Response Letters 4

Get your questions answered here!

Below are some of the questions people have emailed us about.

I am not a professional counselor, yet I have been a Born-Again Christian since 1986. Our responses are based on Biblical principles found in the Bible and through prayer and links to our website.

  • If you wish to ask a question, please contact us.

 

 

 


 

 

Hi Jerry,
I am not sure if you heard of Job, the man in the Bible whose wife told him to cure God, but Job did not. Job was an outstanding man. Job’s life was very difficult because Satan was permitted to do what he wanted to Job.
Yes, part of your life was challenging, and some of your life right now is difficult, but trust me, God has a plan in all of this mess. Stay strong and ask God what He wants you to do about your situation through prayer.
There are resources you can look into through the church and government programs that can help you.
Here are a few suggestions for you to take a look at.
  1. Keep praying. God is faithful and has a plan for your life.
  2. Reach out to family and friends for help with your daughter.
  3. Contact your church for resources that might have available to you and your wife and daughter.
  4. Keep in God’s word, for you will struggle too much by yourself on your own. We all need God!
  5. Make a gratitude list of everything you need to thank God for. It always helps me when I make a gratitude list.
  6. Please don’t give up. Please keep your eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith.
God bless you, and I pray that God answers your prayers soon about what you need to do.
Bill Greguska

NeedEncouragement.com

—–Original Message—–

Subject: I don’t know if I’ll have the guts to do it, but I’m thinking seriously about it
Message Body:
My life has been a waste. God doesn’t give a damn about me. I’ve made some bad choices, but mostly bad luck just seems to stalk me. I’ve been screwed out of two inheritances. I’ve been a failure at almost  everything I’ve ever done. What should have been a wonderful blessing in my life–our adopted daughter–has turned into a curse. She makes our lives a living hell. She’s mentally ill, a narcissist, steals from us, mistreats us, and contributes nothing to our family. She’s mean to her own kids. I’m 77 years old and still working for 14$ an hour to barely make ends meet. I keep this crappy job because it offers the only life insurance we have. I’ll never be able to retire. I love my grandsons–7, 6, 2, and 1– but I know their mother will ruin them I have no legacy to leave them I’ve prayed and prayed for help, but God–if He’s even there–evidently either isn’t listening or doesn’t care.
All that’s left in my life is drudgery, a dirty house that is falling apart, an old car doing the same, a chronically ill wife who is forgetting things, and those four beautiful grandsons who because of their mother and my lack of finances have no future.
I just want to go to sleep and never wake up.

 

 

Hi Maria,
I am sorry I could not get back to you sooner, things have been very busy in my personal life with a break-up of a relationship.
As far as how our counseling goes, all you would need to do is share the biggest problem in your life, and I will help point you to Jesus Christ, the
author and perfecter of our faith.
I encourage you to pray for yourself, and I pray that God speaks to you and your needs.
Feel free to email me back with your inquiry. Keep your eyes on the Lord, not your worries!
God bless you,
Bill Greguska

NeedEncouragement.com

—–Original Message—–

Subject: How does your service work
Message Body:
To whom it may concern;
I am in counseling three times a week, but it is not combined with biblical faith although it is helping, but I need someone to pray with Weekly that believes in Christ I can’t always do it alone life is too much.  My Church provided one on one Peer Support but I have to travel to meet her for 45 min and I can’t always make it because of work and personal things I’m going through.  Lots of death and sickness surrounds me along with past severe PTSD trauma.  I don’t want to waste her time.  It’s a bit much for me financially and time wise to travel in rush hour to get to her and take time out of work.  I’m single with some disabilities with only one income . I’m on the church prayer team but they have a lot of people to pray for.  I have too many issues.  I have no one in my life presently who I can talk to one on one about Christ.  No one one on to Pray with without feeling like I’m a burden.  I’m tired of wearing a mask. 
I understand everyone has a schedule and is busy.  I just need some to counsel Me and pray with me.  That’s not so busy.  My Church is too big for one on one weekly prayer and support without traveling in rush hour.

—–Original Message—–

Subject: How to forgive to get forgiveness
Message Body:
Dear beloved sermon in Christ
For a few weeks, I am going through emotional and mental despair, feeling that my wife has cheated on me.
I love her too much, and I know forgiveness is the only action through which I may show my love to her. But I am devastated by Her past. She was afraid of being alone. That’s why she often hides something. I am married. And not feeling strong enough emotionally, I judged her and unfolded her dark past, which I have never expected to hear. Forgiveness is vital for a good relationship, but how ??? Often it seems very hard and sometimes impossible.
I am ruining my mental and emotional peace. It would be my privilege to suggest some steps to make things correct and less painful because I am hurting myself by doing wrong and hurting her.
Your beloved brother
Suyash

 

 

Hi Suyash,
I took some time to think and pray about your inquiry, and I came up with a question for you. Is there anything in your past that you have done that might devastate your wife? If not, you must have lead a pretty holy life, and I commend you for that because most people have a skeleton in their closet. I say this because we are to do onto others as we would want others to do to us.
Have you taken much time to pray about this situation concerning you and your wife?
Have you talked with your wife about your concerns? It would be wise to do so, and if you think it would be helpful to write it down to discuss, then that would be fine. Otherwise, just talk with her. Keeping your thoughts and feeling to yourself can backfire on you, but at the same time, guard your wife’s heart and be gentle with her!
I assume you love your wife, so remember what it says in. 1 Peter 4:8. Above all, love each other deeply because love covers a multitude of sins.
I can understand your devastation by learning something about your wife you did not know or would ever expect.
Matthew 6:15 But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.
Another profitable scripture to consider.
Luke 6:37 “Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven.
Does what you have learned about your wife’s past affect how she is today?
If what I have shared with you has been of help, please email me back to discuss this further.
I pray for your heart for your wife and that you can overlook her past no matter what she did in the past, particularly if what she did does not affect her behavior in the present. I would say that forgiveness is something needed dearly!

Bill Greguska


—–Original Message—–

Subject: Question about divorce
Message Body:

Hello me, and my wife separated eight years ago due to my finding out she had cheated. Now we were both living in sin afterward, dating others during the separation and living in adultery. I’ve just become rededicated to the Lord, and I’m trying to either officially close this chapter with her or reach reconciliation. However, after talking, she still wants to live in sin, so I guess my question is, do I have grounds for divorce?

Eric

Hi Eric,
I am glad to hear that you have rededicated your life to the Lord. Praise God for that!!!
As far as your situation, first of all, you probably already know that God hates divorce. Have you prayed about your situation? What is God telling you to do?
Matthew 19:9 I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery.”

You are saying that you caught your wife having sex with another man, and you separated from her because of that. Have you made any attempts to get back to her?
If your wife cheated on you and she admits it, that is grounds for divorce. BUT that does not mean you ought to rush to get a divorce. As I said, God hates divorce, so for that reason, you ought to make some effort on your part to reconcile your marriage. That would be the right thing to do. Whatever you decide or do not decide to do, you will reap the benefits or consequences of your decision.
Again, I would pray about this for a few days or weeks at the very least and see what the Lord puts on your heart to do?
Since you have become rededicated to the Lord, you need to go to God in prayer and search the scriptures to find out what you ought to do?
I pray that God gives you wisdom and that you follow what he leads you to do.

James 1:5 If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.
May God bless you and give you a clear understanding of what He wants you to do.

Bill Greguska


—–Original Message—–

Subject: Relationship Problem
Message Body:
Hello. I am currently struggling with something in my relationship. I discussed with my boyfriend about boundaries and a Christian relationship. I explained how much it meant to me to remain a virgin until marriage (also no spending the night or living together etc.), and he said he agreed. Still, he had already gone that route with someone else, and it caused a relationship problem, which bothered me because I feel like that’s going to affect us in the long run, or I will never be good enough for him. I’m kind of stuck rn and unsure how to move forward (together or not).
Hi Heather,
I am glad you reached out for advice. First things first, have you been praying about this situation that you are in? It is always wise to go to God first before asking other people, including myself, for their thoughts and options. I hope to help you with your situation.
You are very wise to know ahead of time what you value. I think your decision concerning your boyfriend can be simplified, in my opinion:
  1. If you trust him that he will stay faithful to you and will lift you, not tear you down, (then cautiously move forward.)
  2. You need to get to know and trust him more before you give your heart entirely to him (and your body after marriage)
  3. Make mention to him that if he does not stay faithful to you, then you are gone. (he has a history, are you willing to forgive him?)
  4. If he insists on sleeping over or having sex before marriage, then you are gone (he is being led by his flesh, not by God’s spirit.)
  5. If he does not show love or respect towards you, then you are gone. (if he can not love or respect you now, marriage is not a magic fix)
  6. I am all for marriage (but I am not willing to say anything to warn you because divorce is excruciating, I know.)
  7. I am not saying your boyfriend is not worthy of getting to know better, but I need to let you know his intentions might be selfish, but you will need to figure that out for yourself.
God knows what is best for you, Heather. I also think that in your heart, you know if your boyfriend is in your best interest or not. Do not feel that you will be alone for the rest of your life if you lose him, but if he is not best for you, you will be dodging a bullet that you will be thankful that you did.
Proverbs 3:5-6 Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways, submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.
The bottom line, we do not have a crystal ball or can foresee the future, so a part of this situation needs the test of time. God has a plan for your life, and if your boyfriend is a part of the plan, you will know because it will feel right and match up with God’s will for your life. Keep in mind that you are in control of your relationship with your boyfriend. Be wise.
If he is worthy of you, you will clearly see that, and if he is not worthy of you, you will also see that which is what you possibly taste right now, it seems. If you love yourself enough and love him too, you will invest the time you need to get to know one another better. Do not rush into marriage. Give it at the very least one and a half years to get to know one another and see how well you work together as a couple.
I would also suggest seeking a Christian couple to help the two of you walk through things that have already gone through dating and marriage (you do not have to reinvent the wheel). You can learn from others who God puts in your life.
Here is a general page about dating. I think you will find it helpful. https://needencouragement.com/dating-related/
If what I have shared with you has been helpful, please email me back if I can be more of a help to you.
May God bless you and give you peace and wisdom,

Bill Greguska

 

James 1:5 If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.

Subject: I am under spiritual attack
Message Body:
I have sinned since being saved I drank too much and I have stopped completely now for 2 months I just feel pressure and I don’t know what to do the devil is ever-present.
Frank
Hi Frank,
Congratulations!!! I, too, had a problem with alcohol and also drugs when I was younger. I remember the first month was the hardest for me. I stuck with it and put God as my highest priority, and He put the people I needed to help me in my path. I have been clean and sober since June 25, 1986, after drugs and alcohol did great damage in my life from the time I was 16 until I was 26. I am glad you reached out for some assistance. Remember that our recovery and our walk with the Lord is not a solo endeavor. We need God and one another.
  1. Do you pray each morning when you wake up? https://needencouragement.com/how-to-pray/
  2. Do you read your Bible?  https://needencouragement.com/how-to-read-the-bible/
  3. Are you attending a church right now? https://needencouragement.com/find-a-good-church/
  4. Are you involved in a support type of group for your addiction? https://needencouragement.com/my-drug-and-alcohol-problem/
  5. Do you have someone keeping you accountable? https://needencouragement.com/accountability-partner/
  6. Are you taking care of your health, diet, exercise, sleep, avoiding stress? https://needencouragement.com/healthy-food/
  7. Do you have any unconfessed sin in your life? https://needencouragement.com/list-of-sins/
  8. Do you need to forgive someone who has harmed you in any way? https://needencouragement.com/how-to-forgive/
These questions will help you take some of the pressure off from the spiritual attacks you are having. Remember that:
Ephesians 6:10-18 Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. 11 Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. 12 For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. 13 Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. 14 Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, 15 and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. 16 In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. 17 Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.18 And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the Lord’s people.
If what I have shared with you has been of help, please feel free to email me back if you have any questions about what I have said. I pray right now that you keep your eyes on the Lord and get into His word and pray each day. Avoid people and places that might set you off to drink again. An ounce of prevention is better than a pound of cure!
God bless you,
Bill Greguska
Proverbs 29:25 Fear of man will prove to be a snare, but whoever trusts in the Lord is kept safe.

—–Original Message—–

Subject: Cost
Message Body:
Do your services cost anything? Joe
Good morning Joe,
Thank you for your inquiry. Our website ministry does not cost anything. We have pages of information in the form of links, videos, and text that will help you in the areas of life that you or someone you know is struggling with.
Take some time to look through to see what can be of help to you. If you have any more questions, feel free to contact us again.
May God bless you and keep you strong!

Bill Greguska


—–Original Message—–

Subject: Overcoming fear
Message Body:

Hey, so I’m working on overcoming overthinking, fear of the future, and being positive, and I saw on here where it says fear of the Lord is good, but what does that mean? That scares me.

Stephanie

Hi Stephanie,
Thanks for contacting us, and your question is a good one. I could say that the Scripture says the fear of God is the beginning of wisdom, and wisdom is to depart from evil. That means we must avoid evil or anything that lures us to do evil or wickedness.
Here is a 2-minute video that can explain what is meant by the fear of the Lord. https://youtu.be/kd8RGuetrBA
I have been a Christian for some years, and one of my strengths has always has been not to be afraid to ask a question about something I am not sure about, just like you did with your inquiry about the fear of the Lord. If you do not have a church and are interested in finding a Bible-believing church in your area, visit this link…https://needencouragement.com/find-a-good-church/. You can get many of your questions answered in the church by the pastor and fellowship with others.
It is wonderful that you are overcoming overthinking, fear of the future, and being positive. One scripture that comes to mind first would be Proverbs 3:5-6 Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways, submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.
One more that might be of help to you would be James 1:5. If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.
I hope what I have shared with the scriptures and what I wrote, and also the video has been able to answer your question for you. If it has, and you have any other questions, feel free to email me back. Also, here is an excellent website called GodQuestions.org that can answer many more questions for you. It is apparent that you are seeking truth and trying to improve your life, which is fantastic!
May God bless you and reveal Himself to you more and more each day!
Bill Greguska



—–Original Message—–

Subject: My friend is ashamed
Message Body:
Hi, my name is Hannah. My best friend recently sends nudes to a guy who she liked. He pressured her continually to send them, caved under, and feeling dirty and ashamed. She is not a Christian, and honestly, I don’t know if I am either. I was raised Christian, and God had taken away some shame I’ve felt about sin I’ve done in the past, but I feel so bad for her and wish I could take all her pain away. It makes me so sad because she’s so insecure about her body, and I love her so much and want to help her, but I don’t know-how. I suggest she forgive herself, but she says she can’t, which I know can’t happen in just one day. What should I do? Hannah
Hi Hannah,
It is kind of you to want to help your friend, although your friend needs to deal with what she did. You mentioned that she is not a Christian, and you do not think you are either. As for you, do you believe in Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior? Do you believe that He died for your sins? Do you think you are a sinner and need a Savior, or else you have to pay the penalty of your sin, which is death and separation from God?
Here are a useful link and video concerning forgiveness https://needencouragement.com/forgiven
As far as your girlfriend feeling guilty, that is only normal. God created us all with a conscience, and she did something that she knows was wrong.
It sounds like you want your girlfriend to get over her guilty feelings, yet if she does not have God in her life to help her, I do not know what can suggest except for you both to become Christian. If you or your girlfriend were Christians, you could trust what it says in God’s word in 1 John 1:9. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.
If either one of you wants freedom from the guilt of sin, then accepting Jesus as your Lord and Savior is what I suggest both of you do.
If what I have shared with you sounds interesting, feel free to email me back if you want more information?
I pray that the Lord touches both of your hearts and draws you near to Him!

Bill Greguska


—–Original Message—–

Subject: I need spiritual help asap
Message Body:
Hello, my name is Kevin. I’d like to meet with the pastor in person if & when that’s possible. I have to deal with a LONG struggle for almost 20 years now & see no way out & have gotten no way out up to this point. My problem is I’m wearing down tire of this curse, black cloud, bearing the cross whatever it is it’s been it’s becoming ridiculous & starting to take its toll My faith is past smaller than a mustard seed & I’m becoming VERY ANGRY with God, and yes I know that’s the last thing a person should do or that anybody wants to hear a person say!
But I am tired  & fed up with the pain & constant rain & no advancement in life no soul mate, works HARD for small amounts of money, no joy/ happiness no real friend no real-life & then thing going wrong at the same time almost 20 years this has been my story no matter how hard I work & pray nothing seems to change & now over the last few years I’ve been told I’m diabetic do to family members having it, I finally got my blood pressure down, I have high blood pressure, asthma, sleep apnea, insomnia and now depression & anxiety, going bald, etc. why does God hate me so much? I’m not sure, but I’m starting to hate him just as much!!!   
I have done nothing but do my best to be there for others, be a good-hearted person, help everyone I can when I can, even animals, but yet I have been the outcast/underdog all my life, the ugly duckling, not that I super mind it. Still, the no-pay off, no advancement, no breakthroughs, and not putting this cross down is killing me!!!
Kevin
Hi Kevin,
I am glad you decided to reach out. First of all, I am not a pastor, but I am a Christian that has walked a road similar to yours. Now that the churches are opening up, I would suggest that you find a church to go to so you can hear God’s Word. Here is a link that will be able to help you find a church in your area. https://needencouragement.com/find-a-good-church/
In the meantime, I strongly suggest that you pray and ask God for wisdom and patience. Here is a link that can help you if you need some help with prayer. https://needencouragement.com/how-to-pray/
James 1:5If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.
You and I do not have a crystal ball to know why things have happened in your life and my life the way that they have. So that is why I suggest that you take all the concerns you have and give them over to God and let him direct you. Having a pastor and church to attend and a pastor learn from and lean on will help you.
An excellent friend of mine emailed me this video below, which I am sure you will benefit from.
Kevin, if what I have shared has been some help to you, feel free to email me back if you would like to.
May God Bless you and make Himself more known to you!
Bill Greguska

1-800-633-3446


—–Original Message—–

Subject: Did God’s sovereignty intend for my believing husband to commit adultery for two years?
Message Body:
John, I am 68 years old, a believer since the age of 9, and married for 46 years, trying very hard to apply the whole concept of sovereignty, which was not taught to me, to my personal story. My born-again husband, and professional Christian counselor, committed adultery for over two years. Words could never describe the total and complete shock and pain I have dealt with, nor the redeeming grace and mercy of our ABBA in bringing forgiveness, healing, and restoration to our marriage. My husband has been genuinely repentant, broken, and changed forever.
But when I study the whole concept of sovereignty, such as in Joseph’s life, does that apply to my story? Did God INTEND  for my husband to turn his heart against God, break his covenant of marriage, betray all he knew to be true and right, lose his career and ministry at the age of 70 because somehow God meant it for good? I can see where God has redeemed and uses it for good, but I can not accept that God ORCHESTRATED this. Please help me understand. – Kathy
Hi Kathy,
I am sorry to hear what has happened. At the same time, I am glad that your husband has repented and the two of you have restored your marriage. Praise God!
I would disagree with what you mentioned that God orchestrated the adultery to happen, but instead, I will say that God allowed it to happen since He gives us free will to choose good over evil. Your husband (no matter the fact that your husband was a professional Christian counselor) is still a sinner, just like you and I are sinners that God has saved by the sacrifice of His Son Jesus Christ.
I found some information from a website that I trust a lot that hopefully will give you some insight into God’s sovereignty.
You are a good wife to forgive your husband’s foolishness and sin. According to the Bible, you have grounds for divorce, but God hates divorce, so I say to you that you are a good wife and your husband wise to repent from his sin.
Matthew 6:15 But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.
Yes, I am sure this is not what you had planned to happen, but it did, and we all need to realize that our flesh is weak, and we need to stay close to God in prayer, Bible reading, fellowship, confession, repentance.

Mark 14:38 Watch and pray so that you will not fall into temptation. The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak.”

Since your husband has a spirit of repentance, you both need to come together, put all pride aside, and pick up the pieces of your marriage and use it as a testimony to those that know you as a witness to the love that God has for both of you and each other.
Luke 11:4 Forgive us our sins, for we also forgive everyone who sins against us. And lead us not into temptation.’”
I pray that you can put this behind you and not let Satan tempt you to have it recalled to your memory. You will probably need to do as it says in 1 Peter 5:7 Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. I pray that is set back will be only that, a setback and that you and your husband of 46 years, with God’s grace and mercy, will strengthen you to continue to move forward in marriage vows.
If what I have shared with you has been of help, feel free to contact me back via email.
May God bless you and strengthen you with His grace and wisdom!

Bill Greguska

 


—–Original Message—–

Subject:
Message Body:
yeah, I’m looking for counseling but unable to fill out the counseling call back form via a focus on the family. I’m in Canada so do I just keep looking on google cause I have been doing that on and off for like three years tried to reach out to a few but no luck, so any help. Jared
Hi Jared,
I am sorry to hear you are struggling to get a counselor. Did you consider contacting your pastor? Maybe he could sit down and talk with you? If you do not have a pastor or church, here is a link to find a good Bible-believing church in your area. https://needencouragement.com/find-a-good-church/
Also, here is a phone number. They are not counselors, but they are Christian, and their ministry makes phone conversations. The ministry is called Need Him. The phone number is 800-633-3446
I am not sure why Focus on the Family was not able to communicate with you?
Since you seem to need someone to talk with, let me ask you if you have taken your problems to God recently?
If you need to bounce something off of me, and what I have said has been of some help to you, feel free to email me back, and maybe I can be of some help to you?
God bless you and trust Him to comfort you and give you wisdom.

 

Proverbs 30:5 “Every word of God is flawless; he is a shield to those who take refuge in him.

Bill Greguska


—–Original Message—–

Subject: I AM HURTING AND NEED LOVE
Message Body:
I NEED SUPPORT AND PEOPLE TO LOVE ME AND I NEED PEOPLE TO LOVE ME PRAY FOR MY MONEY NEEDS TO BE MET AND PRAY FOR ME NOT TO BE ALL ALONE AND THANKS FOR BEING A FRIEND AND PRAY FOR PEOPLE TO BE AROUND ME THANKS. CHRISTY
Hi Christy,
It sounds like you are in a storm right now. The first thing I would suggest is to stop right now and pray to God. Tell Him what you are going through, and ask Him to give you the wisdom you need to get through this time. James 1:5 If anyone f you lack wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously without finding fault, and it will be given to you.
The next thing I would suggest is to contact your pastor and ask him for help. If you do not have your own church, check out this link to find a good Bible-believing church for yourself in your area, which will not only expose you to God’s word but will supply the fellowship you seem to need. https://needencouragement.com/find-a-good-church/
For your physical need for money, I would suggest calling 211 and talking to someone there to help you with that need. You can also call
800-633-3446
Lord, I pray right now that Christy can find comfort in you and your word. I pray that you could draw some good people into her life. I also pray for Christy’s financial needs. Lord, you love Christy, and you will not leave her or forsake her, give her patience to trust you, Lord, for ALL of her needs!
If what I have shared with you has been of help to you, please email me back if you have anything else on your mind that I can help you with. BUT make sure you pray and ask God to give you the wisdom and direction that you need.
May God bless you and comfort you during this time you are going through.

Bill Greguska


Subject: Need to speak to someone I am troubled
Message Body:
I was sexually assaulted and need to speak to someone on how to move forward and just cope.
Nicky
Hi Nicky,
It is a little hard for me to mention this, but if you did get pregnant, I pray that you keep your child. There are places that can help you bring the child (if you are pregnant) and walk with you along the path. Have you reported this to the police yet? Or is there fear involved in doing so?
Here are a couple of pro-life links that will give you comfort and guidance.
Please get some support for yourself, and at the same time, keep in mind that if you do get pregnant, you will love and cherish your little one, and God and His people will help you along the way. This is my prayer for you!
Please feel free to keep in touch if you need more help.
I mentioned them because they can help walk you through this situation, but I should have looked a little closer into their site, which I just did, and I need to make you aware that they might want to lead you to get an abortion, which I highly do not recommend. So please look at the links above that I shared with you just now. Also, I have a link on my site called.
https://needencouragement.com/abortion-remorse/ This link will give you a reality check about what happens to the women who do get abortions. I pray first of all that you are not pregnant, and second of all, if you are pregnant, that you will carry it out to full pregnancy, have and keep your child, and if you feel you can not raise your child, then adoption is the loving option.
I pray that God’s loving arms are felt by you right now!
Bill Greguska

 

Hi, thank you I asked so many people everybody is directing me to someone else,  but thank you.

Nicky
Hi Nicky,
I am so sorry that this has happened to you, but I am glad you choose to reach out for help. I would suggest that you call 800-656-HOPE (4673)  or online chat https://hotline.rainn.org/online and also contact their website below for the information that can help you.

This would be my best advice besides thanking God that you are okay, ask God to give you the wisdom to know what to do now. I pray for you, and I know that as you trust God, He will direct your path.
Proverbs 3:5-6 Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.

May God bless you as He walks with you through what you have experienced.
Bill Greguska

—–Original Message—–

Subject: Church gossip?
Message Body:
I am becoming increasingly frustrated with my church; it’s a Baptist Church. I genuinely love everyone in the church, but it is clear many members in my small church disapprove of me. They are very caring towards my son, and that’s wonderful, but I feel if I didn’t attend at all and only he went, they would be ok with that. I have noticed the women will take turns reaching out to me as a friend, and I will talk openly and honestly, and then much of what I say is then in my pastor’s sermon the next week. Then the friend stops talking to me for an extended period.
I know several members think I am not properly saved. I was asked to tell my story by the pastor’s wife, how I got saved, and the pastor mentioned in his sermon several times since those elements in my story are not how God works with me, though. I leave church feeling like garbage 60% of the time.  One woman snaps at me over the most straightforward statements. I was shunned for about two weeks until I approached someone and asked what I had done? Why was everyone ignoring me? She told me it wasn’t me And not to worry about it.
Is this how the church is? Is this how God works?  I thought I would find a community where otherwise, I have no one in the area I moved to. I have been attending the church for a year. I have made every effort to ” be good” I am afraid to talk to anyone about what is going on with me because it will end up in a sermon it’s a small church. If they’re telling the pastor, does everyone sitting around me know! And I’m just sat there like a fool! I believe that Jesus loves me and cares for me, but I don’t think there’s a place for me among his people.
Thank you
Beth H
Hi Beth,
I have coined an expression for what you are talking about in your email. “People are people.” I am assuming that you are sensitive like I am. It is regrettable that those who call themselves Christians and behave in such away. Remember that we as Christians need to try to be more and more like Jesus, but unfortunately, everyone is different in their faith walk.
You are feeling 60% like garbage because it has not been resolved. You need to take some pro-active steps starting with prayer!!!
You are right without a doubt that Jesus loves you and cares for you, probably more than you even realize. It sounds like you are asking me for my advice. I will give it to you, but please pray about what I say before you do anything.
  1. One of my concerns is for your spiritual heart not to become hardened, Matthew 6:15, But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.
  2. My advice to you is to pray about this each day, asking God for His wisdom and insight into what is happening, and if there is anything on your part, you could find something you need to address with God.
  3. Pray for those “Christians” who have been making your life more complicated than it needs to be. When we pray for someone, God hears our prayers and will intervene, remember that the Lord is the Best Defence Attorney that there is!
  4. Go to your pastor to inform him of what is going on. Maybe he can do something to help you? Perhaps he would allow you to address the church on a Sunday?
  5. Romans 12:18If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. Do not allow your hurt feeling to cripple you.
  6. After doing all you can do to make peace with your church, and there is no improvement in the situation, there is the option to confront each of those people peacefully. 
  7. The idea is to stay at your church, but leaving is an option if that is not possible. Make sure no matter what, if you decide to leave, I will make sure that the pastor knows what happened and leave peacefully if all you have tried fails. Also, you do not loan your lips to the devil and slander anyone. Just speak the truth in love.
  8. James 1:5If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.
  9. If what I have shared has been helpful, please email me back if you think it would help.
  10. I pray that you will be able to resolve this situation and no matter what, you will be a better person for doing so.
May God bless you and give you wisdom and peace!

Bill Greguska


—–Original Message—–
Subject: Help
Message Body:
Hi my name is Joseph I’ve been praying for me and my ex-girlfriend Victoria to get back together ever since December and now she’s with someone I’m still in love with her she’s everything to me I feel lost without her I know I have God on my side I believe in God I believe in Jesus and I have my faith in God and Jesus and it’s strong I pray to them every single day I wear my crosses please pray for us to get back together.
I pray to God for him to reconcile mine and his relationship I pray that he helps me through things he has granted me my prayers before he has answered them before that helps me with my faith of thinking about the things he’s answered for me I know that this is a big one for him to answer for her and me to work this out she’s everything to me also I handed things over to God I pray to him to take us things over I don’t know if I pray to him in the right way for him to take everything over is there a certain way that I have to pray headed to take my worries over. 
Joseph
Hi Joseph,

Things do happen, and the ball is in her court now to decide what she is willing or not willing to do. I have been where you are, and the sound advice is what I already gave you in the other email. Here are a couple of scriptures and some more information to be of help to you.
1 Peter 5:7Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.


Proverbs 3:5-6 Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways, submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.
Hopefully, she will forgive you and be willing to work things out, but if she is ready to forgive you but not willing to take you back, that is possibly the other scenario.
Please do yourself a favor, and take care of “Joseph” right now. Concentrate on what the Serenity prayer says:
God grant me the serenity to accept the things I can not change,
Courage to change the things I can,
And the wisdom to know the difference.
In addition to the serenity prayer, here are a few more ideas to focus on.
  1. Focus on your relationship with God
  2. Focus on your other friendships
  3. Focus on your job
  4. Keep an open palm with Victoria. If the Lord puts her back with you or not, be open to His Will.
  5. Make sure you get some exercise to combat the stress in life.
  6. Find things that you enjoy, and do them.
  7. Make sure you eat healthy foods.
  8. Make sure you avoid alcohol and drugs.
  9. Be sure to get enough sleep each night, 7-8 hours.
  10. Stop obsessing about Victoria (attempt to write her a letter or call her to determine if she wants you back or not)
  11. Let all the results be determined in God’s timing and His Will, not yours.
You will be alright. Just keep calm and level-headed with your eyes on the Lord, not Victoria!

Bill Greguska

—–Original Message—–

Subject: Re: “Help”

We broke up because I had a mental breakdown, and I took everything out on her. It was a day back in October I was being overworked with my job. I was depressed because she was no longer living with me due to my brother’s wife’s issues, and she said something to me. I forget what it was, and everything just came out, and I took it out on her, and I never meant it. I never wanted to break up with her.
I had a mental breakdown, and I had everything from her. When I see her walking somewhere, she stares at me. When I see her walking alone, she never looks happy; she always looks miserable. We broke up. After all, I did it by accident because I had a mental breakdown, and I never told her what was going on. I should have in my heart. I believe that she and I are getting back together in my heart. I think that we can work this out. I know she still loves me the way that she looks at me when she’s walking. I asked God for signs. There are things I see after I asked him for signs. I had visions of me and her getting back together, visions of me and her having a family together. I pray every single day for us. I know she’s the one.
I know I feel, and I believe that she and I are not done yet. I think that our story together is not over after I accidentally broke up with her. She was contacting me up until about two weeks before Christmas, and because of everything going on with me, I shut down, but she still talks to my family is. She still asks my family about me. I know my heart, and I believe she’s the one I have tried to move on, and I cannot. Something stops me tells me it’s wrong. I am genuinely in love with her with all my heart, and I believe that we will work this that we are going to get back together. I just need prayers for her and me to work this out.
I need a miracle prayer for her and me to get back together. I know we’re meant to be the first time I saw her. I knew that she was the one I fell in love with her the first time I saw her. I remember exactly what she was wearing and what she was doing when I saw her for the first time, stores I can’t go into because I get too emotional because that was where me and her went. I enjoy fishing. I stopped going fishing. That was our thing. Some things just seem wrong for me to be doing without her I need a miracle prayer for her, and I get back together with you. Please give me a miracle prayer, please.
Hi Joseph,
I am sorry to hear that you are struggling with this past relationship issue. You say that you have been praying about your situation, what do you hear God prompting you to do? It is apparent that you still have deep feelings towards Victoria. There must have been a reason why you guys broke up, and until that is resolved, there is probably not much that you can do. It has been almost seven months, and it might be time to either talk with her about your feeling or move on with your life.
Sometimes God allows a door to be closed, but it always seems that He has another door ever better to be opened. God will help you through this situation by either allowing the two of you to talk things out, or help you move past her.
In the meantime, keep praying to find GOD’S will rather than focusing on your own will. I can understand that it is hard, but there is a good chance that she has moved on obviously with a new boyfriend. That does not mean you can not talk to her one more time to attempt to resolve things, but after hearing her wishes, you need to respect whatever she wants.
If you do get to talk with Victoria, MAKE SURE YOU TALK LIKE A GENTLEMAN, AND ALLOW VICTORIA TO SPEAK, AND DO NOT ARGUE, OR BECOME UNRULY, IF YOU DO NOT THINK YOU CAN DO THAT, THEN BETTER LEAVE WELL ENOUGH ALONE.
There are many fish in the ocean, and I pray that the Lord will open the right door for you. Until then, keep walking close to God each day, reading your Bible, praying, and trying to do His Will.
If what I have shared with you has been helpful, feel free to email me back if you have anything else you would like to discuss. No matter what you decide to do, or what happens, I wish you all the best and I pray you grow closer to God because of what you decide.
God bless you,
Bill Greguska

—–Original Message—–

Subject: Advice
Message Body:
My question is, how will son and father be able to keep a bond with God. When I was younger, I had a kid, and I didn’t understand many things. Still to this day, I get confused. But I never got my child circumcised, and now I read the bible and know plenty of mistakes on how to go about this situation. God bless.
Alley
Hi Alley,
It sounds like you are on the right path in life since you said you are reading God’s word! None of us are perfect. That is why we need a savior in Jesus Christ. Do not worry about having all your questions answered today. A relationship with God is an everyday thing that will last until we are taken home to heaven by God, then we will be with Him for eternity.
As far as your question about circumcision, here is what the Bible says about it in 1 Corinthians 7:19, Circumcision is nothing, and uncircumcision is nothing. Keeping God’s commands is what counts.
I hope what I have shared has been helpful to you. If it has another question, feel free to email me back, or you can go to GotQuestions.org, and they have a wealth of wisdom and Christian information that can help you in your walk with the Lord.
Here is a link that I think will be of help to you. https://needencouragement.com/good-works/
God bless you as you keep growing closer to Him!

Bill Greguska




—–Original Message—–

Subject: Update on Question regarding Adultery

Hi Mr. Greguska,
I have to be honest with you. I do not have a friend who her husband has cheated on. I am the Wife that has been cheated on.
I really need someone to talk to. I made a decision not to tell Family and Friends. It would just become a source of gossip and condemnation.
There are other aspects of our lives we have to deal with.
Thanks, Lisa
Hi Lisa,
My advice is still the same.
  1. Pray.
  2. Get a pastor or counselor to get involved.
  3. Set boundaries.
  4. Have your husband regain trust.
  5. Work things out.
It sounds like you do not trust your husband, and I can understand that.
If you would approach him requesting that he does not see that woman anymore, what would he say?
Is there any reason that your husband needs to be around her? Employee or?
If you do not trust that he would not get angry or verbally / physically aggressive towards you, then for sure you need a pastor or counselor to help you!
What I have already mentioned, you might want to re-read and think about. It is hard to give you much more advice not knowing more details, but I think I have shared the truth with you for you to be able to make up your mind on the next step you need to take.
It is unfortunate to hear what you are dealing with, many women would get a divorce, but you love him despite his unfaithfulness. Yes, healing is possible, but not if the sore keeps being pulled off by your husband and girlfriend. If your husband will not cooperate and insists on still spending time with her, he is not committed to you and your marriage.
I am against divorce, but if your husband is not willing to take any steps to regain trust, your options are cut.
BOTTOM LINE: PLEASE GET A PASTOR OR COUNSELOR INVOLVED ASAP.
I can only coach you to a degree, but you need a third person to negotiate between you and your husband. It is not a lost cause if you become proactive and get someone to help you guys!
  1. You did not tell me, or did I ask if your husband said he was sorry for what he did?
  2. Have you forgiven your husband?
  3. Have you been talking about the incident since it happened?
  4. When you ask him why he needs to spend time with this woman, what does he say?

Matthew 6:14-15 For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you.  But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.

I pray that God gives you wisdom and courage to do what God wants you to do about this. When you pray, what do you hear God saying to you?
Here is a phone number you can call 800-633-3446 (if you do not get an answer right away, try again later)

Bill Greguska


—–Original Message—–

Subject: Step Parent
Message Body:
I’m dealing with a step Parent that I have to live with no other choice. I realize my stepfather might not be happy I’m there, but life happens. Anyway, he’s always talking down to me as an adult and me. Though I live with my parents, I try hard to respect them. But the constant berating makes it hard to respect him, and when I bring it up to him, I’m somehow to blame.
He gets mad at me and demands I respect him. I tried to turn the other cheek and love him, but that only made the situation worse. I’m trying to recover from drug addiction and realize I have trauma I haven’t dealt with healthily. I opened up my hurts to God, and I feel vulnerable. What am I to do, and please pray for me? – Jerry
Hi Jerry,
Thanks for reaching out. I know that dealing with parents or step-parents can be challenging at times. When my 80-year-old mother got remarried, I had an angry stepdad. His personality went from mad to happy more often than you could believe, but usually, he was furious. I put up with him because my mom loved him, and I loved my mom. I pray that God gives you the wisdom to know how to handle things better than you have been. Here is a brainstorming list of things that might be of help to you.
Look these ideas over and try to implement as many as you can.
  1. Offer to help him around the house.
  2. Step aside when you see that he is getting on you.
  3. Ask to set up a time where your house members can all talk with the TV off and open to finding solutions.
  4. Please do all you can not let him push your buttons.
  5. Ask him to clarify what he wants out of you.
  6. Do not raise your voice or get an attitude.
  7. The things he is yelling at you about, can you do anything about it?
  8. If you can do something, then do it.
  9. Write down on paper what you think he is trying to say to you and share it with him;
  10. If he is upset about your drug and alcohol abuse, I can understand, but what are you doing to help yourself?
  11. What does your mom have to say about all of this? Can she be a peacemaker between you and your stepdad?
  12. Take some time to think if what your stepdad is complaining about if there is any truth to it?
  13. I am not sure of your age, but have you considered moving out?
  14. Are you paying any money to live at your parent’s house?
Jerry, if what I have shared with you has been of help, please feel free to contact me back, and maybe I can be more helpful to you? I am praying for you.
May God bless you and give you wisdom and patience,

Bill Greguska


Subject: Relationship
Message Body:
Hello, I’m having doubts even though engaged to be married in six months please get back to me. I need to speak to a believer about my situation.
Josette
Hi Josette,

I am thankful that you have been praying about it. It is nice to get people’s advice, but it is always best to ask God what He wanted in your relationship. You said you have talked about abstaining from sex until you get married. He has agreed, but remember what it says in Matthew 26:41 “Watch and pray so that you will not fall into temptation. The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak.” (If you are totally honest about it, you know it is going to be extremely hard for the two of you to obtain if you are still living together which is what I am assuming).
Lord willing that the two of you can work out all your issues, and you do plan to get married in 6 months to a year, you might strongly consider moving into your parent’s house for at least 3-6 months while you and your boyfriend continue to date without any sex before you decide to get married. I guess that he would not like this idea, but it would be a test to see if he really loves you or what?
Josette, in a nutshell, both you and your boyfriend need to decide who you will serve? It is pretty simple and straightforward as it says in Joshua 24:15 But if serving the Lord seems undesirable to you, then choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve, But as for me and my household, we will serve the Lord.”
It’s just the excessive drink that bothers me, which I have talked to him about, will do soon.
If you were my daughter, I would be concerned about his drinking too. You might want to make it a condition that he stops drinking for at least 6 months to a year before you would consider marrying him. If he chooses alcohol over you, you will know where his heart is at. If he takes your warning seriously, then he might be worth marrying. I am sorry that you are in this position, but you need to be wise and stand firm now because once a person gets married, the real person comes out. I am sure you would not want someone who is a practicing alcoholic as a husband and ended up in a divorce that you have been given a warning to ahead of time by myself and others you have talked with.
I am very seriously talking to you because marriage is a solemn institution that takes a great deal of teamwork between husband and wife and God.
I might be wrong, but it sounds like you are locked in since you are already living with him, and to move out would be a big ordeal. But I am warning you. It is better to have his cards and all your cards on the table with him now, rather than ending up in divorce court.
Pray to God each day this week about it. If you get a clear answer from God, great! If you do not get a clear answer, then keep praying.
I strongly believe that many couples invest more time buying a car, computer, etc., than they do getting ready for a marriage, which is why the divorce rate is so very high. Please avoid being a statistic. As I mentioned, I was divorced, and it was the worst thing that ever happened to me. Please take my word in what I am sharing with you. It is better to stand firm and stand-alone rather than become yoked with someone you are not sure where to lead you. You have the time now to think, pray and wrestle with all these things. Believe me. Divorce leaves an ugly permanent scar. I have been divorced for 14 years, and I know what I am talking about. I do not want you to say yes to marriage because of convenience or compromise. You need to go into a marriage with both eyes opened wide.
Bill Greguska

NeedEncouragement.com

God made it very simple and clear for us…
He gave us two basic things to remember!

Matthew 22:37-39 Jesus replied: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’

 

 

 

Thanks, I have been praying about it but have never thought to ask God what He wanted my relationship to be like, so thanks for that. I have talked about abstaining from sex until we get married, and he has agreed because that one I’m not compromising. It’s just the excessive drink that bothers me, which I have talked to him about, will do soon. 
Thank you, and God bless you.
Josette
Hi Josette,
I am glad that you have reached out. I have an advantage over you in this situation because I can see things more objectively compared to you since you have 6 years invested in him. So let me start by giving you a shortlist of things to consider.
  1. Have you prayed to God about this? If not, that is where to begin. https://needencouragement.com/how-to-pray/
  2. Do not think you are going to change him. That is not your job, and you will possibly be very disappointed and angry.
  3. Pray about what God wants in your relationship to look like, and use that as your goal.
  4. If your boyfriend is not looking out for your mutual best interest, then you need to even though he is supposed to be the leader.
  5. Have you talked to your boyfriend about this? I would write out a few things to guide the conversation.
  6. When you have prayed and thought about your boundaries with your boyfriend, share them with him and see if he agrees? https://needencouragement.com/set-boundaries/
  7. If he is totally against what you are proposing to conduct your relationship, that might be a flag for you to move on possibly.
  8. I have been married and divorced, and I wish our pastor asked more questions before getting married. If so, I might not have married her, and in turn, not divorced.https://needencouragement.com/prevent-divorce/
Proverbs 3:5-6 Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways, submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.
If what I have shared with you, and if you have any questions about what I said, please feel free to email me back if you have more questions.
God bless you,
Bill Greguska
Hello Bill,
My story is long, but I will try to summarize it. So I have been dating this amazing guy for 6 years and engaged for almost two years to be married in 6months. We both grow up in a Christian household, but I decided to follow Jesus two years ago. However, it was tough for me to leave my past life, like sex before marriage, not being truly transparent with the guy, and everything else. One year ago, I started seeing the changes in me as I started reading the bible and talking to fellow Christians. When this happened, his drinking habits ( anytime he is not at work) started bothering him and me wanting sex and not talking about the Word with him. I’m scared that what if this continues when we get married where he is just drunk all the time and can’t talk about God with him! But my other thought is that what if I’m judging him? God who changed me can change him as well to produce good fruits in him. Plus, someone told me that God was going to use me to change my family. What if he is my family that God told me about? I’m so conflicted. He goes to church and all other religious things, but I want a marriage of Ephesians 5 and someone who takes instructions from the Lord Himself.
Sorry for the long email, and thanks for any response. And pray for me as well.
Josette

Hi Josette,

It is very wise that you have reached out for advice about the second most significant decision you will make. Only your decision to accept Jesus as your Lord and Savior are bigger!
Since we do not do phone calls, you can email me to describe what you are thinking and feeling and why you are concerned. I will encourage you and give you  Christian advice to help you make up your mind for yourself.
Bill Greguska
Wow, that was great advice. Thank you so much, and I’m so sorry to hear about your divorce.
I will do as you say to ask him to stop, and hopefully, he sees where I’m coming from.
I also don’t live with him; I never have. I just made the mistake of sleeping with him before marriage, but I won’t anymore (we are both in two different countries).
And thank you for your advice on praying. I’m praying this whole week and fasting probably until God answers me.
Thank you so much
Josette

Hi Sampath,
You say that you are from India, although you did not mention anything about having faith in Jesus Christ. The only help I can point you to is that of Jesus Christ being your Lord and Savior before I believe you can have any real, lasting success in battling Pornography.
1 John 1:9If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.
Here are a couple of links that will get you started in your recovery.
Here is a phone number you can call to talk with a Christian who can help you. 800-633-3446
Sampath, I pray that God gives you the strength and self-control to gain some small victories in your battle against pornography. You need to want help and be willing to follow the Lord in this effort. Stay away from all temptations that drag you down. You can have victory, but remember that it will be a battle for you, but all things are possible with God. I pray that God gives you the grace you need. If what I have shared with you has been of help, please email me if you have any questions I might be able to help you with.
God bless you,

Bill Greguska



—–Original Message—–

Subject: Pornography
Message Body:
Hi, dear team. I am Sampath from India, struggling with pornography addiction past couple of years. I need specific counseling to commit, and I need to please God with my body and soul, and I need someone to confess my sin, and I need someone to help overcome my addiction.

Hi Candice,
Thank you for reaching out to us. Our ministry uses communication via email only, so please let me know what is on your mind?
To briefly respond to your concern about unforgiveness. God sent his Son to pay for our sins. Having faith in God, we are covered by the sacrifice that He made for us.
John 3:16For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall
not perish but have eternal life.
Candice, you say that you feel like you have done something that even God can’t forgive. The only thing that I am aware of that is unforgivable mentioned in the Bible is blasphemy.
“Blasphemy against the Holy Spirit” is conscious and hardened opposition to the truth, “because the Spirit is truth” (1 John 5:6). Conscious and hardened resistance to the truth leads man away from humility and repentance, and without repentance, there can be no forgiveness.
In a religious sense, blasphemy refers to great disrespect shown to God or something holy, or something said or done that shows this kind of disrespect; heresy refers to a belief or opinion that does not agree with the official belief opinion of a particular religion. Both words are also sometimes used in general, not necessarily religious, contexts.
Matthew 12:31 And so I tell you, every kind of sin and slander can be forgiven, but the blasphemy against the Spirit will not be forgiven.
It would be very extreme if your heart were so icy that you would blasphemy the Holy Spirit. We all sin against God regularly. That is one of the biggest things about having a relationship with Jesus Christ as our Lord and Savior.
About blasphemy, only you and God know for sure. Still, I would guess that you are under condemnation for some sin you have committed or are committing that you did not confess to God about, and Satan is working hard to destroy your relationship with God.
1 John 1:9If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.
If what I have shared has been helpful to you, please contact me back, or you can call 800-633-3446, and someone hopefully can get to you to talk. You might need to try calling several times because they are a group of volunteer Christians who try to point people to Jesus Christ and have been very busy lately.
Candice, another option is to check out this link and see if it would be of help to you.
God bless you,

Bill Greguska



—–Original Message—–

Subject: Counseling
Message Body:
Kindly please contact me. I need help during this time. I’m finding it difficult to wait on God. I feel like I’ve done something that even God can’t forgive.

Hi Mary,
I am very sorry to hear about the loss of your son’s father. As far as talking to someone on the phone, we correspond via email only in our ministry. I am sorry if you expect to talk on the phone, but that is how we are set up.
If your son has a specific question or concern, please have him contact us, and we will get back to him as quickly as possible. Does your son know the Lord as his Lord and Savior?
Are you or your son Christian? If so, I encourage you to pray and ask God for wisdom on how to handle your situation? If you are not Christian, I encourage you to look into it as soon as possible.
James 1:5 If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.
Also, this Psalm has been a comfort to me in the past.

Psalm 121:1-8  I lift my eyes to the mountains—where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth. He will not let your foot slip—he who watches over you will not slumber; indeed, he who watches over Israel will neither slumber nor sleep. The Lord watches over you—the Lord is your shade at your right hand; the sun will not harm you by day, nor the moon by night. The Lord will keep you from all harm—he will watch over your life; the Lord will watch over your coming and going both now and forevermore.

Mary, If your son wants to contact us, please encourage him to do so. In the meantime, I pray that the Lord will comfort him and direct his way. Here are a couple of links that might be of help.
God bless you and your son during this difficult time in his life. I pray for comfort from God for your son’s loss of his father.

You can call to talk with a Christian about your faith and the death of your son’s father on the phone by calling 800-633-3446




—–Original Message—–

Subject: grief counseling with a male Christian counselor
Message Body:
My husband, my son’s father, recently passed away, and he is having a challenging time with the grief. Is it possible for me to set up a phone counseling session with a male Christan counselor?
I believe if I can get it set up, he will talk with the counselor.
Is Bill Greguska available for this type of counseling?
Thanks for any assistance you can provide.

Hi Misgana,
I have found great strength and peace when I am walking with the Lord. In my life, when I have decided to take the steering wheel back from God, my life has suffered because of it. We need to submit ourselves to God and allow Him to run our lives. No longer can we afford to run our own lives.
Another thought I had, was to “KEEP IT SIMPLE” What I mean by that, it that if you are falling into sin in a certain habitual way, do not go down that road. Avoid it like the plague!!! You might still grab the steering wheel back from God, but hopefully, it will be less and less. Addiction is not easy to break, BUT it can be done, and it is so much worth it!!!
I can not say with 100% assurance that your addiction will go away today (that would be awesome if it would), but for me, it was a constant thriving to want to be free from drugs and alcohol, and sure enough, on June 25, 1986, the Lord freed me from my addictions. I struggled and fell a few times, but I kept getting back up. I prayed to God regularly, I had support, I had faith, and I was determined. Praise God that He rescued me from myself and my addictions. I know that God can do the same in your life Misgana, set your mind to do so, and keep following God!
I can say with 100% assurance that when you pray, God hears your prayers, and he will answer them, we have no crystal ball to know the time of the day, but I know for sure that God is faithful. This, I know, without a doubt!!!
Here are a couple of links that I think will be of help to you.
Keep on praying and reading your Bible. Plus, if you know someone who is a Christian and would be willing to help walk with you through this time in your life, that would be awesome! It is like being back on the playground and having someone help defend you from the bullies on the playground. We all need someone. I have a couple of Christian friends that I can go to with my problems and concerns. Sometimes just talking about it helps a lot. Other times, getting feedback helps a great deal too!
I will continue to pray for you. Please continue to seek after the Lord in prayer and trust Him to direct you in the way you ought to go and protect you! Keep trying, Misgana. You can do it, and if what I am sharing is helpful to you, feel free to email me back.

Bill Greguska

NeedEncouragement.com



Bill,

I need help in my life, for I am ashamed of telling anything bad to anyone. I am facing a problem. I know Jesus is full of mercy, but I couldn’t live a life that he deserved, I couldn’t be holy as I supposed to be, I am looking for someone to guide me to the lord of mercy and someone to tell about all my bad habit and get help.
After I’ve read it, my life showed changing. I think I am in a good mood. as long as this addiction is with me, I won’t feel free forever, just for a few days before it comes again. Thank you so much for everything. What would you like to add?
Misgana
Good morning Misgana,
I think that you might have a misconception. We do not have to make ourselves good first before we can come to Jesus. I suggest you get your thinking straight and come to God as you are (a sinner, just like me) and let the Holy Spirit work in you. You do not need to get good first to allow God to help you.
It sounds like you admit you are not strong enough to beat this problem, that is why you need Jesus to help you right now. (not wait until you get your life cleaned up, you need Jesus now!
Please think about and pray about what I just said…and read Romans chapter 6 (the whole chapter) and, in your own words, try to tell me what it is trying to say to you.
Romans 6:6-23
Dead to Sin, Alive in Christ
6 What shall we say, then? Shall we go on sinning so that grace may increase? 2 By no means! We are those who have died to sin; how can we live in it any longer? 3 Or don’t you know that all of us who were baptized into Christ Jesus were baptized into his death? 4 We were therefore buried with him through baptism into death so that, just as Christ was raised from the dead through the glory of the Father, we too may live a new life.
5 For if we have been united with him in a death like his, we will certainly also be united with him in a resurrection like his. 6 For we know that our old self was crucified with him so that the body ruled by sin might be done away with, that we should no longer be slaves to sin— 7 because anyone who has died has been set free from sin.
8 Now, if we died with Christ, we believe that we will also live with him. 9 For we know that since Christ was raised from the dead, he cannot die again; death no longer has mastery over him. 10 The death he died, he died to sin once for all; but the life he lives, he lives to God.
11 In the same way, count yourselves dead to sin but alive to God in Christ Jesus. 12 Therefore do not let sin reign in your mortal body so that you obey its evil desires. 13 Do not offer any part of yourself to sin as an instrument of wickedness, but rather offer yourselves to God as those who have been brought from death to life; and offer every part of yourself to him as an instrument of righteousness.14 For sin shall no longer be your master because you are not under the law but grace.
15 What then? Shall we sin because we are not under the law but grace? By no means! 16 Don’t you know that when you offer yourselves to someone as obedient slaves, you are slaves of the one you obey—whether you are slaves to sin, which leads to death, or to obedience, which leads to righteousness? 17 But thanks be to God that, though you used to be slaves to sin, you have come to obey from your heart the pattern of teaching that has now claimed your allegiance. 18 You have been set free from sin and have become slaves to righteousness.
19 I am using an example from everyday life because of your human limitations. Just as you used to offer yourselves as slaves to impurity and ever-increasing wickedness, so now offer yourselves as slaves to righteousness leading to holiness. 20 When you were slaves to sin, you were free from the control of righteousness. 21 What benefit did you reap at that time from the things you are now ashamed of? Those things result in death! 22 But now that you have been set free from sin and have become slaves of God, the benefit you reap leads to holiness, and the result is eternal life. 23 For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.
Misgana, read this chapter at least twice to make sure you understand what you read, and then let me know in your own words what it is saying. Understanding this will be a good start for you to have God remove your sins, shortcomings, and addictions! Our flesh is too weak. We need God’s help!
Bill Greguska
—–Original Message—–

Subject: Re: “asking for advice.”

I do have some addiction. I want God to take away those habits from me, I tried so much by myself, but I couldn’t manage to get out. When I start living the right Christian life with holiness and being given to him, then I get tempted, and I again find myself in a thing I left. I want to go further with you if you are willing to help me.

Misgana

Hi Misgana,

We all have things we are ashamed of. It is good that you are feeling shame for whatever it may be. Romans 3:23

For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.
Do you plan to turn away from whatever sin you have been committing? In God’s word, the Bible says in1 John 1:9 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.
I have given you a couple of scriptures to think about and apply to your life. You did not say much about what you did, but you want to stop doing it, then ask God in prayer, and He will give you the strength you need to overcome whatever it is. If what I have shared with you has been helpful to you, please feel free to email me back. In the meantime, pray right now for God to help direct you and help you turn away from your sins.
800-633-3446
May God give you the wisdom and strength to help you.

Bill Greguska


Hi Hep,
Thanks for reaching out. I just want to tell you that you are not alone. Addiction to cigarettes can be challenging (yet very possible to quit, I quit back in 1988 after struggling for a couple of years).
I can tell you for sure that you need to change your thinking concerning cigarettes. They act like your friend, but they are NOT YOUR FRIEND at all.  Cigarettes will not only steal your money, but cigarettes will steal your health!
Have you prayed about your wanting to quit smoking to God? That is where I would start if I were you!
Having someone to keep you accountable is very wise, someone you must report to and talk with if you are struggling. Unfortunately, I need to be honest with you. If your addiction is powerful like mine, you might have to quit and backslide a few times before getting it right. BUT DO NOT GIVE UP. YOU CAN QUIT…
Is there some way you could move out of your home since it seems to be a terrible trigger for you! Maybe find a roommate who does not smoke and move in together. If I were trying to quit smoking again, I would not want to be around smokers at all, even if they were my own family.
Another thought is to chew sugar-free gum as much as possible, also have something like a lollypop or pen in your hand to give your hand something to focus on instead of cigarettes. Have you considered buying the nicotine patch?
Your quitting smoking partially depends on how badly you want to stop. If you think it is a good idea to stop, that most likely not be enough to do it. You have to want to quit very badly and willing to do anything to do so.
Here are a couple of links that I put together to help others quit smoking. There is a lot of useful information on these pages, good videos, and links. If what I have shared has been helpful and would like to email me back, please feel free to do so.
I pray that God takes away your craving and desire to smoke like when you were in college. Remember that with God, all things are possible. I have been cigarette-free since January 10, 1988, and I smoked between 2-3 packs a day. I have faith in God that you can quit too!!! BUT DO NOT GIVE UP. YOU CAN QUIT…
One day, one hour, one minute, one second at a time because they all add up to being cigarette-free! You can do it!!!

Bill Greguska

—–Original Message—–

Subject: Help from addiction
Message Body:
I want to be free from tobacco addiction. I tried several times,  been impatient. My problem was when I was away from home for my studies for 11 months, I was OK without having tobacco, but when I came back home after a few days, I got into the habit. The thing is because smoking is always around at home since one more member is using it. So it’s my weakness. Where will I go, where will I stay to be free? Maybe I am not strong.

Subject: How counseling works?
Message Body:
Hi, I just wanted to see how counseling works and if it is really free? Thank you so much!
Hi Giana,
I am glad you decided to reach out for help. There is no shame in doing that. It actually is a very wise choice.  To answer your question, there are three ways to get counseling:
  1. Chat unlimited. https://needhim.echoglobal.org/chat/Got_Questions
  2. Focus on the Family one-time free counseling. https://www.focusonthefamily.com/get-help/counseling-services-and-referrals/
  3. Email, by replying to this email, I can listen to your concerns and give you good advice from the Bible and from my life experiences both as a Christian that I have been since 1986 and also from lessons I learned from living in the world that I know better than doing any more. Often the conversations I have with people via email go back and forth a few times until they have a better grip on what they need to do.
Gina, it is your choice, all 3 ways are free (except #2 first counseling is free, but there is a fee for the second counseling session)

James 1:5  If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.
If you would like to ask me any questions or let me know anything so I can help you, feel free to do so. I look forward to hearing back from you.
May God bless you,
Bill Greguska

Bill,

 

Thank you so much for answering back. I tried the chat, but no one was available. I just need some encouragement and scriptures on healing from a broken relationship. 
Hi Giana,
I know it isn’t easy when a relationship ends. I have broken up with many women in my life and also one wife. It hurts, no matter if you initiated it or your partner did.
If you want to think about it, I would suggest any positive things that will come out of it. Obviously, you or your partner thought it would not work out, so if that is the case, you would just be trying to force a situation that maybe God did not want to happen. Try to be thankful for the time you had together and what he meant to you for that season in your life.
You will probably want to wait until you heal a while before considering a new relationship.
I would also suggest that you stay around people who care about you and encourage you. Make sure you eat healthy, get some exercise, get at least 7-8 hours of sleep, forgive anyone who has done you wrong, and also ask forgiveness for anyone you might have harmed in any way.

If what I have said has been of any help to you, please email me back if you have any questions about what I have said. This too shall pass, believe me!  Giana, I pray that you go to God and allow Him to comfort you during this time!
1 Peter 5:7 Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.

Bill Greguska

 

Thank you so much for this encouragement and truth!! It’s been really hard, and I felt like it was the lord we were together, and then things happened that caused us to break up, and it’s just been so hard because I have known him for so long, and I have been going to the lord with it, but I have had dreams about him, and it’s just been so sad and difficult. I thought I heard the lord on this, and maybe I did, but now it’s like the Lord wants me to trust him and surrender it again. And when I think about him and our relationship, I feel like there is hope for maybe the future, but I don’t know if it’s false hope or not. Thank you for hearing me out and for practical advice. 
Hi Giana,
Obviously, I do not know all the circumstances between you and your ex, but when you mentioned, “I Still feel like my Ex will be in my life, but I don’t want to have false hope again and try to will something that is not for me.” I feel the need to warn you that you may feel committed to do the Lord’s will, but your ex is someone you have no control over his thoughts or feelings. I say this because I fear that if you really do not want him in your life, you need to make a clean break from him.
You do not need to explain yourself to me unless you want to. I am just sharing this because I believe of your thinking, it might come back to you and bite you! (I may be wrong, and you might know what you are doing), but keep in mind that there are consequences for every decision you make, either good or not so good. I am just trying to look out for you since you are vulnerable in your emotions and thinking.
Ephesians 5:15-17Be cautious, then, how you live—not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity because the days are evil. Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the Lord’s will is.
I am sorry if I have spoken too assertively. I think you are playing with fire, keeping your ex in your life circle if, in fact, you think he is not good for you or right for you, which is why you broke up. But I encourage you to pray about this for the next few days, and I am sure the Lord will give you insight into what to do or not to do.
God bless you, and I pray that God gives you wisdom and strength!
Bill Greguska

 

The lord is continuing to speak to me through your messages. Thank you so much for this message. I have noticed the battle it has been and how the enemy looks to keep me trapped. I Still feel like my Ex will be in my life, but I don’t want to have false hope again and try something that is not for me. I am taking each day as it comes and trying my best to give it all to the lord and really cling to him. 

 

Hi Giana,
I am so glad things seem to be falling into place for you! Remember that your battle is a daily battle that you can NOT win in your own strength. You need Jesus, and you need to be in prayer daily, in your Bible daily, and fellowshipping with other believers to help strengthen you and for you to help them too.
It might benefit you to read over the emails that I corresponded with you to review them and refer to them later on. The devil is not going to be happy that you are going to the Lord for your help. You need to be on guard, for the devil is like a roaring lion waiting to devour you and me. Do not be afraid, but keep your Armor Of God on from Ephesians 6:10-18. Finally, be strong in the Lord and his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world, and the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore put on the full armor of God so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the Lord’s people.
I trust that the Lord will be watching over you, and you will be fine as long as you stay close to Him.
God bless you. Let me know if you need anything else.
Bill Greguska



This has been a huge blessing to me. Thank you for the scriptures and for the help with finding more. Lord has been so good, and something has shifted in my heart and is continuing to do something. Praise Jesus! I have been staying community and continuing to fight the battle with peace and fierceness! Thank you for your prayers. I believe the lord has been breaking through. 
Gina
Hi Giana,
Since it sounds like you broke up with him, and if you still feel you love him and can trust him, you can remain broken up, but be friends with him, and “if in time” you see him in a better light, then you can revisit the situation. It would be easier to be either in or out with him, but I would play it on the safe side if I were you. I just wanted to add this since I obviously do not know all the details.
But I can tell you that YOU are in charge no matter what you choose to do. If you were my daughter, my main concern would be for your safety, happiness, and whether or not he points you to God or away from God. Plus, if he can support you and you trust him. Keep in pray…https://needencouragement.com/how-to-pray/.
Right now, I think the answer is to keep a safe distance from him for a while and allow him to reach out to you. If he does, and you trust him to add to your life rather than subtract from your life, then you could at some point revisit things on a very elementary type of rebuilding terms.
If you have doubts that you know that you have not shared with me, then I would stick to your decision and release him from your life, but forgive him and refuse to hold a grudge or any resentments. Otherwise, you will not be free, and your next relationship will suffer because of it.
Also, be a little extra kind to yourself during this break-up time, be wise and gentle with your emotions.
Reach out to a close friend and spend some time with them. You do not have to talk about the breakup necessarily, but just spend some time with them and enjoy each other and laugh a little. Remember that laughter can be some of the best medicine, second only to prayer! Check out this page from my website. https://needencouragement.com/need-laughter/
I pray that God gives you the wisdom to make a wise decision and stick to it with no regrets. Think of it this way, if you are having problems now, if you did get married, think about how many marriages turn into divorce?

I trust that the next time you pray, that God will make His will known to you very clearly, and you follow His will…

Proverbs 3:5-6 Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways, submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.
Bill Greguska
Hi Bill, It’s been a while since I have sent an email. I have been really struggling since after my break up, and I wondered if you could send some more scriptures that talk about the healing of the heart and having faith in the lord. Thank you so much! Taking that scripture to heart. 
Gina
Hi Gina,
When you say that you have been struggling, that is not necessarily a bad thing because it means that you are still trying and have not given up if you look at it that way! I trust that you have been praying and surrounding yourself with people who care about you. It will take some time for you to heal, but it sounds like you are on the right path.
Keep yourself busy with productive things such as daily Bible reading, prayer, fellowshipping, exercise, eating healthy, sleeping 7-8 hours a night, and avoiding alcohol and drugs. Make sure you fill your day with some humor, and with all these suggestions, keep your eyes on the Lord from the time you wake up until the time you go to sleep.
Below are a few scriptures about healing that you asked me about. I pray that they speak to your heart and mind.

Psalm 147:3-4 He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds. He determines the number of the stars and calls them each by name.

Isaiah 57:18 I have seen their ways, but I will heal them; I will guide them and restore comfort to Israel’s mourners,
Jeremiah 33:6 “‘Nevertheless, I will bring health and healing to it; I will heal my people and will let them enjoy abundant peace and security.
Matthew 6:22 “The eye is the lamp of the body. If your eyes are healthy, your whole body will be full of light.
Mark 10:52 “Go,” said Jesus, “your faith has healed you.” Immediately he received his sight and followed Jesus along the road.
Lamentations 3:22-24Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. I say to myself, “The Lord is my portion; therefore I will wait for him.”
It is good that you wanted some scriptures about healing. I want to help you one step further by teaching you how to get any scripture topic that is on your mind, by merely going to Biblegateway.com and insert whatever word it may be (for you, I used the words healing and heal), which gave me a list of scriptures. Now, you will be able to look up from the Bible whatever is on your mind and in your heart to find out what God’s word says about it.
Keep on plugging away. Your healing is closer than you might realize. Remember that struggling is not a bad thing, it means that you are active in battle, and your victory is near.
I trust that the Lord is working in your life, keeping your spirit up, and keeping your eyes on the Lord. Use this breakup time as a time for healing and regrouping yourself with God’s help. Look at it as an opportunity to get to know yourself and God better, and then in God’s time, He will put the right people in your life, do not rush the process. Just go along with the prompting of the Lord! I pray that your pain will continue to lessen, and you will find a new joy in the process that God is allowing you to go through.
If what I have shared has been helpful, and if you would like to ask a question or share more, please feel free to do so.
God bless you as you walk with Him each day,
Bill Greguska
Bill,
Thank you so much!
Hi Giana,
Yes, I pray for you, and I also pray for your Ex. Here is a scripture that came to my mind when I read this email.

 

1 Peter 5:7 Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.
Now walk in God’s grace and not worry about things since you live in God’s will.
Bill Greguska
Thank you so much!! Yes, to Jesus be all the glory, I am thankful for the encouragement!  One last thing I can think of is would you pray for me and my healing but also my Ex, I have felt very worried for him, and he loves the lord, but I pray he makes wise decisions and clings to the lord in this time. I know I have to focus on what the Lord has for me, but he has been on my heart a lot. 

 

Hi Giana,
I am so happy that I could be of help to you, I understand what you are saying, but in reality, you need to thank God because He taught me through my own life experiences and His word, and also what others have shared with me, what I felt that you needed to hear.
Thank you for letting me know. That started my day on a good note! 
I pray that you too someday soon, in your own way, can encourage someone else as I have encouraged you. (through God) 2 Corinthians 1:3-4 Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God.
Giana, I am very happy for you! If you have any more questions or need to share any more, please email me back. Now get out there and do your best by doing God’s will, and you will continue to find more joy by doing so as the days go on!
One more thing to remember…ESV Matthew 10:16 “Behold, I am sending you out as sheep in the midst of wolves, so be wise as serpents and innocent as doves.
God bless you,
Bill Greguska
P.S. If you are not involved in a church right now, here is a link to help you find a good Bible-believing church in your area. https://needencouragement.com/find-a-good-church/



You have no idea how much encouragement this brought! Thank you so much for every word and advice. Thank you for the scriptures too! Thank you, Bill! 

Hi Natalie,

Life will have its ups and downs, that’s just the part of life! But as you keep your eyes on the Lord those ups and downs will not be so extreme. He will guide you in what to say and do if you follow him and trust in his word.
I may suggest to you that you focus on the things that are really important in your life and the other things that come up, say no to even though some of them may be good things. This way you’ll have more time and energy to focus on what is truly important!
God bless you!

 

Dear Mr Greguska,
Thank you for the letter “The gospel of Jesus Christ”
I`m doing my best to improve our life’s. I`m like on a roller coaster, then I sink to the bottom of despair, then I soar into the heights.
Take care of you. Best regards, Natalie

 


 

Hi Dynah,
You would benefit from praying about your situation. That would be the best thing to do because God is ultimately the one who will help you with your addiction to gambling.
Gambling is another form of idolatry, so knowing that you need to realize that you are not free but under bondage.
I would advise you to take an inventory of your life and see if any other issues might be dragging you down.
As far as a counselor for your gambling, I would not have one, but I would advise you to ask a close friend or someone you can trust to help you be an accountability partner for you.
God bless you, and I pray that you continue to seek help. Here is a link that can give you one free professional counseling session that could give you some insights.
Bill Greguska
800-633-3446
Romans 12:18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.

—–Original Message—–
Subject: Re: NeedEncouragement.com “Need Help”

Thank You for the reply.. I am in need to help strengthen my faith to the Lord as I go through this recovery process of gambling.. is there spiritual counseling that you can recommend for me? someone that I can talk to would be a great help.

God Bless You 

 

Hi Dynah,

It would be more than happy to talk with you although we do not use the phone we only use email if that’s okay with you?
Have you been taking time aside each morning to pray, and read your bible?
Have you been having any Christian fellowship at church with anyone?
Is there any unconfessed in your life that you need to ask God for forgiveness for?
Please feel free to email me back and I’ll try to respond to you as soon as possible.
1 Peter 5:7 cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you!
God bless you!



Subject: Need Help
Message Body:
Hi I’m in need of guidance on how to strengthen my faith with the Lord, is there anyone available for Christian online counseling? I feel like I’m about to lose it and need someone to talk to. God bless you!

Hi Tom,
I am very glad you have reached out for some help. That is very wise of you. Unfortunately, we have no female counselors to talk with, but I can help you if you are interested in emailing me?
Below are a couple of links that I believe will help you below.
God bless you, and I pray that you take your concerns to God.

 

 
 

 
Alcohol Links

Loneliness and Other Links



Bill Greguska
800-633-3446
Romans 12:18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.
1 Peter 5:7 Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.
 

 

—–Original Message—–

Subject: in home counseling
Message Body:
Prefer a female councilor. Struggling with drinking and companionship. I live alone with my service dog. Thank you

Hi Caleb,
It appears to me that you want to make things right with God. Praise God!!!
God will forgive you if you ask for forgiveness, and Lord willing, your wife will be gracious to you too!
1 John 1:9 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.
All you can do is to take your concerns to God in prayer.
1 Peter 5:7 Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.
It seems that you know what your situation is. The next step, as I mentioned, is to take these things to God and leave them there!
If you would like specific advice on anything, in particular, It would be good to know a little more about your situation. You did mention promiscuity and abandonment and not treating your wife the way she ought to be treated, but that still is in God’s hands first and your wife’s hands second. Please your case to God and then plead your case to your wife, do not blame her for anything. Just take YOUR responsibility in the matter. I pray that you can get back in God’s grace and the grace of your wife. I know God will forgive you, yet there might be consequences to your unfaithfulness that might take time to heal.
Feel free to contact me back if what I have shared has been helpful to you. I pray that God and your wife both see your contrite heart as I sensed you have.
Bill Greguska
800-633-3446

Romans 12:18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.

1 Peter 5:7 Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.
Caleb, I hope these scriptures and words speak to your heart and encourage you to walk with the Lord in your marriage!

—–Original Message—–

Subject: Guidance and director
Message Body:
Hello my name is Caleb and I have been a man of faith for a few years now but I seem to be at a pretty rough spot in my life and I’d like the lords wisdom and a little bit of therapy to help me grow and cope. My wife and I have two young children and I am the only one that currently works. Due to my own fears of abandonment and promiscuity I have push my wife to a point where she feels like she is controlled in everything that she does. I would like to overcome my issues of codependency and self worth so I can be the husband and father I need to heal my relationship and make it last.

Hi Anita,
I am not exactly sure of what help you are wanting. But the first thing I can think of is to ask you if you have taken these things to God in prayer? https://needencouragement.com/how-to-pray/
If so, what does God prompt you to do? If you have not prayed about it, then now is the time!
Do you attend a church? If not, here is a link to find a good bible believing church in your area. https://needencouragement.com/find-a-good-church/
I am sure you have a network of people you associate with. Maybe one or more of them could be someone you would want in your life more deeply. Reach out by calling a girlfriend to talk, and set up a time to meet for coffee or a meal. You could also invite someone over to your house, and in turn, they would most likely invite you to their home. That is what is good about being in a church. It makes it easier for fellowship and even to meet a male friend.
Besides praying to God, I also suggest that you get out a piece of paper and brainstorm some solutions to your situation.
Sometimes people can be lonely and try to fill their loneliness with a person or a thing, but through my life experience, that loneliness can be just an invitation from God to get closer to God!
If what I have shared has been of help to you, and if you have any questions or wish to elaborate on your situation, feel free to email me back. In the meantime, keep praying and trust God to supply your needs.
Bill Greguska
800-633-3446

Romans 12:18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.

1 Peter 5:7 Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.
 
 
 

 

 
Hi Ingrid,
I am glad you have reached out for some help. That is an accomplishment in itself! I, too, had a drug and alcohol habit/addiction, and I  wrestled with it by myself, then I tried AA and NA and ended up in long-term drug and alcohol treatment which went the Lord reached out to me, and I reached back finally. When I surrendered, I could finally have victory over drugs and alcohol. I believe with all my heart that if you surrender as I did, you will be free from your “habits” for good.
Since June 25th, 1986, I have quit using all drugs and alcohol. Prai8se God!
Here is a link to see what happened in my life and how God rescued me from myself! https://needencouragement.com/problems-drugs-caused-me/
God bless you!
Bill Greguska
800-633-3446

Romans 12:18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.

1 Peter 5:7 Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.

—–Original Message—–

Subject: Need Jesus bad
Message Body:
Need help with my personal life and relationship and had bad drug habit and alcohol

Hi Susan,
I am sorry to hear what you are going through. I pray that you take this to the Lord in prayer, asking God for strength, wisdom, and peace.
I am convinced that every marriage has two people that add to the problems, yet hearing just your side of the story, it seems pretty apparent that your husband has some issues that need attention. Marriage counseling takes both the husband and wife sitting next to each other with a counselor right in front hearing both sides. Pornography is a significant issue that needs to be overcome.
I suggest that you take good care of your health during your pregnancy and try to avoid stress the best you can. As far as your husband pornography is an ugly addiction, your husband needs some help, but if he does not want help, all you can do is pray for him each day and ask him to get help for his addiction to pornography. You can ask him yourself, but make sure you do it very respectfully. Here are a couple of links that will help him if he is willing to check them out. His involvement with pornography did not happen overnight, and I would think it would take some time and prayer to overcome. There is hope, but remember to keep things on God’s time. I pray that the Holy Spirit interviews in your husband’s life and your life as well. If your husband is open to some help, here are two links that can help him. If he is not open for help, I would not suggest you share them with him, use your best discretion.  
If you have any questions about what I have shared with you, please feel free to email me back. My help for you and your husband is limited because we only counsel via emails. You need to find someone that can help you both in person, such as a pastor or even a Christian counselor.
This part below is for you Susan.
I found some information below to consider that I hope it gives you some hope and peace of mind. I found it at https://ca.thegospelcoalition.org/article/says-husband-looking-porn/

It Isn’t Your Fault

The first thing women need to hear is that her husband’s pornography addiction isn’t her fault. I am appalled how often in Christian circles women are blamed for their husband’s sexual sin. “If you would sleep with him more, or be more willing in bed he wouldn’t sin” seems to be the common refrain. Even worse, a wrong reading of 1 Corinthians 7:5 (which warns “Do not deprive one another, except perhaps by agreement for a limited time, that you may devote yourselves to prayer; but then come together again, so that Satan may not tempt you because of your lack of self-control”) may be hauled out as a justification for the husband’s sin.
Do not get me wrong. This verse clearly instructs the married couple to have regular sexual relations. However, lack of relations does not then allow the husband (or wife for that matter) to commit sin. The verse says to “come together again, so that Satan may not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.” The inevitable outcome of a lack of regular sex between husband and wife is the possibility of temptation to sin. Sin is not an unavoidable act as a result of a lack of sexual relations.
God clearly commands us, within the bounds of marriage, to have regular sexual relations. It is possible that neglecting to do so may be a sin the wife needs to address in her life. If she loves her husband, she should want to help him to avoid temptation. And there is a reason God requires us to renew our marriage covenant through the physical relationship. Regardless, the husband choosing to sin, even if he is tempted, is his fault alone. There is no justification for sin. It is not her fault.

It Isn’t Necessarily the End of Your Marriage

The second thing women need to hear is that this is not necessarily the end of her marriage. God, in his mercy, allowed this situation to come to light. She is entering a hard season. One that will hurt a lot. Her husband is living a life that is contrary to God’s will and plan. The spiritual stress that he is under, and that he has placed his family under is not to be taken lightly. However, sin that is brought to light is sin that can be fought and put to death. There is the possibility of redemption, forgiveness on the other side of this. Christ makes broken hearts whole and redeems the unredeemable. A changing of heart, forgiveness and mercy can make her marriage whole again. But…

You Need Help

…this is no small matter. The spiritual attacks that happens when a person is engaging in persistent, consistent sin is devastating. She must be encouraged to seek help from her pastors. She will need help working through this betrayal. He will need help to overcome this sin. Their marriage will need help in order to thrive. Many men and women feel too much shame to confess this sin to their church leaders. If her husband refuses to speak to the pastors and continues persisting in the sinful lifestyle, she must seek help on her own. So many women don’t understand the widespread devastation this sin can cause in their families. It does not only affect the husband and wife, but also affects the spiritual health of the children and even her church family. She needs to be encouraged to seek help and prayer from her spiritual leaders.

Live in a Christ-like Manner

The final thing a woman must be encouraged in is to react in a Christ-like manner even in this betrayal.  Her husband may claim to be her brother in Christ, but is living in a manner which is inconsistent with true conversion. He is living in a manner which could potentially mean, without a spiritual transformation, he may be separated from God for all eternity. Consistent, persistent, unrepentant sin, shows a heart that has not been washed clean by Jesus blood. 1 Peter 3 talks about the importance of a woman’s conduct when a husband does not obey the word. The wife is responsible, even in this betrayal, for living in a Christ like manner before her husband. To show love and concern for his soul. To maintain the hallmarks of the fruit of the spirit, love, joy peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control (Gal 5 22-13). There will be a season of mourning and a time of righteous anger. But she must not allow her behavior towards her husband to become sinful in response to his sin. She needs to be encouraged to live in a Christ-like manner before him.
Your role in all this is to be a prayer warrior, encourager, confidant. You cannot fix him or her, so your responsibility, and privilege, is to offer support. On the good days you rejoice with her in what God has done, remind her to store up his promises in her heart. On the bad days, you give her scripture to encourage her, you pray with her, you remind her that trials such as this produce steadfastness and growth in sanctification so that one day we might be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing. Christ’s sacrifice gives us perfect hope.

Bill Greguska
800-633-3446

Romans 12:18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.

 

—–Original Message—–

Subject: Help with my marriage
Message Body:
I’m 7 months pregnant and raising 3 children. My husband has grown up in a traumatic childhood causing him to be sometimes triggered by these events. Well, one night I did ask him to pour some water before he went to sleep. We get 3 and 5 gallon jugs refilled with water and pour them into gallon water bottles. Well this time he forgot and I woke him up 3 am early to pour me some water so I don’t hurt myself. I kept asking until he did. He got so mad and drove off. Well, from that point because I triggered his painful past he wouldn’t hug me but all he wanted was sex. After I told him no hugs no sex he left the room and decided to sleep in another room because he was hurt. One night during marriage counseling, the lord had healed him of his pain, he continued too ok sleep in another room in the same house. Because he was under so much stress and healing that he decided to go stay at his friends house in the empty house part and he’s been staying there to heal and pray. It’s been almost 2 weeks since he decided to stay there. He drops in for brief moments and leaves. Knowing after I said no sex I asked him to let me reconcile he forgave me but he still won’t have sex with me. He told me last Wednesday that he’s staying at his friend’s house because he lied about saying he wasn’t doing porn and masturbated. He told  that he stopped, he just lied to me which cut deep.
Now he doesn’t want to have any intimacy with me until all the pictures are gone. I begged him we agreed together that this would only be a short time like it says in 1 Corinth 7:5 where it says do not deprive one another or you will fall into sin.
I’m finding it hard because physical intimacy is one of my needs and I wake every morning wanting to be near him intimately, but he doesn’t want it. He wants to wait 3-6 months until he comes back that means no looking at naked or touching. I don’t want to wait that long because I am going to have a baby soon and I will be healing from that. I want the marriage foundation restoration before baby.
Now whenever I try to talk to him he makes it hard for me to express what I’m feeling because I feel he mocks me and doesn’t understand my viewpoint.
I’m worried that he really didn’t stop porn and masturbation and that I fear he’s leaving me.
I have never been more lonely and so depressed.
I just want us back together
I also feel that he’s taking too much advice from his friend Don who his wife left him and now he’s in a relationship with another woman. I feel he mimicking his friends footsteps.
My husband also said I told you I am hard to love and told you not to marry me.
Please help.. I’m in so much stress and anxiety . Which I fear that the stress is going to harm the baby or worse. Our kids think it now normal that dad goes sleeps at his friends house and they have been acting out more and more. There I times when I can’t physically take the hardship with no help.
Then my husband comes to me and says I can’t imagine what you are going through but it must be really hard.
He wants to marry me again when he’s better and be intimate again with me.
This feels like torture and I want it to stop.
Please help pray for me guide me.

—–Original Message—–

Subject: Christian listening or counseling
Message Body:
I need help. I have no husband or children. I am 62. I feel all alone and am overwhelmed. thank you so much
Anita
 

Hi Daniel,
It is good that you have reached out, I hear you want to speak with me, but here at NeedEncouragement.com, we only counsel via email. If you are okay with that, I am okay with talking with you via email. Here are a couple of links to our website.
Let me know specifically what is going on with you?
Have you been praying about your situation?
Below are some things to consider.

Are You Taking Good Care of Your Health?

Some Of Our Problems We Have Stem From Physical Reasons. Click On Letters For Health Information!

A- B- C- D- E- F- G- H- I- J- K- L- M- N- O- P- R- S- U- V- W- Y- Z

 

We all have had difficult times in high school. Read about my basketball testimony of how God made a real impact on my life in a way I would never have expected.
  1. Eat healthy foods rather than junk?
  2. Avoid alcohol and sugar.
  3. Drink plenty of water.
  4. Get exercise every other day.
  5. Work hard, and play hard.
  6. Sleep 7 to 8 hours each night.
  7. Keep in touch with family and friends.
  8. Find humor in things.
  9. Keep yourself active and productive.
  10. Help or encourage someone else (especially if you are feeling down).
Bill Greguska
800-633-3446

Romans 12:18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.

1 Peter 5:7 Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.
 

—–Original Message—–

Subject: I’m usually highly motivated, but it’s all gone now.
Message Body:
Hello. I’m looking to speak with a life coach, and if there’s one that’s special with careers, I think that’d be good. I have low motivation right now, and I think part of it is that I’m really struggling to figure out what I want to do with my life. I’m usually a highly motivated person, but everything I’ve tried (career wise) has failed. I’ve gotten turned down from multiple jobs, and I’ve unsuccessfully started two businesses. I’m 28, married for 2 years in July, and I’m worried I won’t be able to take care of a family.
I used to have big dreams and be super passionate about my goals and ambitions, and now every day is a huge struggle for me. I don’t know what’s happened to me, really, but I want my fire back.
Thanks for your time,
Daniel

Hi Susie,
I am honored to help walk with you and your husband. We all need encouragement. Please feel free to, as you would say, “dump some of the weight.”
Our Christian counseling is via email so that you know. I want to share something very practical that you and your husband, I am sure, would benefit from. What I am referring to is that you for a season not to take on more commitments and responsibilities but rather delegate them to others in your church, this way, your load would be lighter, others in the church would be able to use their gifts to help others, and as a result, your husband’s stress would diminish. This suggestion is not only for your church situation but all of your life situations. You need to start to say “NO.” If not, you guys will become overwhelmed. Remember, “JUST SAY NO.”
Have your husband make up a list of his responsibilities weighing heavy on him, and you guys pray about the people in your church that God can raise to come to your side. (you do not have to tell everyone you are struggling) but offer your church the opportunity to serve the Lord. After praying about it, have you and your husband work together to fill those needs with people who have the skills to get things done for you guys!
I pray that you take this to the Lord in prayer, and feel free to email me back to share more. I hope what I have shared has been of help to you. Give it a try. You have nothing to lose and everything to gain! By the way, you are a good wife to reach out for help for your husband!
God bless you both,
Bill Greguska
800-633-3446
Romans 12:18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.
 

—–Original Message—–

Subject: A listening ear
Message Body:
I am pastor’s wife. We are in our 50s and my husband is very stressed in this season. I’m just looking for an anonymous place to dump some of the weight. We both love God with all our hearts and love each other completely. Things are just tough right now.
Thank you.

Hi Monica,
You are so very welcome, I pray that you can keep your focus on the Lord so in turn you will not be distracted by those things that cause you to procrastinate.
This link from my website I am sure will give you some good insights. https://needencouragement.com/distractions/
The Lord gave me a prayer this past summer, it goes like this, “Lord, what do you ant me to do?” Say that prayer to the Lord, and sit back and listen to what God has to say to you!!!
God bless you!
Bill Greguska
800-633-3446
1 Peter 5:7 Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.

—–Original Message—–
Subject: Re: NeedEncouragement.com “Marriage”

Shalom and thank you so much for your email and the prayers, I really appreciate it!

If you have time, I also would appreciate if you could pray for my procrastination, as I would like to come out of it on a permanent basis. It has lasted too long now. 
May the Lord’s peace and grace be with you and your family. 
Greetings from Monica in Norway. 
Hi Monica,
I will indeed pray for you right now.  I pray that whatever has caused strife and division in your marriage, the Holy Spirit will bring back to life and good health spiritually. I pray that any bitterness and lack of faith in the Lord will be put aside and that healing, love, and reconciliation will be present in Monica’s home. I also pray that whatever the locusts have eaten that the Lord will replenish. I pray that if there is any unconfessed or active sin in Monica’s house, the Lord God will take it all captive. AMEN!
Here are a couple of links to my website that can help you.
God bless you, and remember that God is watching over you!
Bill Greguska
800-633-3446

Romans 12:18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.

1 Peter 5:7 Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.

—–Original Message—–

Subject: Marriage
Message Body:
Please pray for our marriage and spiritual lives, for healing, restoration and renewing etc.

Hi Daisy,
I am 61 years old and I understand what you are talking about! I too struggled in high school. I did very well in basketball but I made a big mistake and got messed up with alcohol and drugs. If I could do it over again, I grantee you that I would have stayed far away. I can only guess, but most likely you might have tried medicating yourself with alcohol and drugs too. Keep in mind that alcohol is not a stimulant, but rather a depressant.
What I am trying to tell you, is that you have choices. It would be much easier to respond to what you are going through, instead of me guessing what is going on. I would like to share a scripture that will put things into better perspective for you.

 

John 16:33  “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”
Daisy, you did a very wise thing by reaching out, trying to carry the burden on your shoulder alone can be overwhelming. I am wondering if you attend a church? If not, here is a link to my site that can help you find one. Not having a church a person is missing out more that just hearing sermons, but the fellowship of other believers I believe can be so very valuable. Feel free to email me back if what I have shared has been of help to you. I pray that you take you concerns to God in prayer.
Bill Greguska
800-633-3446
Romans 12:18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.
 

—–Original Message—–

Subject: Depression
Message Body:
I’m having a hard time getting through my teen years pls help

Hi Aisha,
It is wonderful that you are seeking biblical marital counseling.
  1. The best advice is for you to take your marriage concerns to God in prayer individually and together with your husband.
  2. Next is to find someone you can both meet with weekly or bi-monthly who has been married and has already learned what you have not learned yet. (an older couple)
  3. Contacting your pastor is a wise idea to keep him in the loop of what is going on with the two of you.
  4. Have you gone through any premarital counseling which will address many things such as finances, resolving conflicts, sexual questions, planning and scheduling your life and activities, and other important topics?
  5. Keep praying individually and as a couple together.
Marital counseling is best when both the husband and wife are together in person talking to someone. But if you have a question or two, feel free to contact me back via email and I will try to give you good godly answers.
I pray that you not only grow closer to each other but more important to grow closer to God in the process.
Ecclesiastes 4:12 Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.
God bless you and your marriage,
Bill Greguska
800-633-3446
Romans 12:18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.
 

—–Original Message—–

Subject: Martial biblical counseling
Message Body:
Just got engaged and we are looking for biblical counseling and prayers

Hi Marie,
I pray for your requests and I will also send this to my friend Peg’s prayer list so that others will pray for you too! (minus your email address for your privacy)
Here is a link to a couple of pages from my website that might give you some insights into praying.
God bless you and if you have any questions, please free free to email me back. I trust that the Lord will hear our prayers! Pray
Bill Greguska
800-633-3446
Romans 12:18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.
 

—–Original Message—–

Subject: prayer request
Message Body:
Please pray for Arlington for direction, safety, protection, guidance and for him to hear and listen to God.
Pray for Marie for body healing, protection and travel mercy.
Pray for Nadege and Herve for marital problem.
Pray for Kenny who has Covid 19
Pray for my son’s new principal Dr. Ramsey. Her new start date is May 1st, 2022.
Best Regards,
Sister Marie

Hi Kenya,
I understand and feel your pain. Sometimes it is hard enough to deal with one issue at a time, but when three or four or five things happen all at once, it sure can be overwhelming. I say this to let you know that I have experienced something like what you are going through, and I need to tell you that as you keep your eyes on the Lord and His truth, you will discover that things will somehow work out. In 2005 my wife moved out for two years, divorced me, and I became very depressed. My sister’s husband died, my 14-year-old dog died, I lost my job, I lost a lot of friends due to leaving the church my ex and I attended, my step dad died, and my mom moved in with me. (my point is that God never left me, and I leaned on Him even more)
If what I have shared has been of help to you, and you wish to email me back, please feel free to do so. I pray that you will grow closer to the Lord during this dark time you are going through. It might be difficult at times, but keep calm and trust God. It was hard to believe that I would make it through all that I did, but God was faithful to me, and I trust He will be faithful to you too.
Here are a couple of scriptures that can be of encouragement to you.
  1. 1 Peter 5:7 Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.
  2. Matthew 6:26Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?

  3. Jeremiah 29:11-13 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.
More encouraging scriptures for you: https://needencouragement.com/encouraging-scriptures/
God bless you,
Bill Greguska
800-633-3446
Romans 12:18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.

—–Original Message—–

Subject: In need Counseling
Message Body:
Hello, been going through a very difficult time in my life with loss of 27 yr marriage, dealing with physical/health, financial, career changes and loss, struggling with circumstantial depression.  Everything is hitting me at the same time.  Went through a move/relocation and divorce during covid. Finding connections has been challenging with covid and people’s schedules. Don’t have much family support. I am a Christian and I’m encouraged with scriptures, worship, prayer and church services but life is taking a toll on me emotionally. I’m not thriving, I’m surviving.  I’m trying to move forward but with lack of finances and medical concerns it is making it that much harder. I’m available after 5pm M-F or Sat. at the moment.  Thank you and God bless you.

 


 

 

Hi Josias,
I have read what you wrote to me, and I can understand what you are feeling to some degree. You asked me what you should do, and my answer to you is to let her go. I say this because your futures were polar opposites and without like mindedness, you were setting yourself up for some real pain, much greater than you are going through now. It almost sounds like you were infatuated with her. You even used the word love which is a relative word but with out being physically in the same city and doing things together, it makes it so much easier to put up a false front in front of you and visa versa. 
I believe you need to thank God for the time He gave you to experience getting to know her, and then get back into your books. She might have been very charming and said things that you wanted to hear for the most part, but in the long run, what you are explaining is not something you ought to invest your time, energy, and heart into.
There will be another girl out there for you, pray about it and ask God to make something happen in His time, NOT your timing.
If what I have said has been helpful, feel free to email me back if you have any questions about what I have shared, or anything else.
God bless you,
Bill Greguska
800-633-3446
Romans 12:18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.
 

—–Original Message—–

Subject: Broken relationship
Message Body:
Two months ago I met a girl online. I had tried online dating for a change, and she had actually messaged me first. We talked and got to know each other over the course of a month. In terms of personality and all, she was basically everything I could want. She was sweet, caring, compassionate, affectionate, and most importantly she was very Christian. Along with that she was very beautiful and I just fell in love with her. Then after that first month, we decided to see how dating would work in a long distance relationship. I live in Georgia and she lives in California, so opposite sides of the country and she was 3 hours behind me. Despite that it went well. We talked a lot and we had fun playing games online and stuff. We rarely had problems and whenever we would, we’d resolve them almost immediately.
About a week after we started dating though, she went back to college. At first it was just online classes. It wasn’t too bad though. There were a few days here and there when we didn’t get to talk a lot, or when she was busy that night with homework. Then on Monday this previous week she started actually commuting to college. That’s when it started getting a bit hard. We didn’t talk as often throughout the day because she had to get up earlier and go to sleep earlier. I know it’s not her fault, but it just made it hard to build a healthy relationship when we barely got to talk.
Yesterday, I finally decided to actually talk to her about everything. I talked to her about what I just mentioned, along with the future. I know it’s a heavy topic, but I felt it would be best to get it over with towards the beginning. So I asked her where she sees herself in the future and what was her ideal future. I answered the same, and our futures were polar opposites. I know most couples would compromise and try to combine their futures so both of them are content, but with ours it’s hard to do so. We had very few options left and whichever we chose would result in one or both of us getting hurt, either short or long term.
Today we talked about it more. I guess we decided that it’d be best to break up. This is her first year in college, and it would mean waiting 3+ years for that while barely getting to talk as it was. Along with that, I would never want her to sacrifice her goals, dreams, and path in life for my sake. At this point I just feel like I’d be holding her back. It hurts me so much.
I asked her if she thought we should pray about it to see what God wants us to do. At first she had said we could, to see what God clarifies for us. Then right afterwards she said the Holy Spirit was telling her right now (meaning while ago in that moment), that I guess staying together right now and praying about it wasn’t the direction He wanted her to go and had planned.
But is that honestly it then? Is it no use in praying then? It feels like my whole world and all hope was just shattered into a million pieces. I truly wanted a future with her. I love her so much and in my heart she’s the one I wanted to be with. I really don’t wanna lose her, especially since we both still love each other, and I sincerely don’t want anyone else. I don’t know what to do anymore. Does what she said mean that God doesn’t intend for us to be together? I’m so hurt, lost, and confused at the moment. What should I honestly do?

Hi Marien,
I am sorry for not being more clear, I was referring to our website, and the 800 number to call or text another ministry called “Need Him” and also a chat link that you can chat with someone 24/7.
Above all my suggestions, keep your eyes on the Lord and pray to Him each day, preferably when you wake up in the morning so you do not forget.
Talk also to your daughter, build up some trust and add love to your words. Be firm, fair and fun as I mentioned previously!
If you have any thing else you would like to share, or any questions you would like to ask, please feel free to do so.
Bless you,
Bill Greguska
Luke 10:27 He answered, “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind’; and, ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’”

—–Original Message—–
Subject: Re: NeedEncouragement.com “Need counseling from overseas”

Hello Bill,

Thank you so much for taking te time to write to me. I am very interested in the resources you mentioned on the email, but did not find them.
I agree with that, our chikdren are the Lord’s. 
Blessing,
Marien.



El jue., 3 de mar. de 2022 10:19 a. m., NeedEncouragement.com / Bill <billgreguska@aol.com> escribió:
Hi Marien,
I am sorry to hear your frustration concerning your daughter. If it is any consultation to you, you are not the only one who feels anxiety and frustration with your daughter. Most all parents feel that to some degree.
Being a parent myself, I was given wise counsel many years ago telling me that my children are not mine, they are the Lords! We are only watching over them for Him. With that in mind, the burdened and pressure lowers and you can put things into better perspective. I had a philosophy in raising my son and daughter which was to be 1. fair 2. Fun. 3. Firm with them. This is a good way to look at raising your daughter. You need to set up boundaries, give her goals to reach for, give her rewards as well as consequences to her behaviors.

Ephesians 6:1-3  Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. 2 “Honor your father and mother”—which is the first commandment with a promise— 3 “so that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth.”
If what I have shared has been of help to you, feel free to email me back if you have any questions about what I have shared. I will pray that the Lord gives you the wisdom and courage to do what is right for your daughter and just do the best that you can, remembering that she is the Lord’s child, and you are simply helping her grow to be more like Christ.
Below are some resources that can be of help to you.
God bless you,
Bill Greguska
Luke 10:27 He answered, “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind’; and, ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’”

—–Original Message—–

Subject: Need counseling from overseas
Message Body:
Hello. I am from Venezuela. Need help regarding my 12 years old daughter. My relationship with her is not good and I don’t know what to do, what produces in me lost of anxiety and frustration.
I would like to know if I can chat, email or meet online with someone to get me a little help. Thanks. Blessing in Christ.

Hi Stephanie,
I would suggest that you go to God in prayer, He is the one who ultimately points us to solutions for our problems with his direction and wisdom from His word out of the Bible. The next suggestion would be to contact your pastor at your church for guidance. If you do not have a church you can check out https://needencouragement.com/find-a-good-church/
If none of those ideas are suitable for you and your daughter, she can email me and I could give her some direction.

You might want to ask your daughter if she has any unconfessed sin in her life, if so she can go to the Lord in prayer and confess it to Him.

1 John 1:9 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.
I pray that you do not overlook the power of prayer, but I realize sometimes it is good to share things with others who are believers.
God bless you and your daughter,
Bill Greguska
800-633-3446
Romans 12:18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.
 

—–Original Message—–

Subject:
Message Body:
I feel my daughter needs Christian counseling. She is 13. Is there anyone that can help someone on a tight budget?

 


Hi Jennifer,
We have a link offers a free Bible, all you need to do is visit https://needencouragement.com/free-bible/ which comes with free delivery, the only requirement is that you must live in the USA.
I hope you enjoy your free Bible.
Also you can visit https://needencouragement.com/free-things/ for other free offers.
God bless you!
Bill Greguska
800-633-3446
Romans 12:18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.
 

—–Original Message—–

Subject: Free bible
Message Body:
Can you please send me a Bible that is easy to read and understand.

Hi Destiny,
Our emotions have a tendency to want to worry, but it is clear that worrying is lack of faith in God who created the universe and each of us.
When we worry, our effectiveness becomes hindered greatly!
God bless you,
Bill Greguska
800-633-3446
Romans 12:18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.

—–Original Message—–


I was texting my gf, and she told me she was worrying, so at the time it felt like worrying wasn’t good. So I looked it up, and it said it was a sin. 



Hi Destiny,
Keep in mind that most of our problems is life come from our thinking more specifically worrying, anger, lust, greed, etc.
Now that you understand that worrying is a sin, ask God to take away your worrying when you catch yourself doing it. When we worry, it is like saying to God that we do not trust Him.
Matthew 6:25-27 “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?
I am curious, who told you that worrying is a sin? Who ever it is, I would suggest that you hang out with them more often! The people we spend time the most with, influence us the most. Sounds like a good friend you have there!
Bill Greguska
800-633-3446
Romans 12:18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.

—–Original Message—–


I had no idea worrying was a sin. I worry a lot! 

Hi Flavia,
Without knowing more about your situation, whether you initiated the separation? Is there violence or abuse in the home? Are you willing to sit down and talk with a counselor face to face?
I will briefly comment on what I think you are going through through my own experience going through a separation in 2005 and divorce in 2007. I was given wise counsel to not divorce my wife, since God hates divorce. That is why after my wife moved out, it took two years for her to divorce me since we had no biblical grounds for divorce. She found someone and wanted to marry him, but gave up on our marriage two years prior. My advice for you it to wait it out, keep praying, and seek a pastor or a Christian marriage counselor.
Use this time of separation as a spring board to regroup and get your marriage back on track. With the limited information you shared, this is my best advice I have for you at this point, it you wish to email me back and share more, or ask me some questions, I would be happy to try to give you clearer understanding of what I would do if I were you. I clearly understand that you are going through some dark days, but keep your eyes on God’s will and you will be seeing things more clearly soon.
Keep praying, and get closer to God for He is the one who holds the answers to your questions.
Bill Greguska
800-633-3446
Romans 12:18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.

—–Original Message—–

Subject: Marriage counseling
Message Body:
Hi, I am struggling with my current situation ( marriage separation decision) feel like kind of stuck and there is no one that I can share this in family or friends and seek guidance. Would be grateful  to have someone who can help me with my current situation. Thank you and God bless.

Hi Bessie,
I have taken the time to read over your email twice and I could not see where you are asking for any advice, so I hesitate to give you any.
Matthew 6:33 But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.
How is your relationship with God is right now? It appears that you being raised in the church, you realize that sin comes in many different flavors, for some it is alcoholism and drug abuse which was what I struggled with growing up and did great damage in my life. Other people’s flavor of sin for example is homosexuality. In my case alcohol and drugs were very pleasurable, but at the same time, pulled me away from God’s grace and protection. In your case, homosexuality is pleasurable for you, but the real question is, is it pulling you away from God’s grace and protection. Unfortunately, I would have to say yes. Sin is doing what is against God’s will found in the Bible.

Think about it for a minute, any sin you can think of, there is an immediate gratification that comes from it. God hates all sin, and if you are a believer in Jesus Christ, you can do what it says in

1 John 1:9 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.
 
Here are a couple links to our website that I believe can be of help to you.
Dear Bessie, If what I have shared has been of help to you, and if you wish to email me back with any questions or specific advice that you are seeking, I would be glad to help you more.
God bless you, and remember that He has the answers to any problems we have in life. God loves you!!!
Bill Greguska
800-633-3446

—–Original Message—–

Subject: Disowned
Message Body:
My name is Bessie. I’m 33, and engaged to my partner, who is also a woman. We have a 2 year old son together. In May, we will be together 8 years. We are 4 years engaged, but the wedding planning hasn’t really began.
Rewind to 2014.. 8 years ago. I was bi- curious. Even though homosexuality goes against everything I was taught growing up. My parents, brother and sister were brought up in a Bible believing Christian home. We went to church every Sunday. And Sunday night. And Wednesday. We were very involved with different activities. Basically, I grew up in church. I know this is not what God wants, but I still love my partner and desire to be with her.
My parents divorced in 2008. But, in 2005 at 16 years old I found out that my mom was cheating on my father.. With my dad’s uncle. She went to have several affairs with different men. After trying to fix things, they decided in December 2007 that the marriage was beyond repair. I was 18, decided that I had no interest in seeing my mom. We didn’t talk much until maybe 2012-ish.
In 2014 my dad found out about my new relationship, with my current partner. He sent me a text on Aug 6th 2014, saying that I’m no longer a part of the family. I was disowned. At that moment, I lost my job (my father owns a HVAC company and I was the secretary), moved 2 hrs. away, and lost everyone on my father’s side of the family. But, everything was butterflies and rainbows in my new relationship, I said “I don’t need him”. We only spoke once since then.. I decided in March 2016 that I wanted to go back to my family. This only lasted about 30ish hours.. I really was missing my partner. I left without saying a word and that’s the last time I’ve seen or spoke to my father.
I love my father dearly. He may be controlling and set in his ways, but I still love him. There’s a part of me that wants to reach out to him and see if we can fix this broken relationship.
My mother and I have a strained relationship. She is not an easy person to talk to. She is the type that says “I can’t help you, pray and ask God”. Even as a child, I did so much because my mom pushed me to be independent. Nothing wrong with that! But, everyone needs some guidance sometimes.
My sister, who is 7 years younger than me is also lesbian. My father restricted all contact between us, when he found out that I was seeing a woman. We are extremely close, and those 3 years without communication from her, nearly killed me. I was extremely suicidal, but hid those feelings. In May 2017, she texted me out of the blue and said “please come get me”, and she has lived with my partner and I since then. She also does not speak to her father.

Hi Carmal,

I am not a doctor, but I can give you my ideas and you and decide if they might be helpful to you.
  1. Are you getting enough sleep?
  2. How is your diet?
  3. Are you drinking enough water?
  4. Do you get regular exercise?
  5. Are you stressed out about things?
  6. Are you over 60 years old?
  7. Have you had a doctors check up recently?
  8. Have you been reading your bible?
  9. Have you been praying?
  10. Is there any unconfessed sin in your life?
  11. Have you mentioned in this to your husband that you are struggling concentrating?
  12. Are you and your husband getting along well or is there friction in your marriage?
James 1:5If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.
If what I have shared has been helpful to you, please feel free to email me back if you have any questions or would like to share more. I pray that you take my suggestions to the Lord in prayer!
May God bless you and give you the wisdom you need.

 

Bill Greguska
800-633-3446
Romans 12:18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.

 

—–Original Message—–

Subject: Why is it that I’m not concentrating well?
Message Body:
My husband ask me to do something and It’s  like I do hear him but I’m not communicating well with him.  What causes me not to communicate with him like I should?

Hi Marissa,

It is wonderful that you want more and more about the Bible and that you are getting into God as you say.
You did not ask anything in particular, but I have a resource for you to check out. GotQuestions.org I encourage you to check it out and plug in the questions that you have and you will be surprised all the wisdom that there is to be found on that site. 
Feel free to email me back if you wish and let me know how you liked the site? 
I pray that the Lord will open your eyes and ears to what you need to see and hear!

God bless you Marissa, and may He revile more and more of Himself to you to apply to your life!

Bill Greguska
800-633-3446
Romans 12:18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.



—–Original Message—–

Message Body:
Hello, my name is Marissa. I have recently become more and more into the Bible and into God. And I have so many questions. My mind goes all day long about god and I don’t feel connected to him. Since getting into the Bible I am not as happy, I’m more scared and confused than ever before. I need help. I want a connection with God and I want to live for him. I have so many questions about the Bible and my life and my faith and I really need help. I just moved and am looking into churches here (haven’t been in forever) but I have severe social anxiety. I’m hoping this site can point me in the right direction to help me with my spiritual crisis. Please help and thank you.

Hi Mary,

I sent your prayer request to my friend Peg who has a prayer list that people pray for the needs of many people, now including your mother, father, husband and yourself.
See if you can find some help for your mother to be able to help your dad. There are church and ministry groups and also governmental organizations that can be of help to your family.
I pray that you draw close to the Lord and that he strengthens your mom and heals your dad, and that your husband will find some healing from his addiction!
Here are some links to our website that can be of help to you and your family.

https://needencouragement.com/anxiety/

https://needencouragement.com/how-to-pray/

Bill Greguska
800-633-3446
Romans 12:18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.

 

—–Original Message—–

Subject: Urgent prayer request
Message Body:
Please pray for
My 81 year old father who has lots of health problems & can hardly walk & leg infections that won’ t heal. Please also pray for my 80 year old mother who is his only caretaker & please pray for me for fear anxiety & depression & for my husband’s  addictions . Thank You & please send a response to my email above.

Hi Isreal,
I got your request for a free daily devotional. All you need to do is to click on the link below and follow the prompting.
As far as your drug addiction here is a link that can be of help to you.
You also asked about sexual lust which you can find some good information at
I hope what I have shared will be of good help to you, if you have any questions feel free to email me back.
I pray that you will find your answers in God’s word through praying, reading, and fellowship with other believers in Jesus Christ.
God bless you, and I also pray that the Lord will take away your addiction to drugs and alcohol as He did for me on June 25th, 1986.
Bill Greguska

Call 800-633-3446

Or text 800-633-3446 if you prefer to talk that way.
Or Simply Chat Here
Romans 12:18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.
 
I want daily encouragement to be availed on my email account. I also want some help on how I can overcome, addiction to drugs, sexual lust.
Thank you.

Hi Angie,

If I understand you correctly, it sounds like you are trying to stop sinning in your own power and by doing things to accomplish your goal. Yes, it is wonderful that you seem to want to get right with God, but instead of relying on your works to accomplish that, you need to go to God in prayer and ask Him what you need to do.
James 1:5If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.
As far as your swearing goes, think about when are the times that you 1. most likely swear, 2. what you swear about, 3. who you are with when you swear, and try to avoid those times. But ultimately you need to rely on God to deliver you from swearing and all other sins you are involved with, by confessing your sins and being willing to repent from them. 
1 John 1:9 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.
Do you believe you are saved by God’s grace or by what you can do to save yourself. Stop relying on yourself, and start relying on God. When you say, ” I use to not take religion seriously until recently”.  I would highly suggest that you focus on your relationship with God rather than following man made rules through religion to make you so called “good.”
Ask God to give you strength and wisdom to remove the sins that grieve His heart. It may come right away, or it might come in steps. In my life it did both, on June 25th, 1986, I turned the wheel of my life over to God by faith, I tried to stop swearing and I had some success, but every so often I slipped, God knows your hearts desire whether it is to please Him or not. Sometimes our flesh can be weak, that is why I say to keep praying and asking God for strength. 
If what I have shared with you has been of help, feel free to email me back if you have any questions about what I have shared. I pray that you grow closer to God each day and you flee from the sins that so easily entangle us.
You know what you want, and you know what God wants, now you can go about doing His will in His way.
God bless you, and may you continue to grow closer to Him each day through daily prayer, reading scriptures’, and fellowshipping with other believers.
Bill Greguska
800-633-3446
Romans 12:18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.



—–Original Message—–

Subject: Undecided
Message Body:
I’ve been sinning a lot. I cannot seem to work out how to repent from the sin of swearing and also from the sin of using God’s name in vain. I read the bible, I listen to online sermons and I ask God for forgiveness whenever I sin. I use to not take religion seriously until recently. I even feel bad for eating because I was fasting in order to higher a chance of repentance. I feel numb with all of my emotions… Yet I try to remind myself not to dwell on them… Ugh. Sorry.

Hi Marien,
I am sorry to hear your frustration concerning your daughter. If it is any consultation to you, you are not the only one who feels anxiety and frustration with your daughter. Most all parents feel that to some degree.
Being a parent myself, I was given wise counsel many years ago telling me that my children are not mine, they are the Lords! We are only watching over them for Him. With that in mind, the burdened and pressure lowers and you can put things into better perspective. I had a philosophy in raising my son and daughter which was to be 1. fair 2. Fun. 3. Firm with them. This is a good way to look at raising your daughter. You need to set up boundaries, give her goals to reach for, give her rewards as well as consequences to her behaviors.
Ephesians 6:1-3  Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. 2 “Honor your father and mother”—which is the first commandment with a promise— 3 “so that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth.”
If what I have shared has been of help to you, feel free to email me back if you have any questions about what I have shared. I will pray that the Lord gives you the wisdom and courage to do what is right for your daughter and just do the best that you can, remembering that she is the Lord’s child, and you are simply helping her grow to be more like Christ.
Below are some resources that can be of help to you.
God bless you,
Bill Greguska
Luke 10:27 He answered, “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind’; and, ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’”

Hi Ethan,
You know what the right answer to your comment is. Who ever you have been enticed with, you need to leave alone. You have a good oppertunity to do what is right.
Do you have someone like a pastor or close friend that can help you keep accountable. I am sure you know that sin is pleasurable for a little while, but in the end, leads to death!
Most sins a person needs to fight, but sexual sins like adultery needs to be fled from!
1 Corinthians 6:18 Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a person commits are outside the body, but whoever sins sexually, sins against their own body.
I pray that you make the right decision, and stay away from that women by all means!
Proverbs 6:32 But a man who commits adultery has no sense; whoever does so destroys himself.
If you have any other questions, feel free to email me back.

 

Bill Greguska
Luke 10:27 He answered, “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind’; and, ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’”

—–Original Message—–

Subject: Thoughts if infidelity in marriage
Message Body:
Been thinking about cheating on my wife and looking at other woman when I’m alone

Hi Nina,

You can feel free to let me know what is going on with you. Our Christian counseling is done for free via email. 
You can also click on the CHAT HERE link below and / or text live with someone 24 / 7 if that would be better for you?
Please feel free to email me back or call the 800 number below or the chat link.

God bless you and may you draw more near to Him each day!

Bill Greguska
800-633-3446
Romans 12:18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.

 

—–Original Message—–

Subject: My trust in God is broken
Message Body:
I am seeking help, but I don’t have many people in my circle and no money to pay foe a counselor. Government programs would not direct me to a Christian counselor. Could you at least direct me where I can go if you can’t help?

Hi Mike,
It sounds like you are going through some dark times and you are having some doubts in your life.
Look at it this way, you are alive on this planet, you got here somehow and something is keeping you alive.
Could it be that you are going through some things in your life right now and you are not getting the results that you wish for. Or possibly are you depressed and overall exhausted about life in general.
Hebrews 11:1 Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see.

Can you think back to your childhood whether or not that was a good time in your life or not, but think of it this way. Did your parents always give you what you asked for? At the same time, they provided a roof over your head, food in your stomach, clothes on your back, plus many other things. My analogy is that God sometimes does not give us what we want, but He gives us what we need. Be patient, God has a plan for your life.

Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.
Let me ask you, up until now, have you had a pretty good relationship with God?
Do you have any unconfessed sins in your life? 1 John 1:9  If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.
When was the last time you prayed to God? https://needencouragement.com/how-to-pray/
What do you think has put doubt in your heart and mind? https://needencouragement.com/skeptic/
You are obviously concerned or you would not have email me asking what you are asking.
What do you think you ought to do about this? The answer is to get into God’s word by reading it, hearing it on the radio or internet.
Romans 10:17 Consequently, faith comes from hearing the message, and the message is heard through the word about Christ.
My suggestion to you is to go to your church, talk to your pastor, and start spending time with other believers. It is like charcoal, when one piece of charcoal isolates from the other pieces, their heat goes out, that is what it sounds like you are going through. You need to be with other believers to stay lit since your flame is going out by being alone.
Ephesians 6:12-13 For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. 13 Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand.
God bless you and I pray that you begin to grow closer to God in the coming days. I hope what I have shared has been of help to you,. if it has, please feel free to email me back if you have any questions. In the mean time, start praying, reading your Bible, spend time with other believers.
Bill Greguska

NeedEncouragement.com

Call or text 800-633-3446 or Chat Here

Subject: NeedEncouragement.com “I don’t know if He’ll help me”

Message Body:
As of now, I worry that I need to depend on my understanding of God and He won’t help me.
I heard “God loves me” in the past and I had a sense of safety due to realizing it….
But now, I don’t know if God helps and it is just the understanding that helped me…
Before I just talked to Him due to what the truth was, but now I’m really insecure it is just on me to think of Him and He doesn’t help…..
I know that, I need to realize God is there and loves me, it’s the truth, but it seems as if I need to make the first move and try so hard, and I worry about if He’ll pursue me, or if He’ll only help me if I understand things well enough…..
He says He loves me, and before I just realized it since before I thought of Him as distant, but I don’t know if He’ll love me and help me or if I have to figure it out myself…..

Hi Cheyenne,
People often point at God to be the reason they are not feeling well, and yes, often there are spiritual problems such as unconfessed sin, yet put blame on God although overlook physical and emotional issues and factors such as:
See if any of these thing are holding you back and making you feel the way you are feeling?
  1. Eat healthy foods rather than junk?
  2. Avoid alcohol and sugar.
  3. Drink plenty of water.
  4. Get exercise every other day.
  5. Work hard, and play hard.
  6. Sleep 7 to 8 hours each night.
  7. Keep in touch with family and friends.
  8. Find humor in things.
  9. Keep yourself active and productive.
  10. Help or encourage someone else (especially if you feel down).
Take a look at these points and I am sure you might find that you have overlooked one or more that one of these things. Keep praying and trust God to give you the direction that you need. It might sound strange, but focus on encouraging others and you will find that you will be encouraged yourself!
I pray that what I have shared has been of help to you, if you have any questions about what I have shared, feel free to email me back.
God bless you!
Bill Greguska
Luke 10:27 He answered, “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind’; and, ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’”

—–Original Message—–

Subject: Anxiety/ Depression
Message Body:
I’m trying to hard to keep my eyes on God. I’m pray by, reading my bible, trying to serve my community and be in church but I still feel hopeless and sad for no reason. My life is beautiful and blessed and I have no reason to feel this way.

Thank you for kind words and sending me very informative links , I would definitely go through all. And also keep continuing to Jesus and listen to his words. I am trying my best to do. Please keep me in your prayers. 
Hope things will work better for us. 
God bless you and your work. Thanks again for encouraging words
Regards 
Flavia. 

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From:NeedEncouragement.com / Bill <billgreguska@aol.com>
Sent: Friday, February 25, 2022 9:47 PM
To:flavialobo86@gmail.com
Subject: Re: NeedEncouragement.com “Marriage counseling”

Hi Flavia,
Let me first start by asking you a very important question, have you been praying about this situation you are in? If so, what has God been prompting you what to do?

And yes, I will keep this a private matter.

I am sorry to hear that you are in a very difficult situation. I went to GotQuestions.org and found some information that I think you ought to look into for your husband. https://www.gotquestions.org/Hindu-Christian.html
Here is another link to look at https://www.gotquestions.org/Christian-bindi.html
Scripture is very clear about staying with an unbeliever. Yet I understand there is more to it than just staying married. 
Corinthians 7:12-14: “…If any brother has a wife who is not a believer and she is willing to live with him, he must not divorce her. And if a woman has a husband who is not a believer and he is willing to live with her, she must not divorce him. For the unbelieving husband has been sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife has been sanctified through her believing husband…”
Getting involved with a mixed marriage is something that is not easy to deal with. It almost sounds as though you gave up your faith to your husband and now are feeling resentful as a results. Didn’t you think that you would expect problems before you got married, but that is water under the dam.. Now that you are married and he is willing to live with you, it would be wise to make the best of the situation that you are in. Don’t you agree? https://needencouragement.com/better-marriage/
I pray that you can use God’s word to find a solution to your situation.
James 1:5  If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.
If what I have shared has been of help to you and if you want to respond, feel free to email me back. Also if you have any questions you can also go to GotQuestions.org to search out your own specific questions.
God bless you!
Bill Greguska
800-633-3446
Romans 12:18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.

 

—–Original Message—–

Hello Bill, 
Thank you so much for your quick response and positive thoughts. I am not sure how and from where to start with as this is been adding up since few years but thought by time lot will change , unfortunately I do not see that in my case. I really appreciate if my story can be kept confidential and will be glad to hear from you. 
I believe in Jesus Christ and through his blessings I have survived in dark days and been wonderful  so far. Thank you to almighty. Praise the lord. 
Iam an catholic and my husband is from different religion (Hinduism) and were dating for 4 years before marriage. Getting parents acceptance from both side was really tough – it didn’t take much time from my parents and convinced them saying I will be happy in this relationship. Since two different religion was involved it was hard to start with our marriage life. My husband didn’t wanted to tell his family about our relationship and also about our church wedding and kept it secret. Before our church wedding ceremony and also when we decided to get married he promised me and took oath on bible that we will not hurt each other feelings on religion and will raise our kids in both religion beliefs. But now as days passed he is not happy with my belief, prayers  and also if I want my kids to follow and teach them about Jesus. He kept our church wedding as secret till now with his parents. After our church wedding it took him 6 months to tell his parents about us and finally with 5 condition his parents agreed to get us married again according to their culture and religion. I wasn’t ready to accept all those 5 condition (changing my name, religion, never seeing my parents , raising kids only In Hinduism, turning myself completely vegetarian)which really affected me and my family , but my husband started convincing me saying he got married as per church wedding and over the time his parents will change and these conditions wont matter. It was like forcefully he made me agree for those conditions. Finally the marriage (2nd time in Hindu rituals ) happened and since then it’s been  just compromising – initially after my marriage when I stayed with his family in his native for 1 month( without him ) , I had gone through a lot mentally about religion and insulting my parents etc. Forcefully I had to follow all rituals , traditional religion stuff with his parents for the  sake of love and relationship. I got pregnant within a year and with all this mental trauma I lost the baby. I pleaded my husband let’s go out of the country and see if he finds any job outside India so I will be away from all these pressure from his family. I was never given respect at his place , they just ignored my existence  all the time. But I always kept quiet as talking against wasn’t allowed in his family. He never stood by my side whenever I was in that situation. He kept on saying everything will change , just do whatever his parents are asking to do for his love sake. I feel relationship is always give  and take but in my case it was just giving from my side. 
Finally after few months  he got the job opportunity in UK and within 2 months we shifted to UK. In all these days my God was with me who was keeping me strong and guiding me. I was happy that we shifted and my sister was also settled down in UK so thought I will have some moral support but again my husband and his family were not happy about it. So I limited my meeting with my sister- I was never allowed to eat meat or fish at home , initially I used to hide and eat and once he came to know I am eating and he was ok with it but he kept condition not cooking at home and eat from outside restaurants. I was still ok with that. His parents still continued visiting ( 2 months stay  at our house ) to UK every year. I started ignoring whatever they used to say but still there was lot of pressure on  religion side from their end and I was forcefully performing all traditional rituals whenever they wanted me to do. . I had wonderful few office friends who were been great support and help to me while I was doing my job. In 2years of shifting to UK we visited India at his place for their Diwali festival celebration and stayed for 9 days during this time we had major arguments and I was made to sit in front of his whole family and suddenly they started blaming me for everything and insulting my family. My husband was sitting quiet next to his mother and didn’t even said one word. I felt like helpless and heartbroken. He had never been to my house since we got married so we had planned and booked our tickets in advance and he refused to come along with me further from his place in front of his family after all these arguments. As his parents didn’t wanted him to visit my parents place. I didn’t say anything still and just cried myself and went alone to my parents place where my family was waiting to see him after so many years of marriage. I just stayed at my place for  a week without sharing my situation at my husband place. They still don’t know anything about my situation as I do not want to stress and worry them out. I remember that my father told me before getting married that this marriage will give you lot of stress  and you will not be able to handle if anything goes wrong with you but I didn’t listen to my dad.
  I came back to uk after a week and by then i was completely changed , since that incident in his place I felt I was heartbroken and no respect in our relationship and I stopped talking to his family from then. But I felt our relationship was weakening which I brought it up to my husband but he just didn’t react to it.   Whenever we have to travel to India it will be always as per his family demand and their festival celebration. I never got to travel for Christmas to be with my my parents in these 10 years of marriage
 I was struggling to get pregnant after 3 years of first miscarriage . I had few complications but by god grace and all my family prayers we had beautiful girl ( now she is 4 years old).  Life went on and we moved to USA 3.5 years ago for my husband job opportunity. After we shifted USA we got our own home and have been blessed with baby boy ( he is 2 year old now ).  I had quit my job when I moved to USA and my husband was doing great in his career here and getting promotion and built his career well. It’s been 4 years I have left my job and unfortunately I do not drive ( never driven ) here. So I have completely dedicated myself to kids and looking after house.   I have struggled a lot in these 4 years in new place without friends and close  family help and even no support from my husband, in spite of having so much health issues (back pain and prolapse bladder pain) I myself do all house chores and manage kids. If I ask for help from him evening or weekend he would say who will do his office job and wouldn’t even bother to help me out.  I have struggled with my regular doctor appointment during pregnancy, I had to visit hospital every week due to gestational diabetics where he would take me but with so much irritation and anger. Even after giving birth he went back to job in 15 days inspite of having the flexibility to take 2-3 months paternity leave. 
I am so heartbroken 😔, now I feel I am just staying in this relationship for kids sake. He always blames me whenever my daughter screams and throw tantrums ( she is 4 year old toddler) that it’s all because of me which makes me feel sad. Whole week we don’t have proper conversations at home ( morning to evening I am behind kids and he is in his office room , kids sleep by 7 pm and he goes to gym after that and when he is back around 10 pm I am already sleeping. Weekend also after kids sleep he will have a drink with me and sit and watch some movies which is not of my interest and I forcefully sit there thinking will have some our time together – relaxing talking about us , kids family etc but that never happens. after I moved here I feel so lonely, sometimes depressing for not having any friends or family to talk and meet. 
I was away for 2 months, had been to my moms place with kids after so many years. Since then I am back it’s just arguments daily and if I correct him when he help me around ( only 2-3 time in a week) he gets frustrated and annoyed. 
Now we had little argument recently on kids bath process and while he was giving bath , since my daughter had reaction being in soapy water bathtub I was worried about her – I just requested if he could clean her well in water to get rid of soap.  he just got so annoyed that he said he is fed up with this and cannot listen to me , that he wants to talk to his parents about us and let them know that we are not happy with each other, I did not stop him from talking with his family and he requested he need privacy to talk.
I am just in shock and sad about it and don’t know how to react to this situation. 
I am concerned about- 
  1.  I completely dedicated my time and life to this relationship ( without sharing my pain to my parents  – initial days struggles with his family). Now I want to get back to job and get my driving license, which is difficult without his help and support whereas he is just focused on his job all the time and life. 
  2. I am worried for my kids , if we get separated how they will survive and mental trauma they have to go through without me or him ( not sure what is the legal process for parents here )
  3. I am without job and don’t know driving which scares me thinking about my future to manage everything by myself and kids. 
  4. I loved him so much and I feel was it my mistake that I pleaded  him to get marry 10 years ago ( after 4 years of dating)without knowing one day I will have to go through this situation. Today I felt wish I never met him. 
  5. He loves his kids and no doubt about that, he loves his job also too much that we hardly speak and spend time together. He says he cannot change and agree that he never did house chores or helping at home and is been like this from the time we have met. So cannot change or help me around. 
  6. I cannot speak to my parents about our current situation on separation discussion that we are having- I am worried about them as they are 70+year old plus my dad is heart patient almost bedridden since few days. So not sure how to speak with them whereas my husband says he has already told his parents not to be surprised if we come and tell them one day that we are getting separated. He says I am short tempered so it’s hard to talk to me about us. So now he is waiting for me to take decision on this relationship and talk to my parents about it. 
  7. Religion matter- this is very personal and I never ever asked him to do anything on my belief but when it comes to his side he wants me to be part of it which I am not happy and I definitely want my kids to go through all the Christianity process but I am sure he won’t agree on that. I myself have  stopped going to church since we married( which makes me feel sad but did it for this relationship)  and there are days I have been to the Sunday church and he always said why are you doing this then I will also start going to temple or start listening to  the religious songs or etc. 
  8. Eating meat and fish – since my kids where in my parents place for 2 mother developed taste of eating fish and chicken most of the days and now when are back here I cannot cook inside and hence I have made an arrangement outside the house to cook on camping stove so that I myself also get to eat and kids too. But he is not happy that kids eat fish and chicken. 
  9. Is reaching out to the marriage counselor is good option , he would not definitely come for Christian marriage counseling or to the pastor. 
Thank you so much for your time and sorry for writing such big email.
Thank you again. 
Regards 
Flavia 

Subject: Re: NeedEncouragement.com “Marriage counseling”

Hi Flavia,
Without knowing more about your situation, whether you initiated the separation? Is there violence or abuse in the home? Are you willing to sit down and talk with a counselor face to face?
I will briefly comment on what I think you are going through through my own experience going through a separation in 2005 and divorce in 2007. I was given wise counsel to not divorce my wife, since God hates divorce. That is why after my wife moved out, it took two years for her to divorce me since we had no biblical grounds for divorce. She found someone and wanted to marry him, but gave up on our marriage two years prior. My advice for you it to wait it out, keep praying, and seek a pastor or a Christian marriage counselor.
Use this time of separation as a spring board to regroup and get your marriage back on track. With the limited information you shared, this is my best advice I have for you at this point, it you wish to email me back and share more, or ask me some questions, I would be happy to try to give you clearer understanding of what I would do if I were you. I clearly understand that you are going through some dark days, but keep your eyes on God’s will and you will be seeing things more clearly soon.
Keep praying, and get closer to God for He is the one who holds the answers to your questions.
Bill Greguska
800-633-3446
Romans 12:18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.

—–Original Message—–

Subject: Marriage counseling
Message Body:
Hi I am struggling with my current situation ( marriage separation decision) feel like kind of stuck and there is no one that I can share this in family or friends and seek guidance. Would be grateful  to have someone who can help me with my current situation. Thank you and God bless.

Hi Diane,
It is good that the two of you have talked yesterday and have made some progress. Now pray that you can be gracious to your husband and not bring up what has been resolved. Let it be and move forward in your relationship.
As far as your husband wants you to make a certain amount of money, offer the suggestion of cutting back the budget such as cable, going out to eat less often, and cutting back in any areas that you can think of. Yes, it would be nice to get a good paying job, but cutting back might be an option you have not considered yet.
Ecclesiastes 5:10 Whoever loves money never has enough; whoever loves wealth is never satisfied with their income. This too is meaningless.
1 Timothy 6:10 For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil. Some people, eager for money, have wandered from the faith and pierced themselves with many griefs.

You mentioned that your parents are concerned about you, which is understandable to a point, but you need to remember that you are married to your husband not your parents.

Genesis 2:24 That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.
Mark 10:6-8 “But at the beginning of creation God ‘made them male and female.’ ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two, but one flesh.
 
Besides trusting God, it is very important that you continue to try to trust and respect your husband. In doing so, you will be honoring God and your prayers will not be hindered. Once you show to your husband that you will follow him, you will notice improvement in your marriage. What ever you have been doing, does not seem to be working, try to do what God commands his people to do. Do not be so concerned to get your husband in line, you just need to get yourself in line and your good example will convict your husband and he will do what is right too, give it some time, but it will happen.
Ephesians 5:21-23Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior.
Once more important thought, go to your pastor today and let him know what is going on, so that he can give you some help and guidance too. Thinking you can handle it all on your own I am sad to say, that you will be very frustrated and ultimately disappointed. Keep praying specific prayers! God created marriage and He will help you to make it work, you must be willing to do it His way or unfortunately continue to struggle.
I am praying for the two of you!
Bill Greguska
Luke 10:27 He answered, “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind’; and, ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’”

—–Original Message—–
Subject: Re: NeedEncouragement.com “Marriage and Career Struggles”

Thanks for your response Bill. Yes, I have been praying about my marriage for many years. In the past two years my husband has been emotionally abusive towards me and it has been hurtful. I had a long talk with him yesterday and he admitted some of the sins that he has committed against me.  I hope that after our talk he will improve his behavior. I would be happy and joyful again if he would stop saying such terrible things to me. Another issue is that I am also currently unemployed and my husband has told me that I have to get a new job soon making the same amount I was in my last job because we are not able to pay our bills without my income. You suggested that I make the best of what I have, but I do not have any income or career at the moment. Maybe God just wants me to remain unemployed since that is the situation he has me in. I will continue to trust him even though these circumstances are very difficult to deal with and my parents are very concerned about me.

 

On Mon, Mar 7, 2022 at 9:24 AM NeedEncouragement.com / Bill <billgreguska@aol.com> wrote:
Hi Diane,
After reading your email, the first thought I had, was to ask you if you have been praying about your marriage and your career situations. Often when we take our eyes off the Lord, other parts of our lives suffer because of it.
When you married your husband, you were full of joy and happiness, what do you think has lead to your unhappiness?
As far as your career, do you think it is premature to consider looking for a new career or simply make the best of what you have?
If what I have shared has been helpful and you wish to be more specific, feel free to email us back.
I pray that you take all your concerns to God in prayer, for He is the one who holds the answers to all our questions.
God bless you,
Bill Greguska
Luke 10:27 He answered, “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind’; and, ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’”

—–Original Message—–

Subject: Marriage and Career Struggles
Message Body:
I am unhappy in my marriage and career and I could use some advice and prayer in both areas.

Hi Penny,
It sounds like things are working out to some degree, but it also sounds like you would love to find a new normal. It sounds like your present husband is pretty much set in his ways, that I why I was trying to encourage you to pick up the slack he is not carrying himself. To do this I would suggest that you try to show physical love to him. Respect him. Bring some humor into the relationship, and continue to pray for him and also yourself. I realize what I am saying sounds like it is not fair, or the way it should be, and you are right, but when life gives you lemons, make lemonade. You can also drop hints to what you want for him to do, say, remember, etc. or you can even write it down on paper. Try not to provoke him by nagging him or disrespecting him in public or also private which I hope you do not do.
I have shared all that I can think of, now it is up to you, and God, and your husband to get things together. Be patient…
May God bless you, and I am sorry I could not have been more of a help to you than I was.
Take it one day at a time, realizing that you are not going to change your husband, but like my pastor once told me, the man is the head of the body, but the neck is the one that turns the head.
Keep praying! Pray
Bill Greguska


NeedEncouragement.com

Call or text 800-633-3446 or Chat Here

—–Original Message—–
Subject: Re: NeedEncouragement.com “Questions”

Hi Bill,

To answer your questions: Yes I pray constantly for my husband but no he doesn’t pray with me about it.  He doesn’t even recognize that there is a problem.  And I do know and agree that one person is not 100% right and the other person 0% right.  Of course, I realize you are only hearing my side of things.  I wish my husband would agree to get counseling together with me. I am not saying that our marriage is on the rocks or anything.  I just want to “nip things in the bud” before it gets that bad.
Secondly, I have always been the peacemaker in the family.  When I was married to my first husband of 30 years until he passed away, I always did everything in my power to keep peace.  So much so that I would suppress my feelings because I did not want him to get mad and cuss me out.  He was a good husband and good provider, but I could not carry on a reasonable conversation with him, about certain things (such as bills), without him getting upset, so I mostly kept my mouth shut.  I believe, to this day, that that is the reason why I developed physical problems, because it is not good when you have to hold things inside like that for too long.  I have been through a lot during my childhood and my adulthood — things that I should have gotten counseling for back then but was unable to.  You just don’t know.  So when you say I should submit to my husband that is like a punch in the gut.  That is all I have done for most of my married life.  That is a typical male response.  I have done that and all that has accomplished is enabling my husband to continue to do what he pleases without any thought of my needs.  Do you think it is appropriate for a husband to be self-centered and only buy the things he needs without any consideration for the needs of his wife?  You are forgetting the other side of the coin.  The husband is supposed to take care of his wife like Jesus takes care of the church.  I know my scripture too.  It takes both the husband and the wife to make a marriage work — not just one submitting to the other.  
Do you think it is okay for him to ignore special days like Valentine’s Day or spending quality time with his wife?  And when that special day has arrived, including anniversary, he says he doesn’t have the money to take me out and that I have to wait.  Well I wait and I wait, but it has been the same thing every year for the past several years.  I keep hoping that by the next time that it would change but it doesn’t.  
My first husband never forgot our anniversary, birthday, Valentine’s Day, or any other holiday.  He was very generous to me when it came to that.  He was not perfect of course.  He was not really a romantic person, but he did show me that he loved me by thinking about me in other ways.  He was not perfect of course.  Nobody is.  And I am not trying to compare him to my current husband because they are two different people and I know that you are not supposed to do that.  But my current husband refuses to admit that he could be wrong about anything.  He makes excuses for everything saying stuff like “I forgot” or “I didn’t hear you” or “I didn’t know what you meant.”  Those are just excuses.  He always blames things on his health, claiming that his condition affects his memory and that he can’t hear good in one ear.  That may be partially true, but nobody can forget that much.  I can tell him something and 5 minutes later, he claims he can’t remember me saying it.  That is not true.  I told him that if his health is that bad, how do you even remember what to do for your boss when he tells you what to do.  He works part-time, as do I, to supplement our disability, but he keeps most of the money he makes for what he wants.  His health is not as bad as he claims when he makes excuses like that all the time with me.  I know he does have some partial deafness in one ear, but using that as an excuse, when he doesn’t want to do something for me, is not right.  And I do not ask that much of him.  
I do love my husband very much, which is the main reason why I get so stressed out and frustrated.  I worry about him too much.  I remind him to take his meds cause sometimes he does forget.  But he never thinks about whether or not I have taken mine.  We both have meds we have to take everyday.  Sometimes I forget to take mine because I am too concerned about whether he took his or not.  
Well thank you for taking the time to listen to me, but you haven’t really told me anything that I did not already know or have tried.  I was trying to seek “godly counsel” as the bible says to do.  I have been married for 30 years the first time and going on 13 years this time so, trust me, I am not a fickle or unsupportive wife.  I take marriage very seriously and I stay committed.  I know there are going to be arguments and disagreements between couples.  That is to be expected.  It is when it becomes one-sided and where the couple are more like just roommates than husband and wife that it becomes a problem.      

 

On Mon, Mar 7, 2022 at 11:15 AM NeedEncouragement.com / Bill <billgreguska@aol.com> wrote:
Hi Penny,
I am glad that you are a Christian who love God very much, that is so important. As Christians, we are called to be like Christ. Having said that, what would Jesus want you to do concerning your marriage situation.

I am only hearing your side of the story, but it what really matters is what God calls us to do. In your case being your husbands wife, you are called to submit to him.

Ephesians 5:22-23Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior.
 
If what you have been doing up until this point has not been working, try to respect you husband and not insist on your own ways. He being a good husband will respond better to that, compared to fussing and arguing with him.
 
I am not saying that what he is saying or doing is right, he would need to take it to God himself. But you emailed me, and all I have to work with is you, and what you can do to make things better. The answer is doing God’s will and loving and respecting your husband. Do these things and you will begin to see a difference in your husband within a relatively short time. Be patient and keep praying to God!
 
If what I have shared has been of help to you, feel free to email me back if you have any questions.
 
God bless you and your marriage,
Bill Greguska
Luke 10:27 He answered, “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind’; and, ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’”

—–Original Message—–

Subject: Questions
Message Body:
Hi,  I am a Christian who loves God very much.  I just have a few issues with stress and frustration.  A lot of it is triggered by my husband, who is also a believer but we just don’t see eye to eye on a lot of things.  I did not see anything on your website related to marriage counseling.  What I really need is just someone to talk to about the things that stress me out because it does absolutely no good at all to talk to my husband.  It only causes arguments.  Sometimes it may be small unimportant things but sometimes it will be something significant that I can’t get him to listen to me about.  So I get frustrated and he absolutely will not budge on his opinion even when it is clear he is wrong.  He does not know how to admit he is wrong.  I think it might help me if I just had someone else to vent to rather than him so that it doesn’t become a big argument between us.  I can start to just talk to him about something and somehow it gets twisted into a big argument.  And he doesn’t see a problem so I don’t think he would even talk to a counselor.  He acts as if there nothing wrong. 
We are both on disability so I can’t afford to pay for counseling.  I need free counseling if it is available.  Thanks!

Hi Sarai,
You need to stop and regroup yourself.
  1. Stick close to God.
  2. Stick close to your Bible study.
  3. Offer your husband a deal stating if you do XYZ then he would agree to not proceed in the divorce.
  4. You acknowledged your sin to me in your email, make sure you acknowledge your sin to God. 1 John 1:9If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.
  5. Once you confess your sins to God, stop beating yourself up and accept God’s forgiveness.
  6. Forgive yourself and pray that your husband will do the same.
  7. Your husband may not forgive you right away, but as long as God has. God’s forgiveness is real, yet there are sometimes consequences to our sins.
  8. Remember that your husband does not necessarily want to hear scriptures at this point, he need to see with his eyes and ears that you are serious by the way you handle yourself.
  9. Take care of your health, eat healthy, exercise, sleep 7-8 hours, and stay close to your support system.
  10. What are one or two things that your husband has been complaining to you about. Show him that you are serious and do what he has requested if it is something Godly.
  11. It is not over, there is hope. God can work in his heart to forgive you. A little pleading and begging mercy from your husband may be what is need also beside prayer!
  12. Keep in mind, that your husband is in the drivers seat, if you want to keep the marriage alive which is sounds like you do, then you NEED TO WIN HIM BACK!
Be strong and wise. Keep praying and I will do the same!
Bill Greguska


NeedEncouragement.com

Call or text 800-633-3446 or Chat Here

—–Original Message—–
Subject: Re: NeedEncouragement.com “Counseling help with divorce”

Dear Mr. G 

Thank you for the encouraging words. There is a reason why God brings me back to this scripture.  I have bible study and this is the same scripture we have been studying.  My tongue put me into the  position I am in now. My impatience and my anger. I hurt my children and my husband. 
I hurt my husband to the core with my words. I was a horrible wife by taking his manhood and disrespecting him since day one. I never allowed him to be the king of his castle. 
For some reason I had lots of anger towards him. In my perception he never did things right including around the house, With the kids, at his job, I would get upset bc he was too slow to do things, and especially around my family. I was a big bully. A very mean bully. To a point that he became submissive to me. I would tell him that I wore the pants in our home. 
His drinking would get me upset too. I accept all faults for the wrong that I have done. God is working on me and through me by becoming a better person, wife, mother, daughter, teacher and friends. 
We have been married for 10 years. He already served me with divorce papers on  Feb 16. I am in search of a lawyer and my time is cutting short. I keep putting myself off in finding a lawyer bc I can’t believe this is happening to me. Boy was my husband was really serious this time. 
He doesn’t want to go to counseling. I tell him let God fix our marriage. Let’s do this for our son. He is checked out. He doesn’t want to. He’s so hurt from me that his heart is so hard of stone. Anything I say or do is tuned around. He said he. Ñ ant gust me and I’m just a manipulator.  Thats why I have to watch what I say to do. His words are the following. Each year that we have been together I have lost 10 percent of my love towards you. It’s now 10 years so now it’s 100 percent i do not have love for you.- wow how devastating well This is the similar way I would treat him. I deserve these words. 

I do not want to get divorced so I have been creative. I leave him leave him  notes and scriptures. He works from home so I leave hearts with words. Letting him now that I love him.  I keep telling him I’m it gonna give up. I will stay loyal for my family. 

Sarai

 

On Mar 8, 2022, at 3:46 PM, NeedEncouragement.com / Bill <billgreguska@aol.com> wrote:

Hi Sari,
I hear what you are saying and it brings me back to when my wife left the house for 2 years and then finally divorced me.
I am not going to sugar coat it Sari, this might possibly be one of the hardest things you will go through in your life.
It is not over yet, if you believe in God, there is always hope. I suggest that you guard your heart and realize that this time in your marriage, you husband may not be someone to trust at this point unfortunately.
I can only assume that you have gotten a lawyer to represent you.
My recommendation that I got from my pastor Ron Sauer and his wife Sue Sauer, that they told me not to initiate a divorce. That is why it lasted 2 years. God hates divorce, and so should we, so that is why I was given wise counsel not to initiate it.
I also recommend that you pick a close friend who will support you during this time. Unfortunately you are heading possibly into a war zone and it is going to devastate you, if in fact he starts the process. Guard you mouth and emotions.
I also recommend that you be a Godly woman though the coming months. Keep your emotions under control. Avoid drinking if possible or at least do not get drunk.
I also recommend that you get some exercise, make sure you eat healthy, and get 7-8 hours of sleep each night. If you have children, do NOT us them as pawns in this battle. Keep praying to God that your husbands heart may soften, although
I have briefed you through my own personal experience and counsel from my pastor and his wife. Contact you pastor. Do not let your husband trap you into any arguments. It will be difficult, but you can do it. Even though it may be difficult for you, try to remember the man that asked you to marry him, because that man is still inside him, lets pray that he come out…

KEEP PRAYING AND STAND FIRM NO MATTER WHAT YOUR HUSBAND SAYS OR DOES KEEP THE FOLLOWING SCRIPTURE IN MIND.

Ephesians 6:12-17 For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. 13 Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. 14 Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, 15 and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. 16 In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. 17 Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.
If what I have shared has been helpful to you, and if you have any questions, feel free to email me back. I pray that you take this to God every day, and ask God for His help, comfort, wisdom and strength! God bless you and your husband!
Bill Greguska


NeedEncouragement.com

Call or text 800-633-3446 or Chat Here

—–Original Message—–

Subject: Counseling help with divorce
Message Body:
Hello  my family really needs Jesus. Divorce is on its way to take over our home. Please help.

Dear Bill,

it‘s actually different from what you‘ve assumed. Maybe I should have been more specific about why I want this person back in my life.

From the few times we‘ve talked, I felt how caring, friendly and funny he is.

If I were after his looks, I‘d actually say this person was the complete opposite of ‘my type’, though I don’t really care about what‘s on the outside.

At first, I honestly wasn’t too interested in the conversation and just continued talking to him out of politeness.

I realized weeks later what an opportunity I’d missed. He possibly could have become a great friend who actually cares, since my longtime friends haven’t treated me as nicely as he has in a few hours.

I understand that I may sound naïve, but part of me just doesn’t want to give up hope, the hope that what I‘d like to happen is also what God wants for me.

Though at the moment it doesn’t seem like most things work in my favor, as I barely have anyone to talk to or any friends left.

I know that God knows what He is doing, that everything has a purpose and life is never easy, but I can’t deny that at the moment I feel like I am lost and it doesn’t seem to get much better.

Anyway, thanks again. I truly appreciate it and I hope this time I can make myself a bit clearer, so that my thoughts can be better to understand.

Now that I found God again last year, this situation won’t make me part ways with Him and, of course, I‘ll continue to pray daily. And like you said, God will answer my prayer and I won’t stop following Him.

Sincerely, Sofia

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Betreff: Re: NeedEncouragement.com “Starting to doubt my prayer”

Hi Sofia,
I read your email, and I noticed that you only met this person a few times. To be very honest with you if I may do so, it appears to me that you were attracted by his looks, and the way he handled himself. In other words, it is very, very possible that you were infatuated with him, kind of like a puppy love. If this is true, which I think it is, I would suggest that you keep moving forward and pray that God brings a Godly man into your life, one that you can not only be physically attracted to, but also intellectually, spiritually connected with. Yes, there is a factor of being physically attracted, but that is not what you really want or need.
As of tomorrow morning when you wake up, have your eyes of what God’s will is for your life, and who He wants in your life. If by any chance your friend from two years ago, pops up back into your life, you can decide then what to do. In the mean time, feel free to date and I am sure that God will answer your prayer one way or another if you are praying and following the Lord, be content with what/who He provides for you.
Bill Greguska


NeedEncouragement.com

Call or text 800-633-3446 or Chat Here

 

—–Original Message—–

Subject: Starting to doubt my prayer
Message Body:
Hello,
Something’s been bothering me for two years now. I have met someone a few times but never got the chance to exchange contact information. I don’t think I‘ll ever see this person again and it‘s bothering me.
Last year I started praying daily and am praying almost every day to meet that person again.
I trust in God, but sometimes I wonder if it shouldn’t be that I see them again. I miss them very much, but at times I think that God maybe doesn’t want what I‘d like to happen.
How can I know what‘s right? I still think about this person daily. I wonder if God hears my prayer but thinks it‘s the wrong thing for me or if it‘ll just take some more time to happen.
Would God really let me waste my thoughts and time thinking about this person if it were for nothing? I don’t want to give up hope, but it‘s making me frustrated and sad.
I hope to get some help and want to thank you for reading this.
Sincerely, Sofia

Hi Sam,
I think you need to consider not only pleading and begging her, you need to show her what she is expecting out of you. What ever reason your wife wants you to stay at your parents house, tells me that she is not a happy camper. Remember that a happy wife makes for a happy life. Your job as the man in your marriage is to provide and make her happy. Ask her what she want out of you? What ever it may be, if it is not against God’s will, it ought to be on your list of things to start trying to do. Am I making sense to you?
Right now for a visual example, it sounds like you are on a scale from 0 – 10 maybe around a 4 if you are lucky. She is in the drivers seat sort of speak, but once you gain her trust back and prove to her what she is complaining about that you do or do not do, then once that happens, you will be walking on the same level ground once again. But I would highly suggest to you that you keep praying and be on your BEST behavior, not temporarily, but permanently! It sounds like you really love her, not you have to show how much you love her by what you say and do, but mostly what you do and how you show her that you changed.
Matthew 7:7-8 “Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.
For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened.
Bill Greguska


NeedEncouragement.com

Call or text 800-633-3446 or Chat Here

—–Original Message—–
Subject: Re: NeedEncouragement.com “Addiction to attention from females”

Thank you for the verses. Both fit this well. I have almost no temptation right now at all. But I will save them for the future as a reminder. Mostly though, I will do as you suggest and turn to God whenever I have any temptation. All day right now I pray and talk to God. I’m reading the bible as well. I am very scared my wife might not take me back. I keep praying for her to see enough hope to give me a chance. I try not to think of her leaving me and what I would do with myself because all I care about is her and my daughter. I was so foolish. And prideful. I will do a better job checking my ego from now on. This week I am staying at my parents house as my wife suggested. It’s been maybe the worst week of my life. U don’t want to imagine ever living without my wife. But I don’t know what I deserve any more. And she deserves the world. She is the best woman I’ve ever met. Sensitive and loves me in a way I’ve never been loved. 



Subject: Re: NeedEncouragement.com “Addiction to attention from females”

Hi Sam,
Do not get discouraged if temptation knocks on your door, BUT rather run to God and ask for His mercy and strength.
You will be alright! I am praying for you. Keep Praying for your self and thank God for how He is working in your life!
Matthew 26:41 “Watch and pray so that you will not fall into temptation. The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak.”
John 16:33 “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”
God loves you, and I am proud of you Brother! But more importantly God sees your heart and is with you! I am praying for you Sam.
Bill Greguska


NeedEncouragement.com

Call or text 800-633-3446 or Chat Here

—–Original Message—–
Subject: Re: NeedEncouragement.com “Addiction to attention from females”

Thank you for being so kind to me. Even when I feel like I deserve nothing and am not sure who I am anymore. I used to always think of myself as a good man. Had my flaws but good overall for sure. Then I did this. To my favorite person in this world. I always thought she was a gift from God because I had prayed to find a soul mate for years before finally meeting her. Now I feel as I slapped God in the face by my actions. And betrayed my wife. Who loves me as no one ever has. If I lose her I don’t know what to do with my life. All I desire now is an opportunity to live for my wife and my daughter. I am praying all day but I am very scared that I might lose my wife. And I know I will never meet anyone remotely close to as special if I do, and I don’t even want to ever try to. Please pray for me and my wife. And that I might get a chance to be the man God wants me to be, and remain her husband. I am fully committed to this path and would do anything for her. 

 


From: NeedEncouragement.com / Bill <billgreguska@aol.com>
Subject: Re: NeedEncouragement.com “Addiction to attention from females”

Hi Sam,
Just to make you feel better, you are not the only man in the USA or world for that matter who has desires for women. Unfortunately even in the church there is a problem with purity, but with help from the online bible course based on addiction. Stick with it, and remember to purify your mind and bounce your eyes off of women when you happen to see them in society, on TV and movies.
I am proud of you and I will be praying for you and victory over temptation. https://needencouragement.com/victory-over-pornography/
God will bless you for your faithfulness!
Bill Greguska
Luke 10:27 He answered, “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind’; and, ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’”

—–Original Message—–
Subject: Re: NeedEncouragement.com “Addiction to attention from females”

I have been talking to God every day. Through out the day. There is no question that I desire most to be with my wife and child and live a virtuous life. I have started a bible course online based around addiction and like it so far. I have committed myself to being completely faithful to my wife and pray she will give me an opportunity to live my words. I guess ultimately I need to figure out how to control my urges if they ever re appear



Subject: Re: NeedEncouragement.com “Addiction to attention from females”

Hi Sam,
I appreciate your transparency and honesty, although you know what your are facing and I am not sure if you asked the Lord to help you in this area of your life. I am sure you understand the consequences to what you are saying so I am not sure what you want me to say besides the fact that you are married, you are having a baby soon, and that you realize it is wrong to have desires for other women.
Proverbs 6:25 Do not lust in your heart after her beauty or let her captivate you with her eyes.
Have you ever reached out to anyone about this before? If so, what did they tell you? And did you do it? Does your pastor know about your situation?
Matthew 5:28But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.
May God make Himself more personal to you, and lead you away from these temptations you are experiencing
I remember a pastor once told me that you can not help but see beautiful women where ever you go, looking once is not a sin, but when you keep looking again and again, that is where the trouble is. You know what is at steak, you are going to have to decide in your heart and mind what you are going to do. I pray that you start to ask God for his help, strength, and His wisdom to conquer your fleshly desires. If anything I said has been of help to you, feel free to email me back.
I pray that God blesses you and strengthen you, and keeps your family together,
Bill Greguska
Luke 10:27 He answered, “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind’; and, ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’”

—–Original Message—–

Subject: Addiction to attention from females
Message Body:
I need someone to talk to about problems I have sometimes in regards to craving attention from other women. I am a married man with a baby on the way and am in danger of losing my marriage.

Hi Melanie,
You seem to be on the right track in wanting to understand how to read the Bible and also how to forgive yourself from the things of the past.
First of all it would help you a great deal if you had a church to attend and have fellowship with other believers. https://needencouragement.com/find-a-good-church/
As far as leaning how to understand how to read the Bible, I suggest that you do not read it like a typical book from cover to cover, but rather I suggest reading the book of John, Proverbs, and James to start off with. Try not to think of it as the more you read the better, but rather reach each word, sentence, paragraph, and chapter as something to savor and chew on. https://needencouragement.com/how-to-read-the-bible/
As far as forgiving yourself, I suggest that you first ask God for His forgiveness, then you will be able to forgive yourself. Here is a link to our site that talks about forgiveness. https://needencouragement.com/forgiven/
If what I have shared has been of help to you and if you have any questions, feel free to email me back.
God bless you and I pray He makes Himself known to you like never before!
Bill Greguska


NeedEncouragement.com

Call or text 800-633-3446 or Chat Here

Hi Robert,
It is good to hear back from you with a good report! Praise God!!!
God sees what you are doing in your attempt to honor and be obedient to Him. Your wife can be a different story because she is human, you need to show her with your actions and your words that you are a new man, which she will see in time.
God had already forgiven you, yet sometime in the forgiveness that we receive, there still are consequences to our past behaviors at times. Be strong to keep doing what you know for sure that is right. No matter how God will orchestrate your situation, remember that you want to please God in all you say and do.
I am very proud of you that you are fighting the “Good Fight” Be strong and keep up the good work!
God bless you and please keep me informed of your progress, I am sure God has some good plans for you in your life, and you are starting to see what I am talking about! I will continue to pray that you grow closer to God and that your desires and His will will prevail.
Bill Greguska


NeedEncouragement.com

Call or text 800-633-3446 or Chat Here

—–Original Message—–
Subject: Victory

I have had victory for 11 days.  Nothing has changed in my marriage though.   I’m doing my best not to let that discourage me.  

—–Original Message—–
Subject: NeedEncouragement.com “I’m so lost”

Subject: I’m so lost
Message Body:
Hello I am seeking a safe place to learn and understand how to read the Bible and forgive my past selves and get my life on track.

 


Hi Candy,
I am glad you chose to write in for advice, it is honorable that you want to please your father in this matter of dating, but more importantly, what does your Heavenly Father think of your dating this man? (when you say significant other, it almost implies that you are living with your friend. If that is true, then I would suggest that you make different arrangement to live separately, if that is the case). If you want to please God, then you need to do God’s will not what the world does.
Sorry for the side track, but it was important for me to mention that to you.
  1. The first and best way to get understanding of what to do is to pray to God about it each day until you get a prompting of insight from God leading you one way or another.
  2. Another great way to help you make a wise choice is to get wise Christian counsel from your pastor, or other Christian friend you trust.
  3. One way that I use to help me make big important decisions is to write on a piece of paper the pro and the cons. That will help you get some understanding of the weight of each of the items on each side of the list.
  4. I would suggest that you have a heart to heart talk with your father, ask him some questions and tell him how you feel.
You need to put off any plans about marring him until you get a clear answer.
I hope what I have shared has been of help to you, if it has, and you wish to email me back if you have any questions about what I shared, please do so. I will pray that you take this situation to God in pray.
God bless you with wisdom that you need.
James 1:5 If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.
Bill Greguska


NeedEncouragement.com

Call or text 800-633-3446 or Chat Here

—–Original Message—–

Subject: Relationship
Message Body:
Hi! My name is Candy 🙂 I have a significant other who just accepted Jesus in his heart. Which is a great thing right? The only thing is.. this person and I have been dating for like five years, but sometimes I wonder if he would be the one that I will marry him. Long story short, I dated someone years ago but they weren’t a follower of Christ. I remember praying to God about him and the more I prayed about my ex, the more my ex drifted away from me. I’ve been doing the same with my current relationship, although nothing bad has happened between us but sometimes I question if that’s the person God would approve me marrying him. There would be times where I prayed for him that he would one day and this year he just did. Long story short, my dad’s side of the family knows his mom for over many years, but the thing is.. my father has never liked his family because of so much history they had. It has nothing to do with me or him because we’ve never been dragged into their problems but I remember my dad telling me that I should never date his son, which is the one I’m with right now, because he thinks that all of his family is the same.
Although God did give us free will to choose, but I’m just worried that my father will never accept my significant other in his heart at all. Plus, I sometimes question if God would approve us marrying each other.. and if He doesn’t.. I just have to trust His plans. My question is… what should I do when I have doubts like this?

Hi Phumudzo,
I would love to encourage you, but I would need to know what you are struggling with specifically?
Here are two pages that you can check out before you email me back.
God bless you,
Bill Greguska


NeedEncouragement.com

Call or text 800-633-3446 or Chat Here

—–Original Message—–

Subject: Anger management issues
Message Body:
I would really appreciate if I can get one person to help me with anger anxiety depression and low self esteem I am a mother of 2 not working I receive grant money I cannot afford to pay a therapist but I desperately need someone to help me please. I would really appreciate if you can help me.
Regards
Phumudzo Lydia mandiwana

Hi Karen,
I am glad you have reached out for help. I think I can help you best by asking you some rhetorical questions which I think will help you get out of the pit that you are presently in.
  1. Have you been praying each morning?
  2. Have you been reading your Bible each morning?
  3. Have you been getting enough exercise each day?
  4. Have you been getting 7-8 hours of sleep each night?
  5. Have you been in contact with family and friends?
  6. Have you been eating healthy foods each day?
  7. Have you been drinking enough water each day?
  8. Are you willing to take small chances to try something new?
  9. Are you okay with taking baby step for a little while?
  10. Are you eager to get you health back?
  11. Are you open minded, willing to try?
  12. Do you have a prayer partner?
  13. Do you have a pastor, or church?
  14. What is the biggest thing in your way right now that you can do something about?
As a missionary, I would imagine there are people around you that you can share your thoughts and feeling with.
Here is a page from our website that can be of help to you.
If what I have shared has been of help to you, please feel free to email me back if you have any questions about what I shared. I will pray right not that you can get your eyes back on to the Lord and get out of this fog you are temporarily in at the present time.
God bless you may you trust that He has a plan for your life. Keep praying!
Bill Greguska

NeedEncouragement.com

Call or text 800-633-3446 or Chat Here

—–Original Message—–
Subject: NeedEncouragement.com “Depression”

Subject: Depression
Message Body:
Hello,
I have been trying to find Christian counseling for over a year that I can afford. I am actually a missionary, and I live off of donations. I can’t afford the counseling right now, but I am on a steady decline. I’m even contemplating leaving missions for a while to deal with this. I am losing interest and motivation in everything. I’m not suicidal, and the only self-harm I inflict is binge eating. I gained over 30lbs over COVID, and this has increased physical health problems as I have chronic allergies and am an asthmatic. Not severe yet, but affecting.
I should be able to overcome this, but I just can’t. I almost want to give up. But I do love my work. Being a missionary was my dream since childhood. I don’t want to loose this blessing. God’s carried me through so much already. But I experienced a ‘trigger’ in 2019, and it has really shaken me up. Over 20 years of suppressed trauma since my childhood, including an extremely violent experience when I was 10, has come to the surface, and I don’t know how to deal with it. The isolation of COVID following that trigger left me to myself too long with almost nothing to do. And now I just want to stay in bed, eat, and watch movies all the time.
I already made the decision to leave my current mission base for another location. My current base focuses mostly on admin and training. There isn’t much opportunity for mercy ministry unless you travel to other locations. So, I thought I’d travel to a base that focused on mercy ministry and get myself focusing on helping others physically again. I think this would be good for me. But what I don’t want to do is to get so busy helping people that I just suppress everything again. I need to deal with this and, at least, learn how to manage any future triggers in a healthy way.

Hi Mary,
There is a lot on your heart and mind. Have you been praying about these situation for a long time now?
Have faith that the things that you need, God will supply in His own special way and in His own special time. Be patient!
Sometimes anxiety and depression can result from not taking care of your health.
Have you been eating healthy? https://needencouragement.com/overeating/
Have you been getting enough exercise?
Have you been getting 7-8 hours of sleep each night?
Have you been avoiding alcohol and drugs? https://needencouragement.com/alcohol-and-drugs/
Do you have any unconfessed sin in your life?
Are you holding on to a grudge or resentment?
I pray for you, and your parents, your husband, your sister, and for salvation for all your family members.
I hope what I have shared has been of some help to you. If you feel a need to email me back, please feel free to do so.
Prayer is a valuable tool that many Christians do not really understand!
1 Peter 5:7 Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.
God bless you,

—–Original Message—–

Subject: Urgent prayer request
Message Body:
Please pray for my fear,  anxiety & depression. I’m having a hard time starting a diet & I have many health problems. Please pray for my 81 year old father & my 80 year old mother with all their health problems. Please pray for my husband’s alcoholism & other addictions. Please pray for my sisters sexual addiction she’s having unmarried sex. Please pray for the rest of my family for their ungodliness. Thank You so much & please email me back as soon as possible!

Hi Stephan,
I am glad that you have reached out for some help and encouragement. It is wonderful that you have been a Christian for years. I take it that you have a church you attend, and a pastor that you talk with.
As far as you having some mental oppression issues with fear and anxiety. We all have been through a lot with Covid 19, so your fears and anxiety are not that abnormal. Yet, we need to remember that God does not give us a spirit of timidity, but of strength and power.
If you could share with me what the biggest hurdle you are trying to get over, I would love to help you. You can email me back and I will try to get back to you within 24-48 hours or less depending on my schedule.
I would like you to pray about your situation first. Take you concerns to God in prayer and then email me back.
God bless you!

—–Original Message—–

Subject: Fear and anxiety
Message Body:
Hi. I have been a Christian for years. I am keen to have someone as a mentor for me as I am battling with some mental oppression issues with fear and anxiety. Thanks. Stephen.

Hi Sophia,
You are right when you say that Christians can not be possessed, but Christians can be affected by evil spirits.
Have you been praying regularly?
Do you have any unconfessed sin in your life? If so, you need to confess your sins to God. 1 John 1:9.
Make sure you are not using street drugs or alcohol. Keep praying and trust that God is your Lord and Savior.
God bless you,

—–Original Message—–

Subject: Demonic dreams
Message Body:
Hello!
I’ll keep this straight to the point – for about a year now I’ve had very vivid dreams. I was saved in January 2021. Sometimes my dreams can get pretty dark and disturbing. However one that I had last night really has scared me.
I was in my room and trying to avoid eye contact with a demon but couldn’t resist and ended up getting possessed by them. I looked myself in the mirror and tried to cast the demon out but it didn’t work I woke up right after. I even tried in Jesus name, and I even pray before I go to bed for protection over my dreams.
I’m scared because I thought Christian’s can’t get possessed. I trust that Jesus Christ died for my sins but is it possible I’ve lost my salvation( or perhaps that I was never saved? Is that was this dream is saying?
Please let me know what this means.

Hi Donald,
God’s word says a lot about God’s faithfulness, for example Deuteronomy 31:6 Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.”
Since you know that you run away from good relationships, that would be a great thing to work on. First, I would work on your relationship with Jesus. https://needencouragement.com/get-right-with-god/
I am not sure what you mean when you said, “Mother death from birth”
I hope what I have shared has been of help to you. If you want to email me back concerning anything I mentioned, or have anything else you would like to mention, please feel free to do so.
God bless you,

—–Original Message—–

Subject: Mother death from birth
Message Body:
I know God word says He will never leave me or forsake me, but I run away from good relationship.

Hi Destiny,
You can not talk anyone into accepting Jesus as their Lord and Savior, but you can point out to them in the right time, what God has done for you in your life and why you believe.
You can speak up when they are wanting to include you in with something you know is sinful and tell them in a respectful way that you do not believe in doing (what ever it may be?)
Pray about it and the Holy Spirit will give you the right words to say at the right time to say it, but do not engage in arguments or debates.
I hope and pray that you are getting along with your sisters and parents.
—–Original Message—–


It feels like a lot of my friends are giving up on God. I try talking to them, but sometimes it feels like it makes it worse. Why is everybody giving up on him? There’s days that I want to, but I I know it’s not right. I don’t know what to say to them, because I feel the same way. What should I tell them?

Hi Guillermo,
I encourage you to keep doing your very best, even if your wife does not appreciate you the way she ought to. Be good to her as if you were doing it on to the Lord.
I can understand that this hard for you, but do not give up. With God all things are possible. https://needencouragement.com/improve-your-marriage/
When she accused you of your sins, did you admit them to her? If not, then that is what you need to do. If you did confess them, then the ball is in her court to forgive you. Pray that God convicts her of her unforgivness so that your marriage can be restored. Make sure you confess and ask her for her forgiveness.

1 John 1:9 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.

God bless you,
Bill Pray

—–Original Message—–
Subject: Re: NeedEncouragement.com “Marriage issue”

Thank you very much for responding to me and your encouragement. We have been in christian counseling for 6 months but that didn’t work, I have only see her 3 times during the sessions but all she did was to accuse me for my sins and mistakes of the last 30 years, some of them real some of them unreal. For most of them I had already asked her for forgiveness. 

Guillermo 

 

Hi Guillermo,
I can sense that this is very hard on you, which is very understandable. I am sorry that you are going through this, but keep in mind that with God all things are possible.
Have you tried to contact her by phone or mail or email?
My wife moved out for 2 years which was very hard on me so I can understand your predicament.
My pastor and his wife told me to keep her and all things in an open palm and let God decide what will happen.
In the mean time, please take care of your physical and emotional health. Get some exercise, eat healthy, get 7-8 hours sleep each night, avoid alcohol, but most importantly stay close to God in prayer. Read your Bible each morning when you wake up before or after you pray.
If what I have shared has been of help to you, please feel free to email me back if you have any questions.
May God bless you and comfort you and give you strength.

—–Original Message—–

Subject: Marriage issue
Message Body:
I am in depression since last October when my wife who was married to me for 27 years left me due to several unresolved issues, she refuses to forgive.

Hi Timothy,
If you keep it simple, you have mentioned that you have committed sexual sin, so my answer to you is found in the Bible.
1 John 1:9If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.
 
If you are a follower of Jesus Christ, your sin can be forgiven, yet with all sin, there are sometimes consequences. If you are referring to your girl friend, the honorable thing I encourage you to do if that is the case is that you make yourself responsible if she gets pregnant.
 
Timothy, I would pray about this and see what the Lord wants you to specifically do.
Bill Greguska

NeedEncouragement.com

—–Original Message—–

Subject: Sexual sin
Message Body:
“If a man seduces a virgin who is not engaged to anyone and has sex with her, he must pay the customary bride price and marry her. 17 But if her father refuses to let him marry her, the man must still pay him an amount equal to the bride price of a virgin.”
I committed sexual sin do i need to verify Virginity

Hi Timothy,
You are a wise man to inquire about your salvation. That is something between you and God, but if you are concerned that your sin has erased your salvation, I would not worry about that, BUT I would firmly tell you that you need to confess your sins to God and turn from your sin and get right with God again!
1 John 1:9 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.
 
Timothy, Do not let Satan tell you in your head that what you have done in the past negates your salvation, yet I am sure that you have discovered the consequences of your sin has happened, but God can restore you in His time! 
Joel 2:25“I will repay you for the years the locusts have eaten— the great locust and the young locust, the other locusts and the locust swarm— my great army that I sent among you.
What you have done obs not pleased God, but He will forgive you and you and regain your relationship with Him as of TODAY!  That is my prayer for you!

—–Original Message—–

Subject: Am I truly saved
Message Body:
I was Born and raised in a Christian home.
All my life as a kid I went to church and was devoted to Him.
At high school I fell into porn and masturbation and in college I fell into also and weed and eventually sexual sin…
I then began to read the Bible and I found out that I had broken every commandment… I was also confused if I’m truly a Christian.

Hi Jesutofunmi,
Do you have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ? If you do not, I encourage you to start one today!
If you can be a little more specific, I could give you some advice, but you only said you feel guilty and possibly depressed.
1 John 1:9 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.
Bill Greguska

NeedEncouragement.com

—–Original Message—–

Subject: I’m feeling so guilty
Message Body:
I think I’m so guilty up to the point of depression

Hi Dez,
You did not talk with me, you most likely talked with someone from 800-633-3446.
Thank you for your generosity, but I can not accept your donation.
Bill Greguska

NeedEncouragement.com

—–Original Message—–

 

Subject: Donation
Message Body:
I would like to give a donation to your ministry.  It was really a blessing to me and I enjoyed the man of God I spoke with.  Thank you .  I feel a whole lot better and I will be calling again.  Once again, you really blessed me tonight.

 


Hi Ben,
I am not a licensed professional counselor, but I have been a Christian since June 1986.
If you have any questions I will be happy to to point you to the Lord.
Here are a couple of links that can be of help to you.
Do not give up! God bless you and your wife!
Bill Greguska

NeedEncouragement.com

—–Original Message—–

Subject: Free Counseling or Faith Based / Christ Centered Life Coaching
Message Body:
Hello,
Thanks for your site and service!  I found it beginning my search for counseling resources.  I’m A Christian that’s been married for 15 years but going through a rough patch personally and in the marriage.  I do have a couple names of counselors that were given to me through Focus on The Family’s counseling help phone line (contacted one about setting up an appointment).  Do you know of any Biblical based / Christ centered counseling or coaching type services or ministries that you can do more than an initial consultation for free?  I’m just thinking that for myself talking with someone regularly on numerous occasions will be more helpful than a one time thing but with professional licensed counselors it can also be pretty expensive. 
Thanks for any info and for your time!

Hi Ruth,
Have you prayed about this situation at all?
If not, I advise you to pray about it and give your parents another chance by humbly talking to them. You do not want to sever your relationship with your boyfriend, but at the same time, you must be old enough to make your mind up. There are consequences to all our decisions, if you want to push and get your will done, there will be natural consequences.
Try to keep a level head and take your time to figure this out.
Ephesians 6:2 “Honor your father and mother”—which is the first commandment with a promise—
Genesis 2:24 That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.
Bill Greguska

NeedEncouragement.com

—–Original Message—–

Subject: Relationship counseling
Message Body:
Hello…
I need counsel and prayer. I am in an relationship with one of the members in my church but my parents are against it. I can’t express myself to anyone as nobody wants to listen to me or him.  He and myself had some issues in the past. He has left all his unhealthy lifestyle for the past 2 years which I helped him get through it by using the word of God. We knew each other growing up in church. He has loved me for 14 years. In 2020, he proposed to me. But both his and my parents don’t want us together. My parents don’t want me to get involved with any boy in our church, plus his parents don’t want to hurt my parents so they forced/threatened him to get engaged to a girl who is not a believer in the Lord Jesus Christ(staunch Roman Catholic). Certain people spoke about him to my Father which was all in the past and many falsely accused him. So, my father doesn’t want us together. If Jesus can forgive people of their sin why can’t people understand and forgive or even listen to the other side? I can’t bear to watch him get married to someone else because I’m deeply in love him. He has always treated me with respect and he has protected my name when others were trying to speak about me. He said, ‘ If they force me to get married to any girl, the very next day I will divorce her and I’ll come back to you as I love only you. In this situation, I don’t know what to do? the only thing I can do, is to pray. I don’t have a voice to express my thoughts or emotions to anyone. Please help me. I need counsel.

Hi John,
If I were you, I would pray about this situation to God, not just once or twice, but each day when you wake up and also when you put your head on the pillow each night, and of course, throughout the day. Try to network by reaching out to people and places that can be of help to you.
The next thing I would do is to do some homework to where you can find what you are looking for in terms of housing and employment.
One thought I like you to consider is that in my 62 years of life, I have been through a lot, and I imagine you have too. My point is that God has never left me, always provided food and shelter, and has given me the spiritual strength to make it through all the things I have gotten myself into or has happened to me by other.
1 Peter 5:7 Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.
Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

 

Keep your eyes on the Lord, not the storm. Have faith, and you will get through this as you have done in many other situations in your life! I will pray that God opens doors for you, and He shuts other doors that could waste your time and energy!
God bless you!
Bill Greguska

NeedEncouragement.com

—–Original Message—–
Subject: Re: NeedEncouragement.com “Looking for spiritual counseling”

I’ll give you a summary and maybe you can point me to what I need. 

My anxiety is making it hard to concentrate. This past spring I had to resign from my job due to a serious kidney infection that put me in the hospital. I lost my housing during this time as well. I’m in a shelter and working part time now. The shelter is only temporary, I need a better housing situation and add to that a better job to pay for an apartment or room somewhere by the middle of November, otherwise I’ll literally be living on the street. This is causing me nightmares and I’m very, very, very frightened and my anxiety is off the charts. Please pray for the answers I need. And thank you. God bless you.

 

Hi John,

I’m glad you reached all for some encouragement, all you need to do is simply let me know the biggest issue you’re dealing with right now and I will respond to it by pointing you to Jesus and his word.
I’ve been a Christian since 1986 and hopefully I can share something that might help to you also.
God bless you,
Bill Greguska 
Subject: Looking for spiritual counseling
Message Body:
Can you refer me to a spirituality mature Christian for counseling? I’ve been a believer for many years but I’m in quicksand it feels like. The don’t have to be licensed.

Hi Miranda,
As beautiful as marriage can be, you both must understand it is still hard work. Since you emailed me, I will speak to you. I encourage you to submit to your husband and respect him, maybe some things he says or does is not worthy of respect, but your job still is to respect him. You must keep praying each morning when you wake up and throughout your day. Keep taking your marriage to God in prayer!
Now I will speak to your husband. He needs to love you just like Christ loved the church. He needs to sacrifice what he wants in order to show his love for you. He may not be anywhere near this requirement, but you and I pray he starts to grow towards that goal.
I can help you to a point, but the best thing for the two of you is to talk to your pastor or a counselor soon. The sooner, the better. Unless you want to keep hurting each other, then do not bother. But I am telling you the truth. It sounds like you guys need help. The help you need is to have someone sit in the same room with you and hash out what has gone on and how you can get the train back on track. It is possible because God’s word says with God, all things are possible.
I hope what I have shared has been of help. If you have any questions about what I have shared, feel free to email me back. But make sure you get an appointment with your pastor or a counselor ASAP, preferably by Monday.
Ephesians 5:21-25 Instructions for Christian Households
21 Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.
22 Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord.
23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior.
24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.
25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her
God bless you both,
Bill Greguska

NeedEncouragement.com

—–Original Message—–

Subject: My marriage
Message Body:
My husband and I have hurt each other a lot. We got married young and have really struggled on our own. We came into this marriage strong with God and we’re both wanting to get back on that path. Tired of talking to people that don’t look from a Christian view. We don’t have any children and want some one day if possible. We need to get over this hurt before we can make that happen. It’s been a struggle in the beginning mainly bc my husband has childhood PTSD. He doesn’t react like the “normal” person to small things. It causes us to be at each other’s throat and it feels like we’re just killing ourselves. I don’t want to leave my husband nor separate. I just know there are a lot of feelings we haven’t felt or processed because like has gotten so crazy. If you could help us, that would be amazing. Thank you for reading.

Thank you Bill, I will look through it.
Hi Prerna,
I can give you some information, but you might have to Google for more information if what I share is not what you would want.
You can try to call 800-633-3446 but keep in mind that they are understaffed, so you might need to be patient or call back at another time.

* A Disclaimer ~ The Need Him Ministry Are Not Licensed Counselors, But They Are Very Helpful.

  1. Free Christian Counseling 

  2. Free Christian Groundwire Chat (Not Licensed Counselors)

  3. Free Christian Chat About Jesus (Not Licensed Counselors)

  4. Free One Time Professional Christian Counseling. (They Are Licensed Counselors)

I hope what I have shared will be of help to you.
Bill Greguska

NeedEncouragement.com

—–Original Message—–
Subject: Re: NeedEncouragement.com “Christian counseling”

Could you please guide me to a Christian resource which would accommodate a call? 

 

On Tue, Sep 13, 2022, 1:33 AM NeedEncouragement.com / Bill <billgreguska@aol.com> wrote:

Hi Prerna,

It is nice that you reached out to talk yet our free Christian counseling is only via email. If you have a question for me, I would be more than happy to respond to your inquiry.
Bill Greguska
Subject: Christian counseling
Message Body:
I live in Delhi and would desire to speak to a Christian counselor.

Hi Bob,
I am not familiar with ERP therapy, but I am curious because I was informed that sexual sin is the only type of sin that needs to be run away from.  I looked up the story of Joseph and Potiphar”s wife and have some insights for you. I would encourage you to keep praying and trust that God can help you.
I firmly believe that trying to make friends or accepting sinful sexual thoughts is not the answer, you need to avoid those thoughts, but if, and when they come, you need to FLEE FROM THEM!!!
Also, having an accountability partner can be a big help to you! https://needencouragement.com/accountability-partner/
I hope what I have shared will be helpful to you.
God bless you, and keep up the good fight!
Bill Greguska

NeedEncouragement.com

What can we learn from the account of Potiphar’s wife?

https://www.gotquestions.org/Potiphars-wife.html

Answer

The story of Joseph and Potiphar’s wife in Genesis 39 contains some obvious lessons about fidelity in the face of sexual temptation, and there are also some subtler points to be found about the loyal character of God. The story is dramatic: Jacob’s son Joseph is in Egypt, where he is Potiphar’s servant and the most trusted overseer in his household. Potiphar’s wife sees that Joseph “was well-built and handsome, and after a while . . . said, ‘Come to bed with me!’” (Genesis 39:6–7).

Potiphar’s wife tries to seduce Joseph, but he staunchly refuses her advances: “My master has withheld nothing from me except you, because you are his wife. How then could I do such a wicked thing and sin against God?” (Genesis 39:9). Joseph is loyal both to Potiphar and to God. Potiphar’s wife doesn’t give up; she “spoke to Joseph day after day, [but] he refused to go to bed with her or even be with her” (verse 10). Note the wise course Joseph takes, choosing not to be alone with Potiphar’s wife if he could help it.

But then came a turning point in Joseph’s life: “One day he went into the house to attend to his duties, and none of the household servants was inside. [Potiphar’s wife] caught him by his cloak and said, ‘Come to bed with me!’ But he left his cloak in her hand and ran out of the house” (Genesis 39:11–12). Potiphar’s wife, spurned again, stands there with Joseph’s cloak in her hand, and she chooses an angry, vindictive plan: “She called her household servants. ‘Look,’ she said to them, ‘this Hebrew . . . came in here to sleep with me, but I screamed. When he heard me scream for help, he left his cloak beside me and ran out of the house’” (verses 14–15).

When Potiphar came home, his wife showed him Joseph’s cloak and repeated the lie: “As soon as I screamed for help, he left his cloak beside me and ran out of the house. . . . This is how your slave treated me” (Genesis 39:18–19). Potiphar, outraged at Joseph’s supposed betrayal, put him in prison (verse 20).

There is much in the story of Potiphar’s wife about resisting sexual temptation. A brash woman overtly tempts a man, pulling on his clothes and saying, “Lie with me.” The man flees from her so suddenly that he actually leaves his garment in her hand. Joseph doesn’t stand there, gazing at the woman, considering whether or not he should sleep with her. He immediately gets out of there (see 1 Corinthians 6:18).

Joseph’s wise handling of the situation with Potiphar’s wife directly contrasts the foolhardy actions of the simple man in Proverbs. Solomon sees a fool walking toward the house of an adulterous woman (Proverbs 7:8). When the fool drew near, “she took hold of him and kissed him . . . with a brazen face” (verse 13). Rather than run away like Joseph, the foolish man stayed to listen to her: “With persuasive words she led him astray; she seduced him with her smooth talk” (verse 21). And he paid a high price for his foolishness: “All at once he followed her like an ox going to the slaughter” (verse 22). One could argue the Joseph, too, paid a high price—his virtue landed him in prison—but one has only to read the rest of Genesis to see the blessings God had in store for Joseph.

It is interesting to note that Genesis 39 does not say anything about Joseph’s feelings for Potiphar’s wife: was he attracted to her? Did he find her beautiful or interesting? How long did they have a perfectly normal and friendly relationship—servant and mistress—before she chose to attempt a seduction? None of this is enumerated. The heart of the issue is this: Potiphar’s wife promised happiness and sensual satisfaction, but Joseph saw sin for what it is, refusing to do “this great wickedness” (Genesis 39:9, ESV). Joseph feared God, knowing that all sin is ultimately against Him (see Psalm 51:4). In saying “no” to Potiphar’s wife, Joseph showed himself to be wise: “The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom; all who follow his precepts have good understanding” (Psalm 111:10).

The incident with Potiphar’s wife is bookended by two passages that speak of God’s love and blessing to Joseph. Joseph found favor in the eyes of the Egyptians among whom he lived and rose to a position of prominence in the house of Potiphar (Genesis 39:1–6). Joseph’s success and position was the direct result of God’s blessing (verses 2–3). When Joseph was wrongly accused and sent to prison, God remained faithful. God “showed [Joseph] kindness and granted him favor in the eyes of the prison warden” (verse 21). Soon, the keeper of the prison had put Joseph in charge of the other prisoners and trusted him so fully that he no longer paid attention to anything that was under Joseph’s control (verses 22–23). Everything Joseph did succeeded because “the Lord was with Joseph” (verse 23).

The story of Potiphar’s wife is about loyalty as much as it is about resisting temptation. Potiphar’s wife was disloyal to her husband, but Joseph was loyal both to Potiphar and to God. God shows us amazing loyalty and faithfulness. It is part of His character. He is “compassionate and gracious . . . slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness” (Exodus 34:6). “For the word of the LORD is right and true; he is faithful in all he does” (Psalm 33:4). Joseph’s desire to be faithful and loyal to Potiphar was in response to God’s faithfulness to Him; Joseph was reflecting God’s character, which is what the godly do. “Whoever claims to live in him must live as Jesus did” (1 John 2:6).

When Potiphar’s wife stirred her husband’s jealousy and made him throw Joseph in prison unjustly, God was still there, comforting and blessing Joseph. From this we can learn that, even if we are treated unfairly in this life, God will never forsake His servants (Hebrews 13:5).

—–Original Message—–

Subject: OCD and sinful impure thoughts
Message Body:
I struggle with OCD which in many cases involves impure
thoughts that seem impossible to keep from thinking about and have suffered with this since my mid 30’s ,
Some of the treatment therapy is ERP or the definition is Exposure Response Therapy, which says you learn to accept thoughts that come to mind instead of trying to run away or not think about them because the more you worry about them
the more they repeat and become repetitive and obsessive or fixating,
I tend to fight this primarily because of my catholic background, but also have been working to accept and let these thoughts go, and this is the reason I am writing.
My struggle at 68 years old and having struggled since my
30’s and praying daily, I still feel very sinful that these thoughts seem to be more prevalent, as I have got older,
I have never discussed this with my family, because I have heard from so many in our community that deal with this that many of their families do not understand and think it is not a big deal, which of course it is a very big deal for those who are in this struggle,
The biggest problem I continue to have in my mind is how sinful I feel every time I have an inappropriate thought, and just wanted to see if I might get another perspective.

Hi Laudi,

What have you done so far to help heal the marriage?
What are you willing to do to keep the marriage alive?
Why are you even considering a divorce?
I strongly encourage you to do what you can to keep your marriage alive, thinking that a divorce will solve all your problems is not true, it just creates a whole new set of problems! I was divorced back in 2007 and yes my marriage was difficult like yours sounds like it is. But looking back it would have been easier to just work on the marriage I had which was I wanted to do.
I encourage you to pray about it although in prayer the Lord hates divorce so I think your best bet is to find a marriage counselor that you both can go to and talk with and then work things out slowly and prayerfully!
God bless you and your husband,
Bill Greguska 

Needencouragement.com

Subject: Anxiety and marriage conflict
Message Body:
Good morning, I am in the process of debating if I should have a divorce.

Hi Ashli,
You are right that pornography is not something you want in your life for your boyfriend to be watching. If I were your dad, I would sit your boyfriend down and give him a choice if he cannot refrain from his pornography addiction, then you will have to leave him. I would give him one last chance (that is if you really love him and it is not just a physical attraction). Why do you love him in the first place? If he is not cooperative, then saying goodbye is the wisest thing you can do. It will hurt and might be a little ugly, but best in the long run, it would be the be. Please pray about this. Don’t just do it because I suggested it, think it out and pray to God and ask Him yourself. You might prepare to have a support system to encourage you because a breakup can be a very emotional thing.
I hope you make the right decision that will make a big difference in your life. As you said, you deserve better!
God bless you,
Bill Greguska

NeedEncouragement.com

—–Original Message—–

Subject: Boyfriend/relationship
Message Body:
Hello. My boyfriend watches porn even though he knows how I feel about. He knows I think it is cheating and sinful and how bad it hurts me. He says he doesn’t have a problem because he went a month and a half without looking at it until this last time which was yesterday. I told him that it breaks my trust and that I deserve better than that. He said that the mistrust lies within ME and it’s MY fault I don’t trust him, not his fault. Actually, you know, it’s HIS fault and HIS actions that caused the mistrust. I don’t accept that him saying it’s MY fault I don’t trust him. He said he could go forever without doing it, but it’s a repeated cycle. He said he doesn’t know how he’ll fix our relationship and broken trust. I understand that us living together is a sin and he knows that too. In a way, he uses that to justify his actions saying that “sin is sin.” I feel hurt and lost and I don’t know what to do. I am currently a junior in college and my degree will be in Psychology: Addictions and Recovery. I am honestly great with helping others, but not with helping myself in these situations. I’ve been a Christian my whole life and he’s only been one for a few years. I love him, want to be with him forever, and I want to marry him, but this cycle needs to stop and I don’t know what else to do. Please help. Thank you.

Hi Jack,
You seem to be a very wise man, and your comment seems to have two answers to solve your problem, Either get your thoughts right with the woman or avoid contact with her. Writing in for help indicates that you are minimizing your feelings towards her.
My best advice is to pray about this situation and then talk to your pastor about it and see what he suggests. He is the Shepard of his church and will have an answer for you. Of course, talk in private. Sharing this with him will bring it to the light where it needs to be. You are flirting with trouble, and I am sure you know that.
You should thank God that you have a sensitive conscience about this subject. May God bless you for your honesty and willingness to do what is right.
Bill Greguska

NeedEncouragement.com

—–Original Message—–

Subject: Troubles in my church life
Message Body:
I am a single man never been married. I am a faithful church goer. I find myself attracted to a married woman who comes to church with her husband. Its not a sexual or lustful feeling, I just find myself enthralled with her beauty and personality. This troubles me because I am friends with her husband. Neither of them has any idea of my feelings, and I certainly would never do anything to make them know

Hi Daniela,
Being 22 years old, you are very wise and seem to have a heart for the Lord. https://needencouragement.com/how-to-pray/
I am sorry that you are in the situation that you are in. There is hope because God is a God of Hope and second chances.
You have the right idea about not living together until you get married.
Can he move back in with his parents?
What does your pastor say about your situation? Any suggestions?
There must be a solution that can please God, your boyfriend, and yourself simultaneously. You will need to ask God through prayer what He wants you to do.
I pray that God will answer your plea for help, do not give up hope, but keep God first, and you will be thankful that you did.
Matthew 6:33 But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.
Bill Greguska

NeedEncouragement.com

—–Original Message—–

Subject: I need guidance
Message Body:
Hello, I’m 22 and currently living with my boyfriend.
My parents were uninvolved in giving me a place to live after I turned 19. They are separated and have issues. So I had to live alone, after I was low on money I had to live somewhere else. Where the environment was bad my roommates all did drugs. When I met my boyfriend we decided it was healthiest for me to live with him. I’m waking up panicked knowing that God does not intend for us to live together before marriage. We started a business together in a new state,  I just started having more success in my career and He offered to leave his Job to help me and grow in success with me. I couldn’t run it alone. Now He is living off of my finances  and refuses to move out because “I set him up poorly” I’ve expressed to him that he needs to move out or we need to get married and he is denying me both options. He wants me to have a nice wedding but I don’t care about that anymore I just want to obey God. What do I do.. I can’t live knowing that I’m actively disobeying God. I also love him a lot.

Hi Elizabeth,
I do not know how to interpret dreams. I would encourage you to talk to your counselor for help if this is a major hurdle for you. If he or she can not help you, ask for a referral for a new counselor.
Here are a few things to consider for better healthy sleep.
  1. Do you eat before bed? (do not)
  2. Do you pray before you go to bed? (do)
  3. Do you spend time on the computer before bed? (1/2 hour off before bed)
  4. Do you drink alcohol before bed? (be aware)
  5. Is your room completely dark? (dark and quiet is good)
  6. Do you watch the news before bed, there is a lot to be anxious about in the news. I would stop it if you are a news watcher. (news is bad)
I hope what I have shared has been of help to you.
God bless you and keep your mind on God, not your fears.
Bill Greguska

NeedEncouragement.com

—–Original Message—–

Subject: Dreams and anxiety
Message Body:
I have generalized anxiety. I also have dreams off and on for the past 10 years approximately and they are always dreams about a male figure or figures in my bedroom close to my bed. They never are coming after me but I always lash out at them and have even gotten out of my bed to try to wrestle with them to figure out why they’re there and get them to leave, which by the time I wake up they are gone, of course. Just wondering if you may have some insight on this problem. Also, my anxious thoughts during the day are troublesome to me – can’t seem to shake it off very well. I do all the things in the natural to try to not be anxious but I still find myself worried and fearful a lot these days. I am a Christian and love God with all my heart and I know there is a reason for all of this and it will come out for the good hopefully! Thank you for any prayers for me at this time or any suggestions. I am seeing a therapist every 2 weeks but still having the problems.

Hi Jaye,
I am sorry, I do not know how to organize a grief share group, but you can contact Grief Share directly, and I am sure they would be happy to help you get a group started.
The link below will give you the information you need to start a group.
God bless you!
Bill Greguska

NeedEncouragement.com

—–Original Message—–

Subject: Fw: NeedEncouragement.com “Grief Share group”

 

—– Forwarded Message —–
Message Body:
Hi, I am a hospice chaplain and a church pastor’s wife. I would like to organize a grief share group. Please advise how to start a support group

Hi Jennifer,
To try to answer your question the best way I can, is to mention that when my wife moved out in 2005, and I prayed that God could restore our marriage, God did not restore our marriage. That does not mean that God couldn’t do it, but God allowed my prayers to be answered in a way that I did not hope for. Sometimes God answers prayer right away, and other times he tells us to wait on Him and to do His will. Sometimes He doesn’t answer our prayers right away, because He has a better plan in store that we can not fanthom. His thoughts are higher than ours rememeber.
Is there possibly any unconfessed sin that is in your life, if so, confess it to God, He is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.
Is what you are praying for in God’s will or just your will?
I hope what I have shared has been of some help to you.
God bless you,
Bill Greguska

NeedEncouragement.com

—–Original Message—–
Subject: Re: NeedEncouragement.com “Ask for a prophet or pastor who hears from God often”

Well just 2 ask God why he not answering me and wat is going on
Hi Alisha,
I have to be honest with you, I am neither a prophet nor a pastor, but I pray and hear from God regularly if you wish to share what is on your mind.
I have been a Christian since 1986. So if you wish to share, I am open to hearing and giving you my feedback.
I pray that whatever is weighing heavy on your heart, you hand it over to the Lord in prayer.
1 Peter 5:7  Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.
God bless you!
Bill Greguska

NeedEncouragement.com

—–Original Message—–

Subject: Ask for a prophet  or pastor who hears from God often
Message Body:
Hi I need someone who hears from God often to pray for me to him and ask what is going on specifically in my life and what is happening and what are his thoughts about and what are his plans about and what he has to say to me

Hi Oretunde,
I am glad to hear that what I have shared has been a help to you. Praise God for that!
Try to focus on consistent small steps back towards your wife. There will still be some ups and downs, but be firm and trust that the Lord will be with you guarding your words and action.
I encourage you to buy her flowers and write her a lovely card. It sounds like the Lord is giving you a second chance. I pray that you use it wisely and prayerfully!
God bless you and your wife!
Bill Greguska

NeedEncouragement.com

—–Original Message—–
Subject: Re: NeedEncouragement.com “Marriage challenges(2) Direction in life”

Thank you very much Mr. Bill. I will definitely take some more positive steps as suggested. For starters I am currently out of the family house and will return in a day or two. (My wife is aware of the short trip) this is aimed at just allowing some fresh air around both of us and for me to reflect deeper about some of the things highlighted above.

God bless you really good.
Yours
Oretade Babatunde 

 

Hi Oretade,
I give you credit that you took this step for help. You are wise to know that your marriage situation is bigger than yourself. I strongly encourage you to talk to your pastor with your wife in the room together, if you would rather see a counselor, that would be good too. But you need to be proactive and initiate something. On your own, you most likely will spin your wheels and possibly make things even worse. Make a promise to yourself and me, that you will not get into a shouting match again, whether in front of your kids or alone.
Ephesians 5:25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her
Please check out this link and watch the 1st video because I think it can be of help to you.
It is good that you have been praying, keep praying each morning and through out the day. Since you are the leader of your home, you need to ask God to give you the authority back and ask God to give up your wife’s control she has stolen. Be wise in dealing with her, for she will most likely use your own words against you. What ever you are doing now that is not working, please STOP DOING IT! And start to show you wife love that she need to experience. What ever that might look like, I am sure it will not come easy to you, but if you want things better in your home, you are going to need to do some things different.
  1. Start with a new attitude towards your wife.
  2. Do not yell or threaten her in any way.
  3. Allow her to talk and get her feeling out to you.
  4. Listen closely to what she says and try to do it.
  5. Watch your tone of voice and the looks you give her.
  6. Keep praying to God.
Bill Greguska

NeedEncouragement.com

—–Original Message—–

Subject: Marriage challenges(2) Direction in life
Message Body:
I’m 49 years and still can’t place my hands on the direction my life should go. I just seem to struggle aimlessly hopping from one type of job to another looking for fulfillment and happiness.
(2) I have been married for 15 years but not happy with my wife. She is not as educated as me and always bull headedly stubborn. I sense she too is not happy. The only thing that seems to keep us still going together are our children as we don’t want them to suffer effects of a broken marriage. I don’t feel my wife’s friendship and love and feel we are more of competitors. She changes and challenges my decisions in the house without recourse to me. This has led to several shouting matches in the house in the presence of the kids..an action I do not like. I have had course to plead with my wife to please give peace a chance and if there was anything I have done she wasn’t pleased with she should please forgive me but this didn’t work either. I am seriously in search of happiness, joy and fulfilment. I have prayed about this issues and still praying but not seeing changes.
I need help…
Yours
Tunde

Hi Caden,

My name is Bill Greguska, I’m a born again Christian since 1986. I may not have all the answers to your questions, but I know the one who does which is Jesus Christ and his word.
I am not a licensed counselor or therapist but if you would like to share your burden with me I’m more than honored to point you to Jesus.
Simply share what is your biggest burden and I will get back to you via email only. We do not do phone counseling.
I would encourage you to pray about whatever you’re going through and get hooked up with your local Bible believing Church. Talking to a pastor and having fellowship with other believers is priceless.
I look forward to hearing back from you.
God bless you!
Bill Greguska

Needencouragement.com

Subject: Christian counselling
Message Body:
Hi there
I’m just looking for a Christian therapist / counselor.
Basically someone of faith to talk to

Hi Abi,
We do our counseling via email only. Let me know your biggest struggle, and I will point you to Jesus Christ and His word.
Have you been praying about your situation at all lately?  https://needencouragement.com/how-to-pray/
Please feel free to email me back if you’d like me to encourage you. Usually, the emails go back and for a couple of times generally.
God bless you,
Bill Greguska

NeedEncouragement.com

—–Original Message—–

Subject: Christian Counselling
Message Body:
Hello I hope you’re well. I stumbled across your website and saw that you offer free Christian counselling. I’m looking round at the moment for some counselling/therapy and feel like Christian counselling would be really helpful as I am Christian. I’m wondering how this would work? Is it face to face, or over call or video call? I’m from England

Hi Guerline,
I have two kids of my own, and I have found in the past that when I was firm, fair, and fun with them, things seemed to always work out for the best.
Have you been praying about your situation with your daughter? https://needencouragement.com/how-to-pray/
Your daughter is almost grown, yet she is still living under your roof, you are the parent and she needs to come under your submission. If she chooses to rebel and laugh at you or things in general, I would sit her down and explain how serious this is to you for her to listen and cooperate, and try to find the root of her problem, it could be anything from her using drugs, alcohol, boyfriend problem, peer pressure, emotional stress, insecurity, ore simply teenage rebellion.
 It would be worth your time and energy if you need to talk for an hour or more. If talking to her does not work. Then I would give her a warning, and then begin to take away privileges such as the cell phone, computer, TV, and going out at night. Plus adding extra chores on her plate. I would suggest starting on small consequences and building up from there if she still is in a rebellious attitude.
You are the one who needs to talk with her, if she would be willing to email me, I could try to talk with her, but most likely she would not be willing to do that in my opinion. So as I said, it is up to you. You can do it, ask God to give you the wisdom you need and the strength to speak to her.
Here is a page from my website that can help you.
God bless you, and do not give up!
Bill Greguska

NeedEncouragement.com

—–Original Message—–

Subject: I need help with my daughter
Message Body:
I really need help with my daughter she is 17 going be 18 in October and she being disobedient and she think everything is a joke so I really need someone to talk to her.