and I showed it to my sister and she said he doesn’t mean anything about it, I also showed it to my husband and he said he sick. I told my husband that I forgave my brother in law but I didn’t want to be around him my husband told me you’re not a forgiving person which hurts. I feel guilty that I never stop my brother in law from.

Response Letter:

Good Morning Lynda,
It is very honorable that you want to keep your promise to your sister, yet you need to weigh things out and also figure out if it was fair that your sister made you promise silence in the first place.
When people go to treatment, they are promised to have what they share with the counselor that everything is confidential. (kind of like you and your sister) BUT if the counselor knows that the person is at risk of physical harm, or suicide, then they are allowed to report it.
Having said this, I think it might be time to break the silence for the good of your sister, and also for your own sake concerning your depression and guilt feelings.
Think of it this way, you can keep things the way that they are and nothing will get better, or you can take a chance to speak up and healing will begin. I am not saying that it will go smoothly but as an outsider, it seems the best way to handle the situation you are in at this time to contact the authorities.
I hope this has helped you, I will be praying that God gives you wisdom and strength to do what is right and best! Remember that God is in control and His will be done.
If you want to speak with someone things, you can call 800-633-3446
God bless you and I am sure you will make the right choice!
Proverbs 3:5-6 Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.
Bill Greguska

 


Question:

l need to find urgent Christian accommodation as l am being robbed and abused in an over 55 complex and this has now gone on for 15months and l want to move back to Sydney. I have been told by neighbors in the area it is the secretary, the abuse is making me sick and l no longer want to live there. Do you know of any type of lockable boarding houses near Rockdale. The abuse is horrific and it is like living in a war zone. at night there is a grey beam of light in my bedroom and l don’t know where it is coming from but have been advised to get out. I find it very hard to trust people and I just want to get out ASAP. I am not in paid employment as I injured my back and legs at work from a Nursing career. How much does the counselling cost? Deborah

Response Letter:

Hi Deborah,
 
I am sorry it took longer than usual to get back to you, I am not sure what to specifically tell you what to do, but I do now that you need to pray about your situation. NeedEncouragement.com/how-to-pray
It is apparent that you are having some dark days, if you are being robbed, you would need to contact your local police department and report your loss to them.
 
It does sound like wise counsel you received leave your apartment to find a new place to live.
 
Do you have a church you attend? If not check out NeedEncouragement.com/find-a-good-church
 
Trust that God has a better plan for you in your life, be sure to pray to discover exactly what His will for you is during this time in your life.
 
I pray that you find wisdom and peace as you to the Lord for your strength!