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Subject: Cost

Message Body:

Hello,

What is the price per session after the free one? Many blessings, Joann
Hi JoAnn, I can tell you that the first counseling is free, but you need to ask them after that. https://www.focusonthefamily.com/get-help/counseling-services-and-referrals/

Subject: Husband problems

Message Body:
Hi, I’m a 68-year-old Christian married woman in a toxic marriage.  We’ve been married almost ten years, and my husband is very verbally abusive to me (getting extremely angry over the tiniest mistake or “oopsie,” yelling, screaming, and cursing at me).  I have even left him several times and stayed with a friend for a few days.  He adamantly refuses to go to counseling with me and recently told me that he does not believe ANY counselor can help him because he has a demon.  I am not in a position to leave him permanently or divorce him, as I need his financial support.  He is 12 years younger than me and still employed.My only income is a small Social Security check. I have even fasted and prayed about this and have shed “rivers” of tears.  Things get better for a while, and then when I least expect it, his rage and anger volcano erupts again.  Please tell me what I can do before I go insane!  I cannot afford to go to counseling by myself, and even if finances were not a problem, I do not want to risk contracting COVID.  Is there some way you can help me?  Please let me know ASAP. Joanie
Hi Joanie,I am glad that you have reached out. It sounds like a heavy burden you are carrying, yet there still is hope. My first suggestion is to pray and pray strategically each time you have a meal. Ask God for His wisdom and protection from the anger of your husband. James 1:5 If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you. Have you been praying for your husband too?
There must be something that is making him so upset. Hopefully, it is a temporary situation, and it will pass over, but maybe it is here to stay for a while. In any case, all relationships need healthy boundaries, or else in your case. You may become sick because of not having limits. https://needencouragement.com/toxic-relationships/
You might want to change the approach you have been using with him. A saying goes,“Insanity is expecting different results with the same behavior. “Maybe for a while (a week or two or so), when he explodes at you, do not react to his foolishness but rather allow him to see the calm in you, which might defuse his anger and bring him to his senses.

I pray that God gives you the strength you need, the wisdom you need, and the patience and love you need to keep the two of you together and find a better sense of happiness and joy together. Life is too short to be fussing and fighting.

Hi Joanie,
I was glad to share my hope and strength with you. My wife and I had a challenging marriage, and because of it was birthed the website NeedEncouragement.com since my pastor Ron and his wife Sue Sauer counseled my ex and me for about a year, and when my wife gave up and moved out of our house for two years, then finally divorced me. It was devastating to me. I got very depressed and crashed and burned. Sue Sauer’s idea was for me to focus on encouraging others to get out of my depression. I listened to her and started this website in 2007, and it has been of great help not only to others but also to me. You might want to consider trying to encourage someone you know who needs some help too.
I built wheelchair ramps for ten years, and during that time, I learned and relearned that if you take a screw out of the wood and try to use the same hole to catch a piece of wood better, it does not work. Like I am trying to tell you, you need to change your approach; otherwise, you will get the same negative results. (I hope that makes sense to you)
One more thought, I encourage you to put your energy into pleasing the Lord, and in doing so, your husband will benefit, and ultimately you will benefit. Here are a couple of things to keep in mind:

1. Pray each morning and throughout the day, especially when tested or tempted to get frustrated.
2. Read your Bible for at least 10-15 minutes a day.
3. Try not to react to your husband’s negativity.
4. Do not put a lot of thought and energy into knowing more about Satan. Put your energy into understanding God’s will better!
5. Remember, for every step forward. It is one step away from how things used to be and one step closer to where you want them to be.
6. Maybe both you and your husband could get a check-up from your doctor. There might be some physical issues going on with either one of you.
7. Try to have gentle answers for him.
8. Buy your husband a card or small gift as a pleasant surprise.
9. Take care of your health – eat healthy, sleep 7-8 hours a night, exercise daily, even walking is excellent.
10. Don’t forget to laugh.
11. Make it a point to encourage someone, and do that regularly. (your husband counts)
12. Get back into your church and study.
13. Be prepared that your husband will lose his temper, but don’t let that shake you, and keep praying for him.
14. Encourage your husband in any way you can. When he is encouraged, you will be inspired too!

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Hi Dominic,
I am glad you have reached out to us, although I am sad to hear that you are struggling in your prayer life, and you say that you feel like you have lost your salvation. It sounds like you have already been saved by putting your faith and trust in God, but you are struggling with a habitual sin that you need to get rid of, not on your own, but through the power of God.
https://needencouragement.com/habitual-sin/

1. Have you asked God for His help in your situation?
2. Do you have anyone in you can go to for accountability in your life

It sounds like you are struggling with spiritual warfare, which means you are getting beaten up by Satan and allowing it to happen. You can not beat Satan in your flesh, but with God’s help, you can. Here are a couple of scriptures that might be of service to you.

An old Cherokee Indian chief was teaching his grandson about life.

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Subject: messed up sleeping pattern & problems with basic functioning because of sleep problem. Message Body:
Need I needed & prayer to help me get back on track with my sleep. Betty Ann

Hi Betty Ann,
I am glad you decided to reach out for help. I am not a medical person, but I know some things about messed-up sleep patterns from personal experience.
My doctor instructed me and a couple of other people I often go to for advice.

1. Pray and ask God to give you peace and peaceful sleep.
2. Avoid anything with caffeine, such as coffee or soda. Even chocolate has caffeine in it and should be avoided.
3. Make sure you get some exercise each day; even walking can be good.
4. Drink decaffeinated tea before bed. There is a special bedtime tea you should consider.
5. I have gotten into a great habit that seems to work for me. When I lay down to sleep, I take five deep breaths holding each for 7 seconds, and let out slowly for 7 seconds with my lips slightly together to allow the air to exhale slowly.
6. Another thought is to deal with anything you are worried about, anyone you are withholding forgiveness from, or anyone you need to resolve any problems with.

Consider trying some or all of these suggestions, and keep praying for your sleep to return to you!If what I suggested has been helpful, please email me back if you have any questions or need to share anything else.
I trust and pray that you get your sleep back real soon.

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1. Do you pray for or pray with your wife?
2. As the leader, have you attempted to sit down and talk with your wife about making things better?
3. When your wife talks to you, do you listen to her?
4. Do you often keep your word to your wife or change plans?
5. Do you go to church with your wife?
6. Do you go on date nights with your wife at least once a week?
7. Do you tell your wife you love her and show her how you behave?
8. Do you approach her in romantic ways still?
9. Does pornography tempt you?
10. Do you have an alcohol or drug problem?
11. Do you raise your voice to your wife?
12. Do you spend enough time with your wife, or does she complain?
13. What have you done to make your marriage better as of today?
14. Do you believe that divorce is not an option?
15. Are you willing to do what it takes to get your marriage back on track?

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In the meantime, continue to love her, point her to the Lord, and be available to her if she wants to talk about her sins and temptations.

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Hi Chelsi,I am glad you reached out for some advice. My best advice is to keep praying about your situation and get into God’s Word to give you the direction you need. I can offer you some advice, although it would be hard to advise you. But I can tell you that you are doing what the scriptures teach us. You are examining your life, which is good and healthy. Right now, the world is fighting Coronavirus, which does not make things any easier.

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Subject: Marriage advice Message Body:
I can’t believe I am doing this online, but I am still confused after much prayer.  My husband of 21 years is not a Christian.  We struggle to keep a loving relationship, trying to “force” it.  I have fallen in love with another Christian man with that; I have a fantastic connection. Although I have not met him in person, I can’t stop dreaming of a future with him and feel that God has brought our lives together for a purpose. 
Is seeking divorce a complete sin in my case? My husband is not abusive. The worst I can accuse him of is being sarcastic and pessimistic. He forgave me for infidelity in the past.  But maybe the loving thing would be to let him go.  I know the Bible says God hates divorce.  I’m very torn up and confused.  I would rather be alone and take my chances with the man I met, even if it doesn’t work out when I meet him in person.  Arghh. Amy
Hi Amy,
I am glad you reached out for advice. I will be praying for you and your husband. I know that you are not the only one struggling in marriage. Look at what you, yourself, just told me in your short email:

1. You are right that God hates divorce.
2. Your husband is not abusive. The worst you can accuse him of is being sarcastic and pessimistic.
3. He forgave you for infidelity in the past.
4. You have been married for 21 years.

Here are a few pages that I am sure will be of help to you
https://needencouragement.com/improve-your-marriage/https://needencouragement.com/better-marriage/https://needencouragement.com/fix-marriage-problems/

If you did not already, the first thing you need to do is tell the guy you are online with that you are married. You identify as a Christian, yet if you love the Lord and follow Him, it would be straightforward to solve your confusion that stems from allowing your emotions to get the best of you.
Here is what I would suggest that you do right away.

1. Ask God to forgive you for wandering where you should not have been with the guys on the internet. 1 John 1:9-10 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. If we claim we have not sinned, we make him out to be a liar, and his word is not in us.
2. Pray and read your Bible each morning.
3. Talk to your husband about getting marital counseling. Proverbs 1:7 The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge; fools despise wisdom and instruction.
4. Promise yourself that you will send one last communication to the man on the internet, explaining how cheating on your husband is wrong and that God is convicting you of it. And as of now, you are not going to communicate with him after that email. Psalm 51:17 My sacrifice, O God, is a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart you, God, will not despise.
5. How can you honestly say you are working on your marriage when emailing another guy? Put that energy into your husband, and I am sure he will come around.
6. For starters, tell your husband what you need from him specifically; say it so as not to complain or belittle him; just let him know your needs. If he is such a wonderful man you say he is, he will come through to some degree, and things will start to improve. You have to start somewhere!
7. You say you have been praying, and at the same time, you are cheating on your husband. God will not hear your prayers until you confess and repent of the sin you are in right now with the internet guy. You are confused because you are not walking with the Lord.  James 5:16 Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective.

Romans 7:1-3 Do you not know, brothers and sisters—for I am speaking to those who know the law—that the law has authority over someone only as long as that person lives? For example, by law, a married woman is bound to her husband as long as he is alive, but if her husband dies, she is released from the law that binds her to him. So then, if she has sexual relations with another man while her husband is still alive, she is called an adulteress. But if her husband dies, she is released from that law and is not an adulteress if she marries another man.Matthew 5:27-28 “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman [man] lustfully has already committed adultery with her [him] in his [her] heart.

I am sorry that I felt that I had to speak to you so strongly. I see a dear sister in Christ lost in her sin and needs to be rebuked and woken up. You are not a bad person, but the devil has tricked you, and you need to get out of that online relationship. I have warned you, and now it is up to you what you will do. Being torn up and confused is the Holy Spirit trying to guide you. At the same time, the devil is doing what he does best and is lying to you, stealing your joy, and attempting to kill your marriage.

James 1:5 If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.
If what I have shared with you has been of any help, please email me back if you need to talk more about this or have any questions. I pray for your marriage and your part to keep it alive. God knows what you need. I am just trying to point you in the right direction since you have strayed away.
May God give you wisdom and strength to do what is right!

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Subject: Bringing problems into a relationship
Message Body:
Hello,
I am a Christian (19, Male), and I am considering dating another Christian girl. I want God to be the center of our relationship and our focus to be a ministry. However, I have a lot of ongoing sins that I haven’t dealt with. I feel underprepared emotionally and spiritually to invest myself in a partner most of the time. Whether or not I should pursue a relationship with unresolved sin in my life or wait until I am right with God. Thank you for your time.

Hi Ruben, That is great that you want to date a Christian girl and do things right! But remember first things first. Matthew 6:33 But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Since you mentioned that you feel underprepared emotionally and spiritually to invest yourself in a partner, I think you have answered your question. But in the meantime, starting up a friendship with a girl just as friends until you are more ready might be something to consider. First, before you go any further, you need to confess all your sins to God.1 John 1:9  If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us and purify us from all unrighteousness. Did you already ask God for what you ought to do? https://needencouragement.com/how-to-pray/ It is okay to ask someone like me, but the real place to go is to the source, which is God himself!https://needencouragement.com/get-right-with-god/When the time comes, and you are ready for a dating relationship, Ruben, check out this page. https://needencouragement.com/dating-advice/If what I have shared has been helpful to you, please feel free to email me back if you have more you wish to say or have any other questions.

NeedEncouragement.com

You mentioned that you went to church with your family, but have you been born again at some point in your life yet?

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Subject: Hardships

1 John 1:9 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.

1. Ask God in prayer to help you get back on the right path.
2. Thank God for all your blessings.
3. Make sure you eat healthy and drink plenty of water.
4. Be sure to get regular exercise.
5. Try to get 7-8 hours of sleep each night.
6. Forgive your ex-roommate and anyone else you have bad feelings toward.
7. Do not allow negative thoughts from the devil to get into your head.
8. Make sure you keep social with your friends (with social distancing, of course).
9. Be sure you laugh because laughter is good for us all.
10. Try to avoid alcohol and drugs. They will only make things worse.
11. Be good to yourself; learn to be best friends.
12. Try to reach out to help someone else. Helping others can be a great way to help others and yourself too.

1. As far as helping NeedEncouragement.com, it would not be a paid position, but we could use your prayers for those who email us with emotional, mental, physical, and spiritual needs. Please pray that God works through our ministry, and as a result, people will come to the saving knowledge of Jesus Christ.
2. You could get on our mailing, be encouraged by the emails I send out weekly, and forward them to others on your mailing list.

1. Have I hurt your feelings recently, and you never mentioned it to me?
2. Why haven’t you texted me for four days?
3. Can’t you tell that we have drifted apart somewhat?
4. How do you feel our relationship is going?
5. How much do you love me?

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If you desire to find a church to help you with your insecurities, here is a link that can help you find a good Bible-believing church.

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Hi Mark,
Jesus spoke of a special type of blasphemy—blasphemy against the Holy Spirit—committed by the religious leaders of His day. The situation was that the Pharisees were eyewitnesses to Jesus’ miracles, but they attributed the work of the Holy Spirit to the presence of a demon (Mark 3:22-30). Their portrayal of the holy as demonic was a deliberate, insulting rejection of God and was unforgivable.
Fortunately, Jesus forgives even the sin of blasphemy. Paul was a blasphemer (1 Timothy 1:13) and tried to make others blaspheme (Acts 26:11). Jesus’ brothers thought He was insane (Mark 3:21). All repented, and all were forgiven.

Blasphemy, by definition, is both deliberate and direct. That being the case, a believer in Jesus Christ will not/cannot commit blasphemy. Even so, we should be careful to reflect God’s holiness and never misrepresent the glory, authority, and character of God.
Mark, here is a link that explains what blasphemy is in more detail. https://www.gotquestions.org/blasphemy-blaspheme.html

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Hi Jeffrey,
I’m very sorry to hear that your dentist made a mess with your teeth, I don’t understand when you say you don’t know how much longer you’re going to live if it’s that bad you need to go to an emergency room and get some help there. I’m sorry I don’t understand what you’re saying it doesn’t make a lot of sense but I will pray that God will watch over you during this time. Have you considered praying about your situation? Common Sense tells me to be very careful when you eat and make sure you don’t bite on the tender areas. You may also consider taking Tylenol for pain, take it according to what it says on the bottle. I’m very sorry that you’re going through this pain, I still think that the dentist is responsible for what he did to you, don’t you agree?1 Peter 5:7 cast all her anxiety on him because he cares for you! Proverbs 3:5-6 trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding but all your ways acknowledge Him and you shall make your path straight.

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Hi John,
You have a very important question you ask. I would answer it by saying that since you want to increase your faith, you have faith in the first place. Right? Here are some excellent suggestions to help you increase your faith and grow closer to God.

1. Build upon what you already believe to be true
2. Read your Bible and use a concordance to find specifically what you want to learn more about.
3. Start by reading your Bible for about 5 minutes each morning, and pray for a couple of minutes. (in time, you will naturally want to spend more time, but start slowly and consistently)
4. Pray to God to increase your faith and keep your eyes open to the many wonders that God provides in His created nature. https://needencouragement.com/how-to-pray/
5. Get involved with your church and share fellowship with others. If you do not have a church check out… https://needencouragement.com/find-a-good-church/

John, if what I have shared has been of help, please feel free to email me back if you need any clarification or have any other questions.I pray that God opens your eyes as He did for me, and your faith will increase as you requested. Be patient and also faithful in your pursuit of knowing God better. https://needencouragement.com/follow-jesus-christ/God bless you,

—–Original Message—–

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I will pray that you humbly take your concerns to God and read your Bible each morning, and pray and get involved in your church or find a church.

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1 Peter 5:7 Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.

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Here is one of many good scriptures that will help you.

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1. Pray each morning when you wake up and pray throughout the day.
2. Get rid of your vap equipment, throw it away if you have to.
3. Avoid anyone who still is vaping.
4. Ask friends and family for support and encouragement.
5. Replace your vaping with drinking soda (water is healthier, but soda tastes better).
6. Chew gum.
7. Drink plenty of water.
8. Get some exercise, at least walking.
9. Keep your mind busy.
10. Keep yourself busy.
11. If your flesh weekends, get right back at it and try again.
12. Reward yourself with something good to eat or buy yourself a 5-10 dollar reward after 2 days without vaping.

The medical field says that you can change any habit if you do anything for 25 days.

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If your son is not working, he should be doing chores around the house to help you.

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Romans 12:18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.

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